Why can't I ever pick up girls?

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Anonymous #1
#1
Report Thread starter 2 months ago
#1
Every time I go to clubs no matter what I do no girls are interested in me, yet I see guys acting really obnoxious and they always attract girls. What am I doing wrong?
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Anonymous #2
#2
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#2
are you ugly? are you short? do you come off as a "nice" guy? all could be reasons
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Anonymous #3
#3
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#3
as a gay guy i can say that, when drunk especially, guys who are obnoxious but look sexy are instantly appealing, and kind/nice people who arent necessarily as classically attractive dont appeal when in certain situations

therefore you might not be picking at the right strings if that makes sense
if thats the case, i am sorry
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Anonymous #4
#4
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#4
(Original post by Anonymous)
Every time I go to clubs no matter what I do no girls are interested in me, yet I see guys acting really obnoxious and they always attract girls. What am I doing wrong?
Maybe you are desperate, we girls run a mile from a guy who we sense is desperate for sex
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Anonymous #1
#5
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#5
(Original post by Anonymous)
are you ugly? are you short? do you come off as a "nice" guy? all could be reasons
I'm not ugly, I'm 6' 1, maybe I come across nice. Is nice bad?
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zuluwarrior7650
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#6
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#6
u need to weightlifting and start manifesting magnetism
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Anonymous #1
#7
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#7
(Original post by Dunnig Kruger)
Make a recording of an interaction. Post the video on youtube. Provide links here.

Then you might get some constructive positiive feedback, and guidance.

Along with a certain amount of idiotic trolls. And sub-optimum advice.
Easy way to tell if the advice is sub-optimum is to put it to the test. Just be aware that placebo is a thing. And placebo helps when it comes to man to woman social skills.
How can I record an interaction and it be in any way natural?
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Anonymous #1
#8
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#8
(Original post by Anonymous)
Maybe you are desperate, we girls run a mile from a guy who we sense is desperate for sex
I'm not desperate but girls just show no interest in me, so I just resort to dancing with drunk girls
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BradM99
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#9
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#9
(Original post by Anonymous)
I'm not desperate but girls just show no interest in me, so I just resort to dancing with drunk girls
If you weren't desperate you wouldn't be asking why you can't pick girls up at a place where people go to have fun and dance.

If you want a hookup try Tinder or something I guess
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Anonymous #1
#10
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#10
(Original post by BradM99)
If you weren't desperate you wouldn't be asking why you can't pick girls up at a place where people go to have fun and dance.

If you want a hookup try Tinder or something I guess
People also go to clubs to hook up
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Gerpstarg
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#11
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#11
If girls don`t like you, its could be looks and behavior.

If your looks are bad, then there is nothing you can do other than lowering you standards till you hit the bottom.

Then ask yourself: do you really need "that". By that I mean chubby unattractive cringe girls that will take their clothes off and your noodle will not even work.
Last edited by Gerpstarg; 2 months ago
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Anonymous #1
#12
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#12
(Original post by Gerpstarg)
If girls don`t like you, its 100% the looks and behavior.

If your looks are bad, then there is nothing you can do other than lowering you standards till you hit the bottom.

Then ask yourself: do you really need "that". By that I mean chubby unattractive cringe girls that will take their clothes off and your noodle will not even work.
Obviously I don't want that. The only success I've had with attractive girls is when they are really drunk and they let me feel them up when they're dancing. But that doesn't feel great
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Dunnig Kruger
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#13
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#13
(Original post by Anonymous)
How can I record an interaction and it be in any way natural?
Either get one of those hidden cameras, eg one hidden in a watch.
Or use a GoPro type camera or your mobile phone, which you can leave recording in your top pocket.

If you are in a publicly accessible place in the UK, it's legal for you to film anything you can see.

It's up to you if you tell the person in front of you that you are filming them. You could say you're doing a social experiment. Mention it as if it's no big deal. And then just get on with one of your normal conversations with them.
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Anonymous #5
#14
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#14
Without a photo it's impossible to rate your physical looks, but being tall is obviously a bonus as a lot of girls like tall guys. Being successful clubbing is also about your image, clubs are often very fashion conscious so maybe you need to improve your clothes or hairstyle? Also girls often like guys who can dance reasonably well, so maybe you need to work on that. Also coming off as desperate is bad.
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Old Skool Freak
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#15
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#15
(Original post by Anonymous)
Every time I go to clubs no matter what I do no girls are interested in me, yet I see guys acting really obnoxious and they always attract girls. What am I doing wrong?
When you approach girls, how do you do it? You'd be surprised how important that first impression is. There's a lot of truth in the clichés:- 'Frist impressions last and you never get a second chance to make a first impression'. To give you an example, there are a few things that almost always create a bad first impression:-


1) Trying to dance with her, uninvited:- A lot of horny guys will often go up and try dancing with girls. This can be anything from the full on grope to "dancing AT them". Almost any cold approach on the dancefloor will make you look like a sleazebag, so don't do it!. Furthermore, if you do go in for the grope, then it's technically sexual assault... which can not only land you a criminal record, but could potentially put you on the sex offenders register. The one exception to pulling on the dancefloor is if you can actually dance... even then it's more you use your dancing as bait to attract the girls to you.

