Can someone mark this?

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ArizonaRobbins
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#1
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#1
(Geography Natural Hazards)
- Evaluate the immediate and long term responses to a tropical storm
(9 marks + 3 SPAG) - so 12 marks altogether

One example of a tropical storm is Typhoon Haiyan, which destroyed the Eastern Philippines in November 2013.
Prior to Typhoon Haiyan, many responses were coordinated before the arrival of the storm. For example, mangrove trees were planted near the coast to reduce the storm surge. However, the intensity of the storm meant that the storm surge was bigger than usual, so the mangrove trees didn't block most of the water. This shows that the response was ineffective.
During Typhoon Haiyan, many immediate responses were co-ordinated, which aimed to reduce deaths and injuries. One example of this is that search and rescue teams tried looking and rescuing people who were lost and/or injured. However, the high population density of the Philippines meant that not everybody was found. This made the overall immediate response somewhat ineffective.
After Typhoon Haiyan, many long- term responses were coordinated in order to help rebuild and strengthen the city. One example of this is that a law was passed, which made building on the coast illegal, to avoid destruction to buildings. However, the large population density of the Philippines meant that other regions became more largely crowded, showing that the overall response was somewhat ineffective.

I would be really grateful if somebody could mark this answer and give me a mark (out of 12)
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tinyperson
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#2
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#2
very good
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cleveranimal666
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#3
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#3
I'd say 6 or 7/9, cba to look over spag. Maybe just a bit more analysis within your points would help you gain full marks.
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alberw21
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#4
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#4
(Original post by ArizonaRobbins)
(Geography Natural Hazards)
- Evaluate the immediate and long term responses to a tropical storm
(9 marks + 3 SPAG) - so 12 marks altogether

One example of a tropical storm is Typhoon Haiyan, which destroyed the Eastern Philippines in November 2013.
Prior to Typhoon Haiyan, many responses were coordinated before the arrival of the storm. For example, mangrove trees were planted near the coast to reduce the storm surge. However, the intensity of the storm meant that the storm surge was bigger than usual, so the mangrove trees didn't block most of the water. This shows that the response was ineffective.
During Typhoon Haiyan, many immediate responses were co-ordinated, which aimed to reduce deaths and injuries. One example of this is that search and rescue teams tried looking and rescuing people who were lost and/or injured. However, the high population density of the Philippines meant that not everybody was found. This made the overall immediate response somewhat ineffective.
After Typhoon Haiyan, many long- term responses were coordinated in order to help rebuild and strengthen the city. One example of this is that a law was passed, which made building on the coast illegal, to avoid destruction to buildings. However, the large population density of the Philippines meant that other regions became more largely crowded, showing that the overall response was somewhat ineffective.

I would be really grateful if somebody could mark this answer and give me a mark (out of 12)
i'd say 5/9 + 3/3 spag. the points you have are so far good you just need a bit more analysis and perhaps more than one example of a long term and immediate response. try to include figures of the deaths maybe (?) to show you know the case study well. lastly, you need a conclusion where you say which responses you thought were more effective than the others.
but otherwise good work
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cloes
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#5
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#5
i would give it a 6
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