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#21
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#21
(Original post by Mad Vlad)
Yeah... some of them. I talk to some on the net as well... but its not the same as seeing them all in the common room every day
A lot of my friends were girls you see... and at uni... I don't have any girly mates and thats really depressing.
Aaah, well apart from going to visit your mates at their respective unis whenever you get a spare weekend, there's not a lot you can do about the not seeing them issue I'm afraid. That's where just randomly sending little things like pictures or postcards with messages or things you see that remind you of them come in. Like you would do if you saw them everyday in the common room and saw something you wanted to show someone. Just post it instead. It'll be a nice suprise for your mate, and shows that you're still thinking about them

In the mean time, it's not *that* long until Easter... think about what you can do when you're on hols then. If your mates are scattered around the country, perhaps start thinking about how you could all meet up somewhere in the middle for a weekend or something

As for the girly mates at uni... well, hmm... I spose you can pop along to the SU bar and just start up a conversation with someone that looks like someone friendly at the bar...? (Just don't make it look like you're chatting them up... unless you are )

Hope it works out matey, it's tough but hang in there
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mangomaz
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#22
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#22
its one of those things wer u always say 'yeh we'll definately keep in touch' but u never do. its like wen u find a new group of friends u realise how much u never really fit with the other lot in the first place. and also sometimes no matter how hard u try u will drift just because u can change as a person (not necessarily in a bad way).

having said that, my best friend hasnt changed since my first secondary school even tho we went our seperate ways for sixth form and uni. i only see her about once every 1-2 months or less but shes one of those people i always feel so close to and its like we never were apart.. oh i love her!

ok sorry stopping with the appreciating best friend stuff hehe..
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#23
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#23
(Original post by Helenia)
Well, better for me - I'm sure my old group of friends would have dropped this lot much the same as they did me, when it suited them. I wasn't desperately unhappy at school, but looking back, I never properly fitted into the place, through nobody's fault really, and now I have my place and I'm happy with it.
That's good that you've found your place at uni and are totally happy there I spose I'm kind of the other way round in a sense, I had the best time of my life at school, years 12 and 13 in the common room were especially great. Uni's ok, and I do have some fantastic friends there, but everything just seemed a little easier and more care-free at school for some reason


(Original post by Helenia)
Oh, I'm not saying I suddenly decided "Right, I don't want to be friends with them any more," or anything like that. We exchanged phone numbers and e-mails etc when we left, and vaguely kept in touch with each other for a while, but I just had little to say of interest to them and vice versa, and we just drifted apart. It wasn't an active thing, just the way things moved.
Nono, I wasn't suggesting you did (did I? I hope not!) ... yeah sometimes it happens that you just drift apart if you don't have that much in common, that's when you start to realise who your true friends are and who are just acquantances (sp?!).
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#24
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#24
(Original post by mangomaz)
having said that, my best friend hasnt changed since my first secondary school even tho we went our seperate ways for sixth form and uni. i only see her about once every 1-2 months or less but shes one of those people i always feel so close to and its like we never were apart.. oh i love her!
I totally know what you mean. I've known one of my best, closest friends since we were 5 and I met him on my first day at primary school. Sure, we have our fallings out and we occasionally differ on our ideas, but I still love him to bits and wouldn't change him for the world.

"A man is nothing if he doesn't have friends" - someone said that at some point, didn't they? lol either way, I like it
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mangomaz
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#25
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#25
(Original post by red665)
That's good that you've found your place at uni and are totally happy there I spose I'm kind of the other way round in a sense, I had the best time of my life at school, years 12 and 13 in the common room were especially great. Uni's ok, and I do have some fantastic friends there, but everything just seemed a little easier and more care-free at school for some reason
yeh im the same i loved my sixth form sooo much i dont think iv ever been in an environment where iv just fit in so well so quickly and i really felt i just clicked in that environment... it was as tho id been there from the start (most others had been there since yr7). i think i was expecting the same settling in really quickly at uni as well but i dont no.. it didnt really happen which really surprised me (iv never found it hard settling in) and threw me as well so i didnt really enjoy my first term at uni much.. getting better now tho
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Helenia
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#26
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#26
(Original post by red665)
Nono, I wasn't suggesting you did (did I? I hope not!) ... yeah sometimes it happens that you just drift apart if you don't have that much in common, that's when you start to realise who your true friends are and who are just acquantances (sp?!).
Yeah, it's very true - in school we were friends because we had to be because we lived together/at least spent over 40 hours a week in each others' company. Whereas now I can choose who I'm friends with and I find people I like. There's only one girl from school who I would still like to be in touch with, but she seems to have fallen off the face of the planet, nobody has heard from her!

Having said all this, there is one group of friends who I have kept in very good contact with - 18 months ago I went on a trip to Mexico with 5 other girls and two leaders, and the whole group just bonded so well, despite only having met each other a couple of times before the trip and then spent 3 weeks together. We're still in touch, despite being scattered around, and have reunions every opportunity we can. So it really is about who your friends are. Plus of course, people do change, so the people who are your best friends now may not be one day (even though some still are)
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Mad Vlad
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#27
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#27
(Original post by red665)
Aaah, well apart from going to visit your mates at their respective unis whenever you get a spare weekend, there's not a lot you can do about the not seeing them issue I'm afraid. That's where just randomly sending little things like pictures or postcards with messages or things you see that remind you of them come in. Like you would do if you saw them everyday in the common room and saw something you wanted to show someone. Just post it instead. It'll be a nice suprise for your mate, and shows that you're still thinking about them

In the mean time, it's not *that* long until Easter... think about what you can do when you're on hols then. If your mates are scattered around the country, perhaps start thinking about how you could all meet up somewhere in the middle for a weekend or something

As for the girly mates at uni... well, hmm... I spose you can pop along to the SU bar and just start up a conversation with someone that looks like someone friendly at the bar...? (Just don't make it look like you're chatting them up... unless you are )

Hope it works out matey, it's tough but hang in there
Hehe thanks
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leopard
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#28
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#28
~I'm actually excited about meeting all the diff types of ppl at uni, potential new friends etc. but i definitely wouldnt want to lose contact with my mates from high school---i think if ur close, you'll all make the effort to keep in touch i mean, i still hang out with several of my mates from primary school!! and since we're all starting at unis in Sydney in March, it will be easy to maintain the friendship....i hope!
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ToshTrent
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#29
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#29
(Original post by THE PROPHETOR!)
Hey guys...

This is quite a random post, but I was wondering, is anyone truely worried about losing their friends when they go to uni...

I was just watching american pie, and realised that in about 9 months, I will lose all my friends... But are they really that close?

Just a thought.

Jason
Na not bothered. Friendships fade, ah well.
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