Having said that, the dancefloor can be a good place to escalate things, once you've got past that initial stage.


2) Using an ancient chat-up line:- Chat up lines are completely cringe IMHO, and they show that you lack originality and thought. As well as the questionable content, she'll know that you've probably used that same line on 000's of girls in the past (hardly original now is it). Personally, I've never met anyone who's successfully pulled using a traditional chat-up line (at least anyone worth pulling lol). I find opening with a smile and a simple "Hey, how's it going?" works best.

3) Talking to her chest:- A discrete glance is OK... but when you're literally talking to her boobs, it obviously is going to make her uncomfortable. Even glancing, you need be careful of, she'll know every time you've had a peek and she's got a "cut-off" amount in her head (it's normally pretty low). Any more than that, and you're just another creep she can't wait to get away from.

4) Approaching large girl groups:- To the untrained eye, these may look like rich pickings... but unless you're a 6' stripper, any approach to them is almost certainly going to be met with a hostile response. More often than not, they're probably celebrating something specific (e.g. a hen-do, a sports team etc), so they're more interested in bonding with each other than picking up random guys. Sometimes, it can work if you approach one girl away from the main group... the mistake some guys do here is they'll typically go for the most wasted girl in the group. However, her less-smashed mates will be watching her like a hawk... and woe betide anyone who tries to take sexual advantage of her.

Instead, from my experience, the girls who are normally receptive to being approached tend to be out in groups of 2-3. It often helps if you've got a mate (wingman) who can at least talk to the other girl(s) while you get your charm on .

5) You've fallen down the rabbit hole:- Girls can be quite observant on their surroundings. Therefore, if she sees that you're getting blown out more times than a wind-sock, she's going to question what's wrong with you. At the very least, it'll look bad on her if she's the only girl who'll give you the time of day. When you know that's happened, it's probably best to just cut your losses and give up.

Without knowing exactly how you approach girls, we can't definitively advise you what you're doing wrong... but the above are probably the most common mistakes I see people making.

Hope that helps
Last edited by Old Skool Freak; 2 months ago
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Old Skool Freak
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#16
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#16
(Original post by Anonymous)
I'm not desperate but girls just show no interest in me, so I just resort to dancing with drunk girls
Doesn't matter what you think... what matters is the impression you're giving off to everyone around you.

... and I'm sorry, but the above makes you come across as both desperate and a sleazebag.
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napqueen
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#17
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#17
(Original post by Anonymous)
Every time I go to clubs no matter what I do no girls are interested in me, yet I see guys acting really obnoxious and they always attract girls. What am I doing wrong?
It seems these days girls like the bad guy which is crazy
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asif007
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#18
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#18
(Original post by Old Skool Freak)
When you approach girls, how do you do it? You'd be surprised how important that first impression is. There's a lot of truth in the clichés:- 'Frist impressions last and you never get a second chance to make a first impression'. To give you an example, there are a few things that almost always create a bad first impression:-


1) Trying to dance with her, uninvited:- A lot of horny guys will often go up and try dancing with girls. This can be anything from the full on grope to "dancing AT them". Almost any cold approach on the dancefloor will make you look like a sleazebag, so don't do it!. Furthermore, if you do go in for the grope, then it's technically sexual assault... which can not only land you a criminal record, but could potentially put you on the sex offenders register. The one exception to pulling on the dancefloor is if you can actually dance... even then it's more you use your dancing as bait to attract the girls to you.

Having said that, the dancefloor can be a good place to escalate things, once you've got past that initial stage.


2) Using an ancient chat-up line:- Chat up lines are completely cringe IMHO, and they show that you lack originality and thought. As well as the questionable content, she'll know that you've probably used that same line on 000's of girls in the past (hardly original now is it). Personally, I've never met anyone who's successfully pulled using a traditional chat-up line (at least anyone worth pulling lol). I find opening with a smile and a simple "Hey, how's it going?" works best.

