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I am not good enough

So, I am about to graduate from the Top University in The UK ( my degree is in chemistry )

I am graduating with a 2.1
My Gcses were rubbish ( 4Bs, 1 C, 1D and 5A*s )
my A-levels: AAA
I have Math tutoring, Teaching year-1 students chemistry + math, being a course rep, 2 weeks working for a charity full time, academic excellence merir ( for A-levels ). Thats it

The reason why I have no internships is because at Uni I started hating chemistry ... so much that I decided to reject my year in industry ... and do something else. ( In my first--->second year summer .. my internship got cancelled because of covid year: 2020 ).

So, I basically have 2 empty summers... I did get a Job offer from a top 20 finance company in the world... but that top 20. I am so ashamed of myself... I didn't even get to the interview stage at the Big 4.
Is my career now cursed? that I will be less successful than some of my as hardworking friends.

Looking at my Friend. He got 4A*s at A-level, did so much more experience than me... now he got an offer at PwC. I worked much harder than him.. did over 50 past papers for every subject... and I only got low 3 As.... I'm a dump? if I need my time to achieve not even the same results... but slightly lower.
I went through sacrifices ... no social life... haven't dated anyone in more than 2 years... just be getting mid 60s for my degree... when I see my mates having good relationships and better results academically.

I am also doing an ACA contract after UNI.... I am scarred that I may fail as I may not be smart enough. My IQ is 128... still no reflections in my own life.

I also do sports... to keep my brain working... I am able to do 30 pull ups and over 200 push ups in one go... so I am relatively fit. I spend about 10 hours a day doing uni work.... I just feel that I am worthless and I am wasting my Parents' time and nerves.

I want to stand out... I want people to be proud of me. I want them to respect me. I want to be valuable to the world
Original post by skyangelbro
So, I am about to graduate from the Top University in The UK ( my degree is in chemistry )

I am graduating with a 2.1
My Gcses were rubbish ( 4Bs, 1 C, 1D and 5A*s )
my A-levels: AAA
I have Math tutoring, Teaching year-1 students chemistry + math, being a course rep, 2 weeks working for a charity full time, academic excellence merir ( for A-levels ). Thats it

The reason why I have no internships is because at Uni I started hating chemistry ... so much that I decided to reject my year in industry ... and do something else. ( In my first--->second year summer .. my internship got cancelled because of covid year: 2020 ).

So, I basically have 2 empty summers... I did get a Job offer from a top 20 finance company in the world... but that top 20. I am so ashamed of myself... I didn't even get to the interview stage at the Big 4.
Is my career now cursed? that I will be less successful than some of my as hardworking friends.

Looking at my Friend. He got 4A*s at A-level, did so much more experience than me... now he got an offer at PwC. I worked much harder than him.. did over 50 past papers for every subject... and I only got low 3 As.... I'm a dump? if I need my time to achieve not even the same results... but slightly lower.
I went through sacrifices ... no social life... haven't dated anyone in more than 2 years... just be getting mid 60s for my degree... when I see my mates having good relationships and better results academically.

I am also doing an ACA contract after UNI.... I am scarred that I may fail as I may not be smart enough. My IQ is 128... still no reflections in my own life.

I also do sports... to keep my brain working... I am able to do 30 pull ups and over 200 push ups in one go... so I am relatively fit. I spend about 10 hours a day doing uni work.... I just feel that I am worthless and I am wasting my Parents' time and nerves.

I want to stand out... I want people to be proud of me. I want them to respect me. I want to be valuable to the world

Bestie you paint yourself as really unlikeable rn.... your GCSEs are rubbish and neither are your a levels so start there and try to be more sensitive when posting that on a student forum where many students with grades less than yours will see and think twice about themselves.
Original post by Anonymous
Bestie you paint yourself as really unlikeable rn.... your GCSEs are rubbish and neither are your a levels so start there and try to be more sensitive when posting that on a student forum where many students with grades less than yours will see and think twice about themselves.

I think you meant aren’t rubbish right
Original post by anonymous
i think you meant aren’t rubbish right

ooops i meant aren't rubbish typo
Original post by Anonymous
Bestie you paint yourself as really unlikeable rn.... your GCSEs are rubbish and neither are your a levels so start there and try to be more sensitive when posting that on a student forum where many students with grades less than yours will see and think twice about themselves.

*Aren't. Anyway you have a job offer and a chance of earning money stop comparing yourself cos that's really unhealthy
Original post by Anonymous
ooops i meant aren't rubbish typo

Yeah nws anyways I agree with what you said, I’m pretty much leaving secondary with fails maybe, I would love to get the grades that this guy calls rubbish
You deffo stand out….. not sure if people would respect you for it
Original post by skyangelbro
So, I am about to graduate from the Top University in The UK ( my degree is in chemistry )

I am graduating with a 2.1
My Gcses were rubbish ( 4Bs, 1 C, 1D and 5A*s )
my A-levels: AAA
I have Math tutoring, Teaching year-1 students chemistry + math, being a course rep, 2 weeks working for a charity full time, academic excellence merir ( for A-levels ). Thats it

The reason why I have no internships is because at Uni I started hating chemistry ... so much that I decided to reject my year in industry ... and do something else. ( In my first--->second year summer .. my internship got cancelled because of covid year: 2020 ).

So, I basically have 2 empty summers... I did get a Job offer from a top 20 finance company in the world... but that top 20. I am so ashamed of myself... I didn't even get to the interview stage at the Big 4.
Is my career now cursed? that I will be less successful than some of my as hardworking friends.

Looking at my Friend. He got 4A*s at A-level, did so much more experience than me... now he got an offer at PwC. I worked much harder than him.. did over 50 past papers for every subject... and I only got low 3 As.... I'm a dump? if I need my time to achieve not even the same results... but slightly lower.
I went through sacrifices ... no social life... haven't dated anyone in more than 2 years... just be getting mid 60s for my degree... when I see my mates having good relationships and better results academically.

I am also doing an ACA contract after UNI.... I am scarred that I may fail as I may not be smart enough. My IQ is 128... still no reflections in my own life.

I also do sports... to keep my brain working... I am able to do 30 pull ups and over 200 push ups in one go... so I am relatively fit. I spend about 10 hours a day doing uni work.... I just feel that I am worthless and I am wasting my Parents' time and nerves.

I want to stand out... I want people to be proud of me. I want them to respect me. I want to be valuable to the world

You need to stop being so tough on yourself bro, I totally understand you though, my brain just loves to beat myself up. But please be proud of your accomplishments, you can’t keep comparing yourself to people who have completely different lives from you. And you don’t need people to be proud of you or respect you, you need yourself to do that, you need to be proud of yourself, you need to respect yourself. If you can’t do that then how do you expect others to do the same
There will be people in life who are cleverer than you, harder working than you, fitter than you, more likeable than you, and more successful than you. That's not a criticism, it's true for all of us. (Well, I guess except for the one person in the world who is actually the Best Person. Whoever that is. Nobody cares.)

I do wonder why you are applying for finance if you want people to be proud of you and to make a difference in the world? It's entirely possible that your subconscious is trying to tell you something, and there's plenty of time to reconsider. You shouldn't be this unhappy about a job offer which many people would be desperate to get. Are you becoming aware that actually you much preferred that charity work or something? If so, that's okay. Just because you could work in finance doesn't mean you have to.

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