During freshers, I met this girl who is now in my friend group. We pulled in a club, and in a other nights afterwards. During that week, she came over to my place and things got a lot more intimate, but we didnt have sex.
Go 4 weeks down the line, things are still confused between us. We hang out late at night every few days, chat, cuddle, kiss, but no more. I suspect, nothing more is going to happen unless we get into a relationship of some sort.
But the problem begins here - she is undecided, and so am I (even though I suppose more keen than her). There is another guy who she has been friends with for a while who likes her, and even though she has told me that they are just friends, I think she might have feelings for him too. He clearly does - he phones her every day and sends her millions of texts. I, on the other hand send a couple of texts to spend some time with her.
So my question, if you were in my situation, what would you do. I have a feeling that she wants me to push things a bit, but she wont make the first move, as most girls never do. Normally, this wouldnt be a problem but, because I havnt tried to push anything since the first week, it might seem a bit out of character, so might be off putting. Also, the ''friends'' ***** things up for me - she is cool and I wouldnt mind having something fairly longterm with her, but she will obviously be undecided unless I make a serious move.
Any suggestions/help? This is making a mountain of a molehill... but honestly, this is the first time I am in such a situation. Normally, things happen quickly, and its all good. This big long drag is annoying me.
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Should I persue this, or call it quits? watch
- Thread Starter
- 10-11-2008 03:28
- 10-11-2008 09:10
Hm, try taking a shovel to your problem and downsizing that molehill. Look at it this way:
1. You obviously both like each other in some sense, even if it's just to boost your ego that you're getting something vaguely regular.
2. If she's ''just friends'' with the other guy, then I'd put that as being "just friends".
3. It's not 'out of character' to ask her out four weeks down the line. Just do it, but be prepared for any awkwardness.
To be quite honest, if I were in your situation, I'd go for it. Then again, I've ''gone for it'' in the past, and been turned down in some rather spectacular (and unspectacular) manners. You've got to take a few risks, just make sure if it all goes tits up and you