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Advice on bf’s family

I met my bf’s mother this week as I slept at my boyfriends’ (he lives at his parents’ place).
After meeting his mom on the first day, I spent th ex second day with her and my dog as my bf was gone for uni. We talked and it was nice to have talked a lot. We also cooked (separately). However, that day, she mentioned a girl’s name, who is an old friend on my bf. She said that there might have been something between them but they called it quits…

The next day, his mother came up to me and told me she checked my Facebook and Instagram. She told me that her best friend also checked me out, on my YouTube.

I feel harassed. This is too much for me. I feel that this is not normal for a mother to tell me such things and to gossip about me with her best friend.

I talked about the girl (she mentioned to me the other day) to my bf. He told me that she (his mom) wanted him & this girl to be together back then, but nothing happened as he didn’t want to have anything with her. He mentioned she (the girl) might have wanted to have something with him.

This situation is weird. Please help. What’s going on?
Is this a red flag for the mom to behave like this? I honestly think it is…
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marple
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Original post by Anonymous
I met my bf’s mother this week as I slept at my boyfriends’ (he lives at his parents’ place).
After meeting his mom on the first day, I spent th ex second day with her and my dog as my bf was gone for uni. We talked and it was nice to have talked a lot. We also cooked (separately). However, that day, she mentioned a girl’s name, who is an old friend on my bf. She said that there might have been something between them but they called it quits…

The next day, his mother came up to me and told me she checked my Facebook and Instagram. She told me that her best friend also checked me out, on my YouTube.

I feel harassed. This is too much for me. I feel that this is not normal for a mother to tell me such things and to gossip about me with her best friend.

I talked about the girl (she mentioned to me the other day) to my bf. He told me that she (his mom) wanted him & this girl to be together back then, but nothing happened as he didn’t want to have anything with her. He mentioned she (the girl) might have wanted to have something with him.

This situation is weird. Please help. What’s going on?
Is this a red flag for the mom to behave like this? I honestly think it is…

To be honest, what is weird is for you to spend the day alone with his mother the day after you met her and for you to make yourself so at home in her house. All a bit too fast, too soon and rather uncomfortable.
Are your bf's family very high profile or wealthy?
Sounds like your bf's mother is a nosy person.
May have a history of interfering in other people's relationship, spreading gossip or trying to contol who her son/ all her children date.
Always trust your gut instinct and listen to what your common sense is telling you.
Good luck!
This does sound awkward. For the most part, I'd recommend maintaining the communication between you and your boyfriend. His mother may or may not want to interfere, perhaps she's just quite direct and as any mother does, wants to know about her son's girlfriend.

It sounds like you handled it as well as you could. Unfortunately, this may just be something you have to live with. It's a shame that it's overwhelming for you. Maybe try to limit however much time you must spend around her.

If she ever steps out of line, though, make sure to let your boyfriend know. For now, please don't stress too much about it.

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