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Am I being dramatic?

So I’m friends with this guy (let’s call him Jack) who has had feelings for me for the past few years, it was super awkward at first as I don’t see him that way but we kinda got over it. We don’t hang out alone tho always with other friends. My best friend (let’s call him Matt) is organising a surprise party for Jack and asked me to get him out of the house for a few hours. I said I didn’t want to as I’d feel uncomfortable being on my own with him and also I feel like me asking him to meet up alone would lead him on. Matt is now really angry at me calling me dramatic and to get over myself and now won’t talk to me. I said why can’t they get his other friends to take him out but he says I would be the best person?? So yeah am I being dramatic or am I being reasonable idk
Original post by Anonymous
So I’m friends with this guy (let’s call him Jack) who has had feelings for me for the past few years, it was super awkward at first as I don’t see him that way but we kinda got over it. We don’t hang out alone tho always with other friends. My best friend (let’s call him Matt) is organising a surprise party for Jack and asked me to get him out of the house for a few hours. I said I didn’t want to as I’d feel uncomfortable being on my own with him and also I feel like me asking him to meet up alone would lead him on. Matt is now really angry at me calling me dramatic and to get over myself and now won’t talk to me. I said why can’t they get his other friends to take him out but he says I would be the best person?? So yeah am I being dramatic or am I being reasonable idk

dramatic.
no this seems valid to me. if matt is managing to throw a whole party for jack then he must have other friends he can ask to occupy him for a few hours. you don't have to do anything you're uncomfortable with.
Original post by Anonymous
So I’m friends with this guy (let’s call him Jack) who has had feelings for me for the past few years, it was super awkward at first as I don’t see him that way but we kinda got over it. We don’t hang out alone tho always with other friends. My best friend (let’s call him Matt) is organising a surprise party for Jack and asked me to get him out of the house for a few hours. I said I didn’t want to as I’d feel uncomfortable being on my own with him and also I feel like me asking him to meet up alone would lead him on. Matt is now really angry at me calling me dramatic and to get over myself and now won’t talk to me. I said why can’t they get his other friends to take him out but he says I would be the best person?? So yeah am I being dramatic or am I being reasonable idk

I think you're being reasonable about this situation. You're being mature by telling Matt how you feel about Jack. Don't do anything that you feel uncomfortable with because it's not fair on you; standing up for yourself is the right thing to do. Matt really shouldn't get angry with you because what you are feeling is understandable. Like you said, he could ask another friend of Jack's to get him out of the house for a few hours or maybe a family member. Try not to beat yourself up in this situation. I'm sure Matt will come around eventually.
That’s not being dramatic at all. Your reasons make absolute sense. Matt on the other hand is overreacting..
You’re NOT being dramatic. These people who say you are clearly have an issue understanding boundaries, and respecting others.

We need to learn to listen to our gut instinct more often. You’re obviously feeling this way because something in your gut is telling you he isn’t safe even if there might not be much logic to back it up. Welcome to being a woman, this is how we feel around certain men and normally it’s because they actually don’t always have good intentions. Sure, he might not be a bad guy but too many people ignore their gut and end up in bad situations, myself included. Forget being polite if it means putting yourself in uncomfortable situations.

Please listen to your gut and make it clear you will not be alone with him because it makes you uncomfortable, don’t give in. If they have an issue with that then try and explain why but if they really don’t respect it then they don’t respect you or your boundaries.
(edited 1 year ago)
You are being reasonable. :smile:
Your best friend is not and may even have been asked to persuade you that it is fine to stay alone with Jack.
Always trust your gut instinct and listen to what your common sense is telling you.
Good luck!
Original post by londonmyst
You are being reasonable. :smile:
Your best friend is not and may even have been asked to persuade you that it is fine to stay alone with Jack.
Always trust your gut instinct and listen to what your common sense is telling you.
Good luck!


Yh I feel like Matt is doing it on purpose just to get them two alone
Both dramatic. It'll be a great party.

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