The Student Room Group

getting a girlfriend...is it so hard??

well,, im 17, in my second year at college, I came from an all-boys school so not got any female friends from that age.... but now I'm at college (mixed college) I find it really hard to get a girlfriend.

I'm quite a goodlooking guy, i always get long stares and smiles off girls, in college i hang around with a few other guys from my school, so they entered college in pretty much the same situation as me, and they too are pretty goodlooking, and each have at least one girl on their radar, but me, most girls at my college seem to assume that i've aready got an undercover girlfriend, or that i'm such a socialite, i could easily have any girl i want...but the trouble is, i dont know how to approach any girl I like, and get to know her enough to ask her out... any girl i talk to enough to ask out, I really am not attracted to, all my classes have ugly girls in them, I've been stalked by a girl I really do not like, she's a very popular girl and her crush on me is pretty much common knowledge in college, is this the problem? or has she sorta jinxed me further...

I don't think I have a problem socialising because I have more than enough male mates, but now its come to the point where i'm wondering if i'll ever have a girll,

i think i've only ever really liked 2 girls, ma best mate began to date/get very close to one, and the other one, i was put off by her annoying laugh.

I've never told anyone about this problem, my family seem to think i'm hiding someone from them, and all my friends, well i just always change the subject when it comes up....
thanx to anyone who replies,

Scroll to see replies

Reply 1
You are only 17.. what is the rush! When I was 17 i did not like being involved with women too much.. Sure it was fun sometimes.. but you have the rest of your life with that. Instead I wanted to play sports and do stupid things with my friends..

I cannot believe you are asking if you will every get a girlfriend.. In two years time you might have had several..

Just be clear that this is not a problem.. There is no hurry.. If you like a girl then approach her like you would anyone else.. then ask her if she would be interested in meeting up some time so you could get to know her better..

You will have to ignore the girl that is stalking you.. or tell her you are not interested if you think it is getting in your way..
Reply 2
Guru Sauce
You are only 17.. what is the rush! When I was 17 i did not like being involved with women too much.. Sure it was fun sometimes.. but you have the rest of your life with that. Instead I wanted to play sports and do stupid things with my friends..

I cannot believe you are asking if you will every get a girlfriend.. In two years time you might have had several..

Just be clear that this is not a problem.. There is no hurry.. If you like a girl then approach her like you would anyone else.. then ask her if she would be interested in meeting up some time so you could get to know her better..

You will have to ignore the girl that is stalking you.. or tell her you are not interested if you think it is getting in your way..

true
Reply 3
Get some sex, and fun, and then move on fast, **** females you don't need them at 17.

Just walk up to a girl and state your intentions "Wanna go on a date sometime?"
Reply 4
A relationship is the last thing you want at 17.
Stand up in any sort of large gathering of people and deliver Russell Brand's unobtainable speech.
I think you think a little too much of yourself than most people think, that's your problem. Come back down to earth, you most likely aren't all that.
Anonymous
well,, im 17, in my second year at college, I came from an all-boys school so not got any female friends from that age.... but now I'm at college (mixed college) I find it really hard to get a girlfriend.

I'm quite a goodlooking guy, i always get long stares and smiles off girls, in college i hang around with a few other guys from my school, so they entered college in pretty much the same situation as me, and they too are pretty goodlooking, and each have at least one girl on their radar, but me, most girls at my college seem to assume that i've aready got an undercover girlfriend, or that i'm such a socialite, i could easily have any girl i want...but the trouble is, i dont know how to approach any girl I like, and get to know her enough to ask her out... any girl i talk to enough to ask out, I really am not attracted to, all my classes have ugly girls in them, I've been stalked by a girl I really do not like, she's a very popular girl and her crush on me is pretty much common knowledge in college, is this the problem? or has she sorta jinxed me further...

I don't think I have a problem socialising because I have more than enough male mates, but now its come to the point where i'm wondering if i'll ever have a girll,

i think i've only ever really liked 2 girls, ma best mate began to date/get very close to one, and the other one, i was put off by her annoying laugh.

