absolutely gutted...

im deeply in love with a girl but she fanciess my mate, what should i do? how do i get over her?

Reply 1

Anonymous

im deeply in love with a girl but she fanciess my mate, what should i do? how do i get over her?

I'm sorry to have to roll out the cliches but the only thing thats gonna help you at all is...time.

You cant just turn off how you feel, unfortunately. It will fade eventually.

Reply 2

wholenewworld

It can hurt like hell, but first of all accept your feelings and avoid the trap of 'why is he so much better than me?' and other similarly futile ponderings.

I would suggest be friends with the girl, be yourself and you just never know. Maybe they will get together and then find they are not suited to each other and split up in 2 months' time. Maybe they are and will go on for 2 years. They might not even get together.

And who knows you two might not have worked even. There's no way of knowing that, but you know that unrequited love is fantasising only (unfortunately) and you just can't know how it might have worked out if you'd really got together. I think that's important to accept and also to rationalise saying that this is how I feel, but the best I can do.. is what I mentioned above. Accept the situation, remain friendly with the girl and be yourself.

Reply 3

brapboybrap

plant cocaine on your mate. that'll teach'um.

Reply 4

Anonymous #1

wholenewworld

I would suggest be friends with the girl, be yourself and you just never know. Maybe they will get together and then find they are not suited to each other and split up in 2 months' time. Maybe they are and will go on for 2 years. They might not even get together.

you really think i should try and be friends with her?

Reply 5

wholenewworld

Anonymous

you really think i should try and be friends with her?

Yes I do, although I do not know enough about the situation.
1. How well do you know her, how long have you known her?
2. Does your mate know how you feel?
3. Does she know how you feel?
4. Are you really suited? (I don't deny that you can love someone , but if she's the party girl 24/7 and you'd rather read a good book or watch a DVD then you are clearly not suited.)

Am happy to help but please give me more info.

Reply 6

User203443

I'm going to say you can't fall in love with someone without being with them first.

Reply 7

wholenewworld

Ramble

I'm going to say you can't fall in love with someone without being with them first.

You may be right, but essentially what is love?! It's a matter of definition.

But I'm tempted to agree, unrequited love is painful and sometimes even beautiful but it is not love in the same sense as when it's reciprocated. But it's still a very intense feeling and can be even more debilitating than the love you feel when it's returned because you imagine everything to be perfect and it's also out of reach which just deepens your longing.

Reply 8

Anonymous #2

Ramble

I'm going to say you can't fall in love with someone without being with them first.

You can say what you like.. doesnt make it true. Having said that i wish it was. I am in the same situation as the OP, apart from i am a girl

OP - when you find the answer make sure to let us know.

Reply 9

princess_sue

Tell her - she says no - you hate her - you get over her.

Sorted.

Reply 10

Anonymous #1

problem is i'm really good friends with my mate so he probably going to hate me if i do anything but i think he is starting to figure out that i like her

iv known her for a few months and im pretty shure she likes me but i cant tell if its just as friends but she practically perfect for me we have so much in common, music, films same sense of humour.

it just tears me up inside and i just have no idea what to do