Is being fat the reason why I'm single?

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Anonymous #1
#1
Report Thread starter 1 week ago
#1
I'm a fat guy and I don't think a woman has ever expressed interest in me. When I tried to approach girls in the past, I was rejected.

I know people are gonna tell me to lose weight and all that but I have done so and then gained it back, lost it some of it again then put on even more etc. A yo-yo dieting history that I'm still struggling with. This is really common btw among fat people, not the only one at all.

Anyway, mainly interested in what other fat guys have to say who have been in a similar position...
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zuluwarrior7650
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#2
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#2
Dieting won't work for everyone. Try regular, non-intense exercises. Get a gym membership while you're at it and you might be in luck.
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Chicken.M.
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#3
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#3
I've been a bunch of different body types over the years from skinny to athletic/muscular to fat (not obese though).

Always got loads of attention from girls when I was skinny or muscular (like they approached me to flirt without me putting any effort in). Got no attention when I was fat lol.


Also you need to find a lifestyle you can stick to long term. Find a diet and exericise routine thats as easy as possible. Food that tastes good but is low calories and balanced overall (fat/protein/carbs wise), personally I eat ALOT of cabbage soups because it's virtually zero calories so I can eat a lot of it (and it tastes good so I look forward to it). And then I also eat a lot of omellettes (with tomatoes/onions/etc.) which is the protein part of the diet sorted. And those two meals form the basis which balances out the rest of my diet when I eat junk food, since junk food is mostly carbs and fat. Cus I eat a lot of cake as well.

And read the nutrition label of food you eat over the course of the day and try to keep the proportion of fat, protein and carbs roughly equal. And also keep track of the total amount of calories. You don't need to follow a specific diet if you're doing that. But having certain low calories dishes like the soup example that you can fall back on helps keep things consistent and makes life simple.

And then find easy exercises. Like for me recently I've been doing a hundred squats every other day because I can do them in my garden without leaving the house. And I've got a pullup bar + dip bars in my bedroom. So I can workout my whole body easily without leaving the house. Sometimes I'm too lazy to even go into the garage where the rest of my gym equipment is. But my dip bar is right next to my bed, and the pullup bar I can slot into any door frame. Makes it easier to get back on track if I fall off, which happened alot during the pandemic.
Last edited by Chicken.M.; 1 week ago
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Zarek
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#4
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#4
There is a lot of anti-overweight sentiments around so it’s not an advantage in dating. This said attractiveness is about many things and it’s not an absolute barrier. And let’s face it getting blown out is common. I noticed one of my newly divorced colleagues made an effort to lose weight until he was loved up again and then reverted to an easier to maintain weight. Dating is about playing to your strengths and working on weaknesses
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karenburton1305
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#5
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#5
I've found that changing smaller things gradually and working them into your routine is more likely to help - just because with diets it can be easy to fall off the wagon and get complacent. Hopefully you find the right person who will love you the way you come and support you to get healthier on your own terms! You'll get there
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username99721
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#6
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#6
probably icl, but dont develop an eating disorder over it, youre probably young so just focus on yourself for now *****es really aint worth it
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londonmyst
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#7
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#7
Probably amongst the main reasons.
Plenty of people are not sexually attracted to visibly overweight individuals or willing to date those who weigh a lot more than they do.
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Wannabevetnurse
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#8
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#8
(Original post by Anonymous)
I'm a fat guy and I don't think a woman has ever expressed interest in me. When I tried to approach girls in the past, I was rejected.

I know people are gonna tell me to lose weight and all that but I have done so and then gained it back, lost it some of it again then put on even more etc. A yo-yo dieting history that I'm still struggling with. This is really common btw among fat people, not the only one at all.

Anyway, mainly interested in what other fat guys have to say who have been in a similar position...
Define "fat".

While most women don't tend to go for men who are not in shape, or lean, it might not be the main reason. We do not know the reason behind your loss in dating.

My advice: go gym because you want to, be yourself and someone will eventually find you.

I am chubby, and I go gym because I enjoy the pain during days after I go gym. While I struggle to find girls, it's mostly due to my introverted nature. I have had some girls, but nothing more than 5 months or so
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karl pilkington
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#9
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#9
How fat are you like if you accidentally sat on an infant would bit be like manslaughter?
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ansh_2931
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#10
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#10
(Original post by Anonymous)
I'm a fat guy and I don't think a woman has ever expressed interest in me. When I tried to approach girls in the past, I was rejected.

I know people are gonna tell me to lose weight and all that but I have done so and then gained it back, lost it some of it again then put on even more etc. A yo-yo dieting history that I'm still struggling with. This is really common btw among fat people, not the only one at all.

Anyway, mainly interested in what other fat guys have to say who have been in a similar position...
Hi Mate, I lost 15kg in year 12 and gained it all back during year 13 so I'll talk you through the differences I felt:

I was so much more bright, confident and happy when I lost weight. I'm still happy now don't get me wrong, but back then my energy was completely different. I got a girlfriend during that time too as a result of it, and everyone would tell me I looked great.
After I gained it all back, I felt like I was just a shell of what I used to be: year 12 was my peak, and year 13 was a downhill from there.

So to answer the question I'm going to say yes and no. Yes, my weight was what kept me back. No, it was not because of how it made me look. It was because I felt so much better after losing it, I could look in the mirror and say "I made that and I'm proud of it".

Tl;Dr Being fat my personality was good but my look wasn't. Losing it made my looks better but my personality double so

EDIT: If you want me to talk you through how I did it, feel free to ask
Last edited by ansh_2931; 4 days ago
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xox416
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#11
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#11
I see chunky guys with girlfriends so maybe its just a you thing. Are you picky?
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