Is not getting a happy birthday message during a break a bad sign?

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Anonymous #1
#1
Report Thread starter 1 month ago
#1
Hi hi,

So me and my longterm boyfriend (3 years) are currently on a break that started off as a breakup which I'd initiated. He got in touch with me the same night and asked if we could make it a break, and I had had time to cool off and calm down my anxiety from earlier, so said yes because it's genuinely what I want to do.

Our plan is to meet up next week to talk about things, which will make it 2.5 weeks that we've been on a break for. We agreed to have no contact to give each other space to think about things and work on ourselves, which has been really hard but I've managed so far.

Today is really hard though because it's my birthday, and this day is really difficult for me because I have some significant traumas associated with it. My bf knows about these and he's been incredible in the past, but now I haven't heard from him today and it's making me really anxious.

Do you guys think that not hearing from him is a bad sign? Or is he just being respectful of the space that I asked for 2 weeks ago?

Also if anyone has any tips for how to come back from a break, that would be very much appreciated!! We set a boundary of not sleeping with anyone else so that won't be an issue, but I'm not sure how the rest of it goes.
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ageshallnot
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#2
Report 1 month ago
#2
(Original post by Anonymous)
Hi hi,

So me and my longterm boyfriend (3 years) are currently on a break that started off as a breakup which I'd initiated. He got in touch with me the same night and asked if we could make it a break, and I had had time to cool off and calm down my anxiety from earlier, so said yes because it's genuinely what I want to do.

Our plan is to meet up next week to talk about things, which will make it 2.5 weeks that we've been on a break for. We agreed to have no contact to give each other space to think about things and work on ourselves, which has been really hard but I've managed so far.

Today is really hard though because it's my birthday, and this day is really difficult for me because I have some significant traumas associated with it. My bf knows about these and he's been incredible in the past, but now I haven't heard from him today and it's making me really anxious.

Do you guys think that not hearing from him is a bad sign? Or is he just being respectful of the space that I asked for 2 weeks ago?

Also if anyone has any tips for how to come back from a break, that would be very much appreciated!! We set a boundary of not sleeping with anyone else so that won't be an issue, but I'm not sure how the rest of it goes.
He's probably worried that if he breaks the terms of your agreement you might make the break permanent.
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baddielations
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#3
Report 4 weeks ago
#3
(Original post by Anonymous)
Hi hi,

So me and my longterm boyfriend (3 years) are currently on a break that started off as a breakup which I'd initiated. He got in touch with me the same night and asked if we could make it a break, and I had had time to cool off and calm down my anxiety from earlier, so said yes because it's genuinely what I want to do.

Our plan is to meet up next week to talk about things, which will make it 2.5 weeks that we've been on a break for. We agreed to have no contact to give each other space to think about things and work on ourselves, which has been really hard but I've managed so far.

Today is really hard though because it's my birthday, and this day is really difficult for me because I have some significant traumas associated with it. My bf knows about these and he's been incredible in the past, but now I haven't heard from him today and it's making me really anxious.

Do you guys think that not hearing from him is a bad sign? Or is he just being respectful of the space that I asked for 2 weeks ago?

Also if anyone has any tips for how to come back from a break, that would be very much appreciated!! We set a boundary of not sleeping with anyone else so that won't be an issue, but I'm not sure how the rest of it goes.
He's probably just respecting your terms of agreement but I still think he should've at least sent a message or checked up on you, maybe bring this up when u see him next and find out why he didn't contact you.
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zefter1234
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#4
Report 4 weeks ago
#4
(Original post by baddielations)
He's probably just respecting your terms of agreement but I still think he should've at least sent a message or checked up on you, maybe bring this up when u see him next and find out why he didn't contact you.
He didnt contact bcuz she literally told him not to. Why cant she just be clear whats with all these mixed msgs
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baddielations
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#5
Report 4 weeks ago
#5
(Original post by zefter1234)
He didnt contact bcuz she literally told him not to. Why cant she just be clear whats with all these mixed msgs
fair enough but I still see how she might've felt some typa way about it. But that's true, if she did strictly say no contact then it's no contact init, I guess you can't really fault him for not saying happy birthday
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