3) Talking to her chest:- A discrete glance is OK... but when you're literally talking to her boobs, it obviously is going to make her uncomfortable. Even glancing, you need be careful of, she'll know every time you've had a peek and she's got a "cut-off" amount in her head (it's normally pretty low). Any more than that, and you're just another creep she can't wait to get away from.

4) Approaching large girl groups:- To the untrained eye, these may look like rich pickings... but unless you're a 6' stripper, any approach to them is almost certainly going to be met with a hostile response. More often than not, they're probably celebrating something specific (e.g. a hen-do, a sports team etc), so they're more interested in bonding with each other than picking up random guys. Sometimes, it can work if you approach one girl away from the main group... the mistake some guys do here is they'll typically go for the most wasted girl in the group. However, her less-smashed mates will be watching her like a hawk... and woe betide anyone who tries to take sexual advantage of her.

Instead, from my experience, the girls who are normally receptive to being approached tend to be out in groups of 2-3. It often helps if you've got a mate (wingman) who can at least talk to the other girl(s) while you get your charm on .

5) You've fallen down the rabbit hole:- Girls can be quite observant on their surroundings. Therefore, if she sees that you're getting blown out more times than a wind-sock, she's going to question what's wrong with you. At the very least, it'll look bad on her if she's the only girl who'll give you the time of day. When you know that's happened, it's probably best to just cut your losses and give up.

Without knowing exactly how you approach girls, we can't definitively advise you what you're doing wrong... but the above are probably the most common mistakes I see people making.

Hope that helps
Lots of solid advice here. PRSOM.
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asif007
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#19
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#19
(Original post by napqueen)
It seems these days girls like the bad guy which is crazy
Surprising to see a girl admitting this. They're usually in furious denial about it, or they try to rationalise chasing the bad boy who always disappoints them. Yet they keep going back for more.
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Anonymous #6
#20
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#20
(Original post by Old Skool Freak)
When you approach girls, how do you do it? You'd be surprised how important that first impression is. There's a lot of truth in the clichés:- 'Frist impressions last and you never get a second chance to make a first impression'. To give you an example, there are a few things that almost always create a bad first impression:-


1) Trying to dance with her, uninvited:- A lot of horny guys will often go up and try dancing with girls. This can be anything from the full on grope to "dancing AT them". Almost any cold approach on the dancefloor will make you look like a sleazebag, so don't do it!. Furthermore, if you do go in for the grope, then it's technically sexual assault... which can not only land you a criminal record, but could potentially put you on the sex offenders register. The one exception to pulling on the dancefloor is if you can actually dance... even then it's more you use your dancing as bait to attract the girls to you.

Having said that, the dancefloor can be a good place to escalate things, once you've got past that initial stage.


2) Using an ancient chat-up line:- Chat up lines are completely cringe IMHO, and they show that you lack originality and thought. As well as the questionable content, she'll know that you've probably used that same line on 000's of girls in the past (hardly original now is it). Personally, I've never met anyone who's successfully pulled using a traditional chat-up line (at least anyone worth pulling lol). I find opening with a smile and a simple "Hey, how's it going?" works best.

3) Talking to her chest:- A discrete glance is OK... but when you're literally talking to her boobs, it obviously is going to make her uncomfortable. Even glancing, you need be careful of, she'll know every time you've had a peek and she's got a "cut-off" amount in her head (it's normally pretty low). Any more than that, and you're just another creep she can't wait to get away from.

4) Approaching large girl groups:- To the untrained eye, these may look like rich pickings... but unless you're a 6' stripper, any approach to them is almost certainly going to be met with a hostile response. More often than not, they're probably celebrating something specific (e.g. a hen-do, a sports team etc), so they're more interested in bonding with each other than picking up random guys. Sometimes, it can work if you approach one girl away from the main group... the mistake some guys do here is they'll typically go for the most wasted girl in the group. However, her less-smashed mates will be watching her like a hawk... and woe betide anyone who tries to take sexual advantage of her.

Instead, from my experience, the girls who are normally receptive to being approached tend to be out in groups of 2-3. It often helps if you've got a mate (wingman) who can at least talk to the other girl(s) while you get your charm on .

5) You've fallen down the rabbit hole:- Girls can be quite observant on their surroundings. Therefore, if she sees that you're getting blown out more times than a wind-sock, she's going to question what's wrong with you. At the very least, it'll look bad on her if she's the only girl who'll give you the time of day. When you know that's happened, it's probably best to just cut your losses and give up.

Without knowing exactly how you approach girls, we can't definitively advise you what you're doing wrong... but the above are probably the most common mistakes I see people making.

Hope that helps
wow, as a girl, this is the most helpful and detailed account of how a guy should best pick up a girl - straight facts the whole way lol
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