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    My boyfriend always drives as he don't trust me or his family's driving even though we are good drivers. Earlier he asked me to drive as his car was full. On the way back I had a tailgater at a speed camera, I was just under 40 and there were no signs saying whether is was 30 or 40 so I couldn't break in time and pulled over. He went mad saying I should have carried on but I don't see why I should be pressured - afterwards I realised it was 40 but I don't know his local roads. I dropped him off and he says I shouldn't be on the road if I can't drive. I didn't look at him when I drove off and cried at the fact he criticised my driving and I don't see why I should get a fine. I'm a good driver and have been driving for 6 years.

    He also criticised me last night when I refilled the washing up bowl and he doesn't get why I do it. He don't realise the water was red from tomato soup and I would just be washing crocks in dirty washing. I am annoyed cos someone who 'cares' about me thinks they can be nasty what will be like if we lived together or was married.
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    Obviously his behaviour is pretty unacceptable, but the key thing to note is that he might not realise that. Before you do anything too rash, make sure you talk to him and help him understand how it makes you feel.
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    did he actually have a go at you or was it just like an observation. It seems rediculous that anybody would have a go at people for things like that, are you sure you arent taking it a bit to serious? We cant really comment unless we know how it was said - however i cant see how anybody would be "nasty" when saying the dishwater was dirty.

    (can i ask how old you are?)
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    he sounds like he doesn't deserve you at all :mad:

    talk to him though, see what all this '******-ness' is about
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    It's pretty pathetic that you cried because your driving was criticised, you're probably quite weak willed - I'm guessing that's why you ut up with his ********. If someone 'went mad' at me I'd have kicked them out of the car right there at the side of the road. Next time he starts tell him to **** off and dump him on the spot.
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    It's pretty pathetic that you cried because your driving was criticised, you're probably quite weak willed - I'm guessing that's why you put up with his nonsense. If someone 'went mad' at me I'd have kicked them out of the car right there at the side of the road. Next time he starts tell him to **** off and dump him on the spot.
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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    My boyfriend always drives as he don't trust me or his family's driving even though we are good drivers. Earlier he asked me to drive as his car was full. On the way back I had a tailgater at a speed camera, I was just under 40 and there were no signs saying whether is was 30 or 40 so I couldn't break in time and pulled over. He went mad saying I should have carried on but I don't see why I should be pressured - afterwards I realised it was 40 but I don't know his local roads. I dropped him off and he says I shouldn't be on the road if I can't drive. I didn't look at him when I drove off and cried at the fact he criticised my driving and I don't see why I should get a fine. I'm a good driver and have been driving for 6 years.

    He also criticised me last night when I refilled the washing up bowl and he doesn't get why I do it. He don't realise the water was red from tomato soup and I would just be washing crocks in dirty washing. I am annoyed cos someone who 'cares' about me thinks they can be nasty what will be like if we lived together or was married.
    Was he just having a bad day? Or does he do this all the time?

    I know that sometimes I can be pretty *****y (especially at certain times of the month :p: ).

    Often if you're feeling a bit irritated, unfortunately it's the people closest to you (ie partners) that bear the brunt of it because those are the people you feel comfortable enough with to just let it out.

    Having said that, I try to apologise if I snap at someone.

    You should probably talk to him...there may be a reason behind his behaviour
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    (Original post by eulerwaswrong)
    did he actually have a go at you or was it just like an observation. It seems rediculous that anybody would have a go at people for things like that, are you sure you arent taking it a bit to serious? We cant really comment unless we know how it was said - however i cant see how anybody would be "nasty" when saying the dishwater was dirty.

    (can i ask how old you are?)
    We have been together 4 years and I am 24, I know its petty but its bad enough when those who aren't close are picky yet close ones should accept you for who you are.
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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    He also criticised me last night when I refilled the washing up bowl and he doesn't get why I do it. He don't realise the water was red from tomato soup and I would just be washing crocks in dirty washing.
    Sorry -- what?

    Depending which part of the world you're from, if you have been driving for 6 years that would make you roughly 23 years old assuming you started driving as soon as you legally could. That's around my age and I could never imagine having an argument about something this petty with my girlfriend. The whole issue with your boyfriend trying to control your driving is not unheard of but the last part just blew me away.

