Head Boy Application

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ItsUnknown999
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#1
Report Thread starter 4 weeks ago
#1
Hello kind students,

Head Boy applications have opened up and I was wondering what you guys think of my application. I would appreciate any feedback.

Thanks





During my time at Secondary School, I have taken many leadership opportunities and numerous extra-curricular activities. My teachers have described me as a conscientious and motivated individual. I have always balanced my studying with extra-curricular activities to widen my range of skills and to attain useful experience. Participating in activities like The Duke of Edinburgh(DofE), where I had to get along with my team members and take turns in navigation, helped develop my group-work skills and The United Kingdom Maths Challenge, which allowed me to enhance my problem-solving skills. I have achieved both the Bronze and Silver Award in my DofE and I have attained Bronze in the Junior Maths Challenge and Silver in the Intermediate Maths Challenge. Dental work experience required me to talk with patients and to assist the reception which has helped strengthen my communication skills and confidence. I plan on continuing my extra-curricular activities to attain more relevant skills and to enhance my social experience with others.

I have always strived to achieve my academic potential by staying motivated and disciplined. I see myself as a self-driven pupil who can work with autonomy. I use study schedules and revision guides to aid my studying. My hard work can be seen in the grades that I have achieved. With patience and support from parents, family and teachers, and from commitment and determination, I achieved 11 A’s in my National 5’s, and in my prelims, I have attained all 7 A’s in my Highers. I will stay committed and motivated to achieve these same results in my final exams and achieve high in S6. I stay focused and show high levels of diligence and I am capable of prioritising my workload. I will maintain my conscientiousness to achieve my fullest academic potential to represent my Secondary School to a high level.

In addition to the seven Highers I was studying this year, I have regularly volunteered my time to support our school in many ways : I am a proud member of the eco-committee; charity committee; Rights Respecting Schools Committee ; the pupil leadership team ; and I am also a science ambassador. These roles required me to balance studying with extra-curricular activities, get along with groups of people and educate younger pupils. I was elected to be a prefect in S5 and also have experience as a pupil council member. These roles have helped strengthen my leadership skills, time-management skills, confidence, and work ethic. I am a proactive student who loves seeking out opportunities when they arise and will continue to do so in S6. I will try to be an inspiration to the younger students and encourage them to strive for excellence.

Due to Covid-19, there were not many duties assigned to prefects; however, an opportunity did arise to help out in the Parents’ Mental Health Wellbeing Event (PMHWE). During the PMHWE, I was able to confidently represent our school: guiding parent’s and carers to classrooms, informing parents about what events were happening that day and raising money by selling raffle tickets. Another duty assigned was to clean up after the S6 leavers’ event. These opportunities, as prefect, enhanced my organisation, communication, and teamwork skills. I am willing to help organise/plan/clean/assist parents or visitors in future events and I am ready to represent our school to the highest standards.

I was also appointed to represent the eco committee by speaking at year group assemblies (S1, S2 and S3) which has helped build my public speaking skills. As part of the Rights Respecting Schools Committee, I was selected to work on the activism toolkit(for the Gold Assessment Action Plan) and helped to create a PowerPoint as our first step, which we, as a group, then presented to the rest of the members. (The Gold Assessment Action Plan ,GAAP, is to help tackle key issues in the world. We chose to work on Racism and the Ukraine Crisis). Leading this group project required me to take time out of class and refine the GAAP (to be more comprehendible for the younger students) which has helped with my time management, analytical and critical thinking skills. I will speak at future assemblies to encourage the younger pupils to join our school committees and I am keen to continue working on these group projects which will help raise awareness for issues globally, in our school and in our wider community.

I was chosen to assist my Biology teacher to deliver a lesson on food sustainability to primary 7 pupils in a Primary school. I helped the young pupils by showing them which foods were more eco-friendly, helped them plant herbs and I couldn’t help but give them a short lesson on the carbon dioxide yeast experiment they had done! My trip to the primary school allowed me to build a good working relationship with the young students who felt I was very friendly and approachable. As a science ambassador there were various activities during Science Week, in which I helped in the majority of. I worked with S1 and S2 to assist them in building spaghetti towers and showcased a few experiments in which I had to display strong levels of maturity and enthusiasm. My experience with working with younger students has developed my compassion, patience and amiability. I am able to better understand the younger pupils which allows me to communicate better with them in order to help them or to teach them. I will show the same zeal next year and I am very keen on educating younger pupils on science.

As part of the charities Committee, I have experience with fundraising activities and philanthropy. Aiding in bake sales, raising money by little games such as guess the bears birthday and helping in the foodbank collection allowed me to appreciate charity works more and made me realize how crucial it is to help those less fortunate. I have a greater sense of respect for the people around me and I have further developed my empathy. I will use my sense of appreciation to continue aiding in charity activities/events to help continue our good cause
















________________________________________________
Last edited by ItsUnknown999; 4 weeks ago
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AzureCeleste
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#2
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#2
Would recommend editing this to remove personal details (the school and names of people) as it can make you identifiable on the internet (just change to say teachers name or school)
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ItsUnknown999
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#3
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Thank you very much, I had not noticed the personal details as this was meant to be specific as my own teacher were going to read it.
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AzureCeleste
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#4
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#4
(Original post by ItsUnknown999)
Thank you very much, I had not noticed the personal details as this was meant to be specific as my own teacher were going to read it.
I think it's fine to have the personal details- just don't post them on the internet, hence why I suggested putting them in italics for us to read it through. You can add them back in for the final version given to the school

I've skim read it. There are a couple of grammatical issues and one or two flow issues. Your first paragraph is set up to talk about showing your leadership skills and then extracurricular activities (fine cause those will overlap), but then you end the paragraph talking about dental work experience (seems a weird place to stick it as I wouldn't put it personally under either category mentioned at the beginning of the para).

Paragraph 5- there's a whole sentence in there which has been put in brackets- just seems a bit odd

The general content sounds fine to me though and you're talking about the right things- I'd recommend having a thorough read of it to identify some of the grammatical issues.
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ItsUnknown999
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#5
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#5
(Original post by AzureCeleste)
I think it's fine to have the personal details- just don't post them on the internet, hence why I suggested putting them in italics for us to read it through. You can add them back in for the final version given to the school

I've skim read it. There are a couple of grammatical issues and one or two flow issues. Your first paragraph is set up to talk about showing your leadership skills and then extracurricular activities (fine cause those will overlap), but then you end the paragraph talking about dental work experience (seems a weird place to stick it as I wouldn't put it personally under either category mentioned at the beginning of the para).

Paragraph 5- there's a whole sentence in there which has been put in brackets- just seems a bit odd

The general content sounds fine to me though and you're talking about the right things- I'd recommend having a thorough read of it to identify some of the grammatical issues.
Thanks for the feedback. My English teacher has corrected the grammar mistakes on my hard copy. I will fix them before submitting.

The sentence in bracket was to show what the Gold Action Assessment Plan was actually about. However, I think that can be added using parenthesis without it being it's own sentence.


The dental work experience was to show what I do outside of school.
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AzureCeleste
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#6
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#6
(Original post by ItsUnknown999)
Thanks for the feedback. My English teacher has corrected the grammar mistakes on my hard copy. I will fix them before submitting.

The sentence in bracket was to show what the Gold Action Assessment Plan was actually about. However, I think that can be added using parenthesis without it being it's own sentence.


The dental work experience was to show what I do outside of school.
There's nothing wrong with mentioning dental work experience- just doesn't really fit in the paragraph. I personally wouldn't call it an extra-curricular activity or it relating to leadership activities. It's a fine thing to mention but it may be that the 1st paragraph needs a bit of tweaking so it fits in better or to put it somewhere else.
This is just my opinion though
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Wired_1800
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#7
Report 4 weeks ago
#7
(Original post by ItsUnknown999)
Hello kind students,

Head Boy applications have opened up and I was wondering what you guys think of my application. I would appreciate any feedback.

Thanks





During my time at Secondary School, I have taken many leadership opportunities and numerous extra-curricular activities. My teachers have described me as a conscientious and motivated individual. I have always balanced my studying with extra-curricular activities to widen my range of skills and to attain useful experience. Participating in activities like The Duke of Edinburgh(DofE), where I had to get along with my team members and take turns in navigation, helped develop my group-work skills and The United Kingdom Maths Challenge, which allowed me to enhance my problem-solving skills. I have achieved both the Bronze and Silver Award in my DofE and I have attained Bronze in the Junior Maths Challenge and Silver in the Intermediate Maths Challenge. Dental work experience required me to talk with patients and to assist the reception which has helped strengthen my communication skills and confidence. I plan on continuing my extra-curricular activities to attain more relevant skills and to enhance my social experience with others.

I have always strived to achieve my academic potential by staying motivated and disciplined. I see myself as a self-driven pupil who can work with autonomy. I use study schedules and revision guides to aid my studying. My hard work can be seen in the grades that I have achieved. With patience and support from parents, family and teachers, and from commitment and determination, I achieved 11 A’s in my National 5’s, and in my prelims, I have attained all 7 A’s in my Highers. I will stay committed and motivated to achieve these same results in my final exams and achieve high in S6. I stay focused and show high levels of diligence and I am capable of prioritising my workload. I will maintain my conscientiousness to achieve my fullest academic potential to represent my Secondary School to a high level.

In addition to the seven Highers I was studying this year, I have regularly volunteered my time to support our school in many ways : I am a proud member of the eco-committee; charity committee; Rights Respecting Schools Committee ; the pupil leadership team ; and I am also a science ambassador. These roles required me to balance studying with extra-curricular activities, get along with groups of people and educate younger pupils. I was elected to be a prefect in S5 and also have experience as a pupil council member. These roles have helped strengthen my leadership skills, time-management skills, confidence, and work ethic. I am a proactive student who loves seeking out opportunities when they arise and will continue to do so in S6. I will try to be an inspiration to the younger students and encourage them to strive for excellence.

Due to Covid-19, there were not many duties assigned to prefects; however, an opportunity did arise to help out in the Parents’ Mental Health Wellbeing Event (PMHWE). During the PMHWE, I was able to confidently represent our school: guiding parent’s and carers to classrooms, informing parents about what events were happening that day and raising money by selling raffle tickets. Another duty assigned was to clean up after the S6 leavers’ event. These opportunities, as prefect, enhanced my organisation, communication, and teamwork skills. I am willing to help organise/plan/clean/assist parents or visitors in future events and I am ready to represent our school to the highest standards.

I was also appointed to represent the eco committee by speaking at year group assemblies (S1, S2 and S3) which has helped build my public speaking skills. As part of the Rights Respecting Schools Committee, I was selected to work on the activism toolkit(for the Gold Assessment Action Plan) and helped to create a PowerPoint as our first step, which we, as a group, then presented to the rest of the members. (The Gold Assessment Action Plan ,GAAP, is to help tackle key issues in the world. We chose to work on Racism and the Ukraine Crisis). Leading this group project required me to take time out of class and refine the GAAP (to be more comprehendible for the younger students) which has helped with my time management, analytical and critical thinking skills. I will speak at future assemblies to encourage the younger pupils to join our school committees and I am keen to continue working on these group projects which will help raise awareness for issues globally, in our school and in our wider community.

I was chosen to assist my Biology teacher to deliver a lesson on food sustainability to primary 7 pupils in a Primary school. I helped the young pupils by showing them which foods were more eco-friendly, helped them plant herbs and I couldn’t help but give them a short lesson on the carbon dioxide yeast experiment they had done! My trip to the primary school allowed me to build a good working relationship with the young students who felt I was very friendly and approachable. As a science ambassador there were various activities during Science Week, in which I helped in the majority of. I worked with S1 and S2 to assist them in building spaghetti towers and showcased a few experiments in which I had to display strong levels of maturity and enthusiasm. My experience with working with younger students has developed my compassion, patience and amiability. I am able to better understand the younger pupils which allows me to communicate better with them in order to help them or to teach them. I will show the same zeal next year and I am very keen on educating younger pupils on science.

As part of the charities Committee, I have experience with fundraising activities and philanthropy. Aiding in bake sales, raising money by little games such as guess the bears birthday and helping in the foodbank collection allowed me to appreciate charity works more and made me realize how crucial it is to help those less fortunate. I have a greater sense of respect for the people around me and I have further developed my empathy. I will use my sense of appreciation to continue aiding in charity activities/events to help continue our good cause
















________________________________________________
I skimmed through it. I think you should add some details about how you will help or serve your school and students. Talk about how you can introduce a Lunch-time mediation and self-care session or Friday Talks with local leaders or volunteering opportunities.

Also talk about how you will help the teachers by working with them to ensure discipline and good behaviour.
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