Loneliness

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Anonymous #1
#1
Report Thread starter 3 months ago
#1
I'm in my third year at university and only really have my flatmate and boyfriend. My boyfriend works so I don't see him during the week and my flatmate doesn't have much interest in doing things together as she has very close friends back home. I don't even know anyone on my course which is hard, especially if I need help with the work. I've looked at societies but there aren't any I really have the skills to join and I've tried talking to people in on-campus classes but it feels as though at this point people have their friends so they aren't really looking for anymore. I'm not really sure what else to do.
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CatInTheCorner
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#2
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#2
(Original post by Anonymous)
I'm in my third year at university and only really have my flatmate and boyfriend. My boyfriend works so I don't see him during the week and my flatmate doesn't have much interest in doing things together as she has very close friends back home. I don't even know anyone on my course which is hard, especially if I need help with the work. I've looked at societies but there aren't any I really have the skills to join and I've tried talking to people in on-campus classes but it feels as though at this point people have their friends so they aren't really looking for anymore. I'm not really sure what else to do.
Hi, I'm sorry, that sounds difficult. A lot of times societies also support people who don't have the skills. I joined knitting having no idea how to knit. Try something that doesn't sound too intimidating ( competitive sport societies might not be the best idea unless you've done it before ) and see how you feel. Can you contact family? Call or visit if they're nearby? Talk to your GP about support groups if it's getting challenging for your mental health
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De Montfort University
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#3
Report 3 months ago
#3
(Original post by Anonymous)
I'm in my third year at university and only really have my flatmate and boyfriend. My boyfriend works so I don't see him during the week and my flatmate doesn't have much interest in doing things together as she has very close friends back home. I don't even know anyone on my course which is hard, especially if I need help with the work. I've looked at societies but there aren't any I really have the skills to join and I've tried talking to people in on-campus classes but it feels as though at this point people have their friends so they aren't really looking for anymore. I'm not really sure what else to do.
Hey,

Do you know who the student reps are for your course? If not you could always contact your programme leader to find out. They are approachable and reliable. I often confide in them whenever I need support on assignments or any course-related issues.

As mentioned, with societies, you don't necessarily need to have the skills at hand to be able to join. There are plenty of taster sessions that occur throughout the year to try out the activities.

In my 1st Year, I joined Taekwondo. Prior to joining, I had no previous experience in any form of martial arts. However, I was welcomed and supported. I'm still part of the club to this day and I made quite a lot of friends being part of it.

I hope this helps,
- Jesse, 3rd Year Animation Student
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UniversityOfSunderland
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#4
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#4
(Original post by Anonymous)
I'm in my third year at university and only really have my flatmate and boyfriend. My boyfriend works so I don't see him during the week and my flatmate doesn't have much interest in doing things together as she has very close friends back home. I don't even know anyone on my course which is hard, especially if I need help with the work. I've looked at societies but there aren't any I really have the skills to join and I've tried talking to people in on-campus classes but it feels as though at this point people have their friends so they aren't really looking for anymore. I'm not really sure what else to do.
Firstly well done at looking into joining a society, this can be a great way to meet new people with similar interests. If there's none you are interested in, could you think about setting up your own?
Your SU should have events running throughout the year, is it possible you could attend some of these? A part-time job as an ambassador is a great way to meet new people too and you get paid.
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Coventry University Student Ambassadors
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#5
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#5
(Original post by Anonymous)
I'm in my third year at university and only really have my flatmate and boyfriend. My boyfriend works so I don't see him during the week and my flatmate doesn't have much interest in doing things together as she has very close friends back home. I don't even know anyone on my course which is hard, especially if I need help with the work. I've looked at societies but there aren't any I really have the skills to join and I've tried talking to people in on-campus classes but it feels as though at this point people have their friends so they aren't really looking for anymore. I'm not really sure what else to do.
Hi there,

My name is Eleanor and I'm a Student Ambassador at Coventry University.

I'm sorry to hear you feel alone as this couldn't be any further from the truth.

For societies, I recall being unable to find one that suited me too and so: I created one! Me and a few people from my course decided to create a society for Illustration & Animation as that's the course we're on but didn't have a club for like other subjects. This was a great benefit as it's now one of the largest societies and has helped me meet new people from not only my class but from the years below me too!

I also became a Student Ambassador to meet new people which has also been amazing and given me so many opportunities! I have became friends with so many new people with just two days of working on campus -I'm a new ambassador!-. I met people that I probably would never have met due to our subject differences and which years we're in. It's been a wonderful experience as it's given me new friends, work experience, money and acknowledgement at the University itself. You may benefit from this as much as I did as I too struggled to make friends in my course. I also live with my partner and my closest friends so it's hard not to be anti-social and stay in the house with just them. It can be quite isolating when stuck with the same people every day so it's good to break it up with some work!

Coventry University also offers events such as dating game shows and 2 minute talks where you get to meet new people in your student accommodation or in need to find friends like us! Maybe it'll be good to find out if these exist at your University as they always ended with laughs and to be honest, me and my friendship group are still friends with people we met at these events!

I hope this helps give you some options on getting out of the thought bubble of being lonely.

El
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University of Bradford
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#6
Report 3 months ago
#6
(Original post by Anonymous)
I'm in my third year at university and only really have my flatmate and boyfriend. My boyfriend works so I don't see him during the week and my flatmate doesn't have much interest in doing things together as she has very close friends back home. I don't even know anyone on my course which is hard, especially if I need help with the work. I've looked at societies but there aren't any I really have the skills to join and I've tried talking to people in on-campus classes but it feels as though at this point people have their friends so they aren't really looking for anymore. I'm not really sure what else to do.
Hey!

You definitely don't always need prior experience for many societies and clubs, so I'd definitely recommend having another look and seeing if there's anything new you can throw yourself into to try You could also have a look into volunteering opportunities, finding part-time work on campus or becoming a student ambassador - all fab ways of meeting new people.

Have you tried adding course mates on social media? If you're nervous to start conversation in person, could you try doing it online? It could be just liking their photos or replying to their stories, it might turn into a conversation and then you could arrange plans or arrange a study day at the library for example.

I wish you the best of luck with your third year!

Becky
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