Make it More Vampire-ey !!

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the bear
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#1
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#1
So in the US& A the 26th of May is World Dracula Day :afraid:

Let us get our teeth into this challenging topic :rofl:

Soz NO ZOMBIES

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Reality Check Toki the Dumdum harrysbar The_Lonely_Goatherd Good bloke Muttley79 nulli tertius chazwomaqAndrew97 Plantagenet Crown Fullofsurprises LiberOfLondon ecolierlondonmyst Sammylou40GlazJoinedup uberteknikPhoenixfeather99AngryJellyfish laurawattwinterscomingBlue_Cow RedTwisttoonervoustotalk Deggs_14 HRobson_BMCSinnoh SaDe7RogerOxonAnonymous1502 DrewskiQuasaParacosm The Usherette™ lyer in hellfyreMidge Bang Udder OrderProducktiveOndeKarelinaGreyWolfTooDr CoxPhantom 1517Dan0101026Soapusername5264250FV75mqb2766cambioTobelstienCoolBroStereoKjekjeSkittishNappLaserquestAleshabecausethenightOberonflyLovelyFoxProxyBuckHowlsHalfeti RoseWoooordabsolutelysproutMoonboChoc fanGhostladyCoolestMacyAmeliaLyndseyROTLRsxgewSameeraClaudiaDaveoNeviBlackCatFlobroLaurenceAnonymous1502Guru JasonLego Men OnJoyfulGeekMarkovHardy_BtgHannaRufusSynergy~Medic WilVanessaCnightingalegendVersionsBecca216Mr WillyjellyRetreadicossummerberrychopinnocMesopotGolderzshortieTashFionaandDonkeymnotzetamfctinygirlBlueIndigoVioletTJ1997DaryaJoyAstraPhoenixRoseWannaCambioAsaYunoouser11235813cleanseBexKorrasmorrasajilemonadeteatreblebeefox houndbbyooserJolesJustaboutmeddadCute KawaiiImperatorFatinespinningtopjoey srpugglet HellllppppScarletMillionsSir Rutlandtimespentjackpotu_w_DSKEdacba_w_HALLOONMickeyM&SS&FProperladFFFMehvijRam RYeoAeshaMarkWise GTinyPizzahomecounterPStevensAmeliab2PRich PCkentReading MumKing LouiswaxerAzureWindChlaminmate4DopticsDentaldreamsjustvisitedSocraticNikkiBHM365nm12345Leafysealonestercote1ojhungrysalBraindraindjinnsterArtfultinyBenjiHedgeyJoshwoodsniamhblobfishRaptorJKA_Pcoco:)TriplexBarbedwirelessjessicaMnonIraDozyJosennthkoinoII1LMayhemTalkativeDQpenguingirlBookworm524kizarkitoAgashii_AestheticIncomeinanotherSufysaliaaG Quinn
Last edited by the bear; 1 month ago
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penguingirl18
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#2
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#2
Here comes the sun...

Garlic Brontë
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penguingirl18
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#3
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#3
A Streetcar Named Vampire
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the bear
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#4
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#4
(Original post by penguingirl18)
Here comes the sun...

Garlic Brontë
:rave: these are excellent pg !! :girl:

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bl0bf1sh
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#5
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#5
looking for akashka
sweet coraline
blood vibrations
summer bite city
gimme! gimme! gimme! (a man after mid-bite)
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meddad
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#6
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#6
I bet the stakes are high on this thread. You can Count on it.
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meddad
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#7
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#7
I normally just tell my dad jokes on these threads, but wonder if this one is more suited to Vlad jokes ?
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the bear
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#8
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#8
(Original post by penguingirl18)
A Streetcar Named Vampire
:rave: hehehe good one pg :girl:

the people of Vampa are lovin' it

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This place is situated in MBanza Congo, Zaire, Angola, its geographical coordinates are 6° 29' 0" South, 14° 20' 0" East


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Senhoras,
por favor, não aqueça seu Calulu nos radiadores do vestiário.
esta deliciosa caldeirada de peixe é irresistível para moscas e isso.
Logo os pássaros voam dentro de casa para se deleitar com os insetos.
Em pouco tempo é um pandemônio completo como os pássaros
brigam uns com os outros e atacam as cortinas com seus pés pontudos.
Só semana passada grande Nelinha a faxineira me disse
que um turaco de crista vermelha latiu em seu ouvido
esquerdo enquanto ela cochilava no mirante.
Por que não deixar seu Calulu na recepção quando chegar?
O Big Manoela tem um armário especial para aquecer todos
os tipos de pratos de peixe.

