Abuse.

My mum's been physically/emotionally abusing me for about a year and a half, in many different ways and a few months ago, she threw me out and it got to the point where my school had to get involved. My deputy head was forced to ring Social Services, because she didn't know if I had somewhere safe to go that night but they let me go at the very last minute. It was a terrifying experience, all she could tell me was someone had reported it but it was confidential and I didn't want to get my mum into any trouble. I just had to sit there and hope they wouldn't cause a big scene, I hate all this drama.

Luckily, they let me go but they've still got it all on their records and it's all got worse now. I rang my dad in tears a few days ago and she told me the police were coming to see me about my behaviour, when infact when my dad rang them to see what was happening, she'd never called them and was using it as a threat to make me do things for her. She's told me she would chose her boyfriend over me anyday, that I'm the reason she's got no life/no money/her relationship isn't going well, tells me I'm a failure frequently, ugly, fat, turning into my older half sister (whom she hates and hasn't got off to a great start in her life), i'm dumb, stops me going to anything to do with friends and says I have no real friends. She says her life would be better if I wasn't here. She's also physically hurt me a few times.

My dad's set up a meeting with a social worker on Tuesday but I'm absolutely terrified. I don't want my mum to lose her job and upto a few years ago, she was a perfect mum and my dad really wasn't that great. It's kind of reversed, though there was never any abuse involved with my dad. I'm scared and I don't know what to do. I can't seem to stop myself crying every few minutes but I don't want to talk to people about it. It hurts alot even just writing this and I feel stupid. I'm a very sensitive person anyway so if she says I'm dumb one morning and I have an exam, if I can't answer a question instead of simply thinking 'I'll come back and see if I can do it at the end" I think "See, I am dumb". My grades are being incredibly badly affected and because I have no confidence, I'm losing friends. I feel forgotten, but I don't want a big deal and I don't want to have to move schools - which I'd have to if I lived with my dad. It also has to all be done legally because I'm fifteen and a half, not sixteen yet - so he'd have to gain parental rights and everything, it just isn't simple at all and the meeting on Tuesday has to be secret from my mum.

I'm really, really scared.

Reply 1

eclipse1473

Hey sweetie
what youre mom is doing is completely wrong.Noone should be made to feel this way and im glad your dad is there to support you, understandably you are scared but surely if you lived with your dad you would be happier.Some parents find it hard to show love and others are downright cruel, you are none of the things shes says you are she is saying it to make herself feel better.You have to speak up or this will all just continue , don't let her ruin your life ok.Hope the meeting goes well , take care.
x k

Reply 2

Anonymous #1

I don't want to get her into trouble.
She's been there for me my whole life and my dad hasn't.
It's only recently she's started this.
Why can't I just be normal?

My best friend doesn't care. Infact, when I told him and asked him if he'd come to the meeting to support me, he said he was going to the cinema and couldn't make it. I'm going to an abuse meeting with a social worker and he's too busy to support me for half an hour? :'(

Reply 3

rakata

You best friend sounds like a dick tbh! That's so, so insensitive. I have no idea what to say, but just be strong, at least your dad's around to make sure you're ok :smile:

Reply 4

Alexiscool

You sound bazaarly like someone I know :frown:

Your friend is a dick! doesnt just sound like one, Hope everything sorts itself out

Reply 5

Anonymous #1

I feel really silly for telling my best friend now though. I don't think he understands how serious this is. I was in tears and asked him to ring me and he was too busy to do that too.

I've got school tomorrow and I'm really scared. I'm really anxious too and feel sick. I just want this situation sorted, but I don't want to hurt anyone.