I've never told anyone about this problem, my family seem to think i'm hiding someone from them, and all my friends, well i just always change the subject when it comes up....
thanx to anyone who replies,



Lmao, you sound a lot like someone I know. He told me his "problem" as a "friend" and I already gave him my opinion. I just don't want to say names because I don't know if you're the same person/if he would appreciate me mentioning him on TSR. :laugh:
ahem you're only 17 lol. Well I am too and I have a best friend, not a girl friend see the difference. Anyways it'll come without you knowing it.
Reply 9
Lampshade
A relationship is the last thing you want at 17.


um, maybe i read it wrong but i'm quite sure he wants one :rolleyes:

I'm 18 and my life is just fine thank you.
kklol
um, maybe i read it wrong but i'm quite sure he wants one :rolleyes:

I'm 18 and my life is just fine thank you.


He thinks he wants one. There's a big opportunity cost in getting involved in a full on relationship so young.
Reply 11
Anonymous
well,, im 17, in my second year at college, I came from an all-boys school so not got any female friends from that age.... but now I'm at college (mixed college) I find it really hard to get a girlfriend.

I'm quite a goodlooking guy, i always get long stares and smiles off girls, in college i hang around with a few other guys from my school, so they entered college in pretty much the same situation as me, and they too are pretty goodlooking, and each have at least one girl on their radar, but me, most girls at my college seem to assume that i've aready got an undercover girlfriend, or that i'm such a socialite, i could easily have any girl i want...but the trouble is, i dont know how to approach any girl I like, and get to know her enough to ask her out... any girl i talk to enough to ask out, I really am not attracted to, all my classes have ugly girls in them, I've been stalked by a girl I really do not like, she's a very popular girl and her crush on me is pretty much common knowledge in college, is this the problem? or has she sorta jinxed me further...

I don't think I have a problem socialising because I have more than enough male mates, but now its come to the point where i'm wondering if i'll ever have a girll,

i think i've only ever really liked 2 girls, ma best mate began to date/get very close to one, and the other one, i was put off by her annoying laugh.

I've never told anyone about this problem, my family seem to think i'm hiding someone from them, and all my friends, well i just always change the subject when it comes up....
thanx to anyone who replies,


:rofl:
how bad can it be?
TI-84
:rofl:
how bad can it be?


Maybe its like Janice from Friends.
Reply 13
Lampshade
He thinks he wants one. There's a big opportunity cost in getting involved in a full on relationship so young.


Everything has an opportunity cost. And obviously there are things i can't do in a relationship i could otherwise but there are also plenty of things i can now do which i can't otherwise.

My grades, mates, family, hobbies have not suffered at all. And my sex life definitely hasn't :wink: In my situation, and admittedly i seem to be part of a lucky few, the benefits of my young relationship outweigh the negatives by a huge margin.

I'm not deluded either. I know it may not last. But that's the same for any relationship and at current trends, and it's being over 3 years, it's got plenty of energy left and i love every minute.

And OP doesn't sound unlike myself 3 years ago for the record.

Love/relationships is/are NOT a science. He may/may not know what he wants...you can't simply make assumptions based on clichés about ''young love'' and your own experiences
Original post by &#1109
Maybe its like Janice from Friends.


Mine is pretty bad and I've been with my boyfriend for a year :smile:
People say they actually miss it though. Either they're telling the truth or trying to make me feel better, but ho hum. :biggrin:
oooo you sound like me at that age, but a guy.
single sex schools really dont prepare you for the dating world.......
just give it time and they will come flooding in, dont rush it
Reply 16
Original post by &#1109
Maybe its like Janice from Friends.


:lolwut:

then stay clear! :p:
Reply 17
cheeseinthedraw
oooo you sound like me at that age, but a guy.
single sex schools really dont prepare you for the dating world.......
just give it time and they will come flooding in, dont rush it

single sex schools, hmmmm, i can be perfectly comfortable around guys but when it comes to girls, and becoming better friends with them, it always feels so weird, i started to think i was gay last year, but when i thought about being gay it made me sick, no offence to nay gay people
Reply 18
TI-84
:rofl:
how bad can it be?

it was so irritating, coz she would laugh and really kindof screech for a good few minutes, and her voice was pretty much the same, she was the only girl i ever really knew from childhood, i thought it would be a good start but maybe not...
Reply 19
Lampshade
He thinks he wants one. There's a big opportunity cost in getting involved in a full on relationship so young.

dude im finding it really difficult to understand how ur comments relate,, oppurtunity cost, makes it sound like economics...