Demóstenes Amos Chilingutila

Subgerente Adjunto de aquecimento de pratos de peixe e que

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Ladies,
please do not warm your Calulu on the changing room radiators.
this delicious fish stew is irresistible to flies and that.
Soon the birds fly indoors to feast on the insects.
Before long it is complete pandemonium as the birds
tussle with each other and attack the curtains with their pointy feet.
Only last week big Nelinha the cleaning lady told me
that a red-crested turaco barked into her left ear as she dozed on the belvedere.
Why not leave your Calulu at reception when you arrive ?
Big Manoela has a special cupboard for warming all manner of fish dishes.

Demosthenes Amos Chilingutila

Deputy Assistant Manager of fish dish warming and that
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meddad
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#9
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#9
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the bear
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#10
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#10
(Original post by bl0bf1sh)
looking for akashka
sweet coraline
blood vibrations
summer bite city
gimme! gimme! gimme! (a man after mid-bite)
:rave: well played Your Ladyship :girl:

the last one made me spill my Bull's Blood :afraid:

the people of Vampa are clutching their sides

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Senhoras,
talvez você esteja tendo problemas
encontrar um cônjuge adequado para seu filho mais velho?
Pode ser um pesadelo completo,
especialmente se eles vieram na caravela feia,
ou se não forem a colhona mais afiada do arsenal.
Não se desespere !
Temos o prazer de lhe oferecer os serviços da grande Balbina off recepção.
Ela é uma casamenteira experiente que pode compartilhar
muitos depoimentos brilhantes de mamães aliviadas com você.
Big B não cobra muito e garante
reembolsar cada kwanza se o casamento falhar no prazo de três anos.

Almerindo Jaka Jamba

Subgerente Assistente de felicidade conjugal e que

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Ladies,
perhaps you are having trouble
finding a suitable spouse for your eldest child ?
It can be a complete nightmare,
especially if they came in on the ugly caravel,
or if they are not the sharpest colhona in the armoury.
Do not despair !
We are delighted to offer you the services of big Balbina off reception.
She is an experienced casamenteira who can share
many glowing testimonials from relieved Mums with you.
Big B does not charge very much, and guarantees
to refund every kwanza if the marriage fails within three years.

Almerindo Jaka Jamba

Deputy Assistant Manager of marital bliss and that
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the bear
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#11
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#11
(Original post by meddad)
I bet the stakes are high on this thread. You can Count on it.

I normally just tell my dad jokes on these threads, but wonder if this one is more suited to Vlad jokes ?

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:woo: very amusing ! :yay:

the people of Vampa are experiencing a magnitude 0.4 mirthquake :afraid:

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Cavalheiros,
Talvez você esteja preocupado com uma certa falta de equilíbrio
agora que sua juventude é uma memória distante?
Não se desespere ! A recepção da Big Efigênia
é uma consultora holística de morfologia corporal qualificada.
Ela pode compartilhar muitos depoimentos brilhantes
de caras satisfeitos de uma certa idade.
Big E não cobra uma quantia exorbitante por seus serviços incríveis.
Se você não puder tocar os dedos dos pés dentro de quatro semanas
após o início da terapia de mudança de vida, ela garante o reembolso de cada kwanza.

Henrique N'zita Tiago

Supervisor Assistente Adjunto de redução de peso e que

Spoiler:
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Gentlemen,
Perhaps you are worried at a certain lack of trimness
now that your youth is a distant memory ?
Do not despair ! Big Efigênia off reception is
a qualified holistic body morphology consultant.
She can share many glowing testimonials
from satisfied chaps of a certain age.
Big E does not charge an outrageous amount
for her amazing services.
If you cannot touch your toes within four weeks of starting
her life changing therapy she guarantees to refund every kwanza.

Henrique N'zita Tiago

Deputy Assistant Overseer of weight reduction and that
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Imperviousness
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#12
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#12
The Vampires Tale.
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iL1L
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#13
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#13
Bloody hell!
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Fullofsurprises
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#14
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#14
(Original post by meddad)
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Brother of Vlad the Imbiber.
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Fullofsurprises
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#15
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#15
The Cook, the Teeth, the Wife and her decaying Brother
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the bear
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#16
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#16
(Original post by Imperviousness)
The Vampires Tale.
:rave: welcome to the crypt of punnage Ma'am :girl:

please sew this handsome badge onto your TSR shroud:

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the bear
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#17
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#17
(Original post by Il1L)
Bloody hell!
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the bear
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#18
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#18
(Original post by Fullofsurprises)
Brother of Vlad the Imbiber Impala, the ruthless antelope.

The Cook, the Teeth, the Wife and her decaying Brother
:rave: good work Ma'am :girl:

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Joinedup
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#19
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#19
Fang you - Dido
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the bear
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#20
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#20
(Original post by Joinedup)
Fang you - Dido
:woo: nice one Sir J ! :ahee:

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