    How long have you been seeing each other?!
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    (Original post by junglemonkey)
    And why doesn't he trust your whole family's driving :confused:
    Its his family he don't trust and he don't trust his friend's driving either.
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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    My boyfriend always drives as he don't trust me or his family's driving even though we are good drivers. Earlier he asked me to drive as his car was full. On the way back I had a tailgater at a speed camera, I was just under 40 and there were no signs saying whether is was 30 or 40 so I couldn't break in time and pulled over. He went mad saying I should have carried on but I don't see why I should be pressured - afterwards I realised it was 40 but I don't know his local roads. I dropped him off and he says I shouldn't be on the road if I can't drive. I didn't look at him when I drove off and cried at the fact he criticised my driving and I don't see why I should get a fine. I'm a good driver and have been driving for 6 years.
    If you're unaware of the speed limit of a road you're on, and this is a fairly normal occurrence (that's the impression you certainly give), then you're quite simply not a good driver. I don't always obey the speedlimit, but at least I know what it is and make judgements based on it.

    Either way, if someone is behind you that doesn't mean you can't slow down. That's what brakelights are for.
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    Its the beginning of something more serious. I know because I was the same.

    I started to be like this with my girlfriend, because after a while I felt I had the right to. I wasn't happy with the way she did things so I always corrected her.

    This later grew into major control issues and it turned out I was trying to control her, but I didn't realize I was doing it.

    Nip it in the bud right now before it gets worse, because it will.

    I used to moan at silly things, about how much washing she put in the washing machine, or how much milk she put in her tea.

    It's very possible he don't know he is doing it, because I didn't. Talk to him and tell him how you feel. If he is nasty to you, and don't understand then leave.
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    The simple fact is.. if he makes you unhappy.. you should not be with him..

    If you cannot imagine a future.. and you want a long term relationship.. and you do not think he will change.. you should not be with him.

    Tell him that he is making you unhappy.. rather than telling us.. and see what his reaction is.. Over the next few days.. see if he changes.

    If he does not.. leave him!
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    Why are you with him if he's being like this? He seems as if he's big headed. I couldn't be with someone like that. I'd talk to him if I were you, and tell him it can't go on like this. If he loved you, he wouldn't be criticising you all the time. My boyfriend isn't like this with me, even if he was I'd tell him straight away that it's unacceptable. Are you frightened to talk to him because he's like this? Just wondering.
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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    I dropped him off and he says I shouldn't be on the road if I can't drive.
    That's a bit harsh.
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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    We have been together 4 years and I am 24, I know its petty but its bad enough when those who aren't close are picky yet close ones should accept you for who you are.
    i think you are taking this to seriously. Hes not picking flaws in you personally. And why do you care you wash dishes differently to him, hes just saying it. I say to lots of people they do something a bit odd - surely this would be a better way of doing it, it doesnt mean i hate them.

    No offence here either - but crying when someone tells you you did something wrong while driving.

    (again its hard to say without knowing how he said it - but i cant believe someone whould be nasty when telling them the dishwater was dirty/driving was poor)

    If it really is quite hurtful to you, stand up for yourself, tell him, he probably doesnt even realise that someone could be offended by what he said. Im sure he means no harm - talk to him about it - not tsr
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    (Original post by CatherineSmith)
    Why are you with him if he's being like this? He seems as if he's big headed. I couldn't be with someone like that. I'd talk to him if I were you, and tell him it can't go on like this. If he loved you, he wouldn't be criticising you all the time. My boyfriend isn't like this with me, even if he was I'd tell him straight away that it's unacceptable. Are you frightened to talk to him because he's like this? Just wondering.
    In the summer me and my friend were criticising the celebrities on the gossip pages for a laugh and he told us to stop - we were puzzled cos it was only a joke. He says he doesn't like moaning and things being done wrong yet his mom is the world's worst for this and he never says anything to her.
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    lol my bf is also starting to get like this..i only passed my test last week and he hasnt even passed his yt n he thinks he knows better..really annoying...he chnges my radio aswel without asking. i've told him though whilst im doing a favour for him ie driving him sumwhere he will not comment on my driving watsoever..this resulted in him refusing to give me directions cos hes petty like tht haha. my nan suggested kicking him out the car next time he chnges radio i think tht wud b funny.

    Anyway iv been with my bf 3 years, im only 17 but i think this situation is to due to the familiarity u hav with each other he has now got to a stage in ur relationship where he feels its ok to comment on or criticise u if he feels u arent doing sumthing right. so put him back in his place :-)
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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    In the summer me and my friend were criticising the celebrities on the gossip pages for a laugh and he told us to stop - we were puzzled cos it was only a joke. He says he doesn't like moaning and things being done wrong yet his mom is the world's worst for this and he never says anything to her.

    That's strange. Why does he moan if he doesn't like moaning? Is he frightened of his mum?
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    It depends also on the context of which it is said - sometimes my dad annoys the hell out of me by saying I don't do this, don't do that in similar ways (e.g. complaining about having to clean my room even when I have done it but he goes back to do it 'his way', etc..) although in my case it's just a typical parent thing I can tolerate, and perhaps it may be a case of something minor that you can tolerate, but if it becomes something more major, then it's something you should bear in mind.
 
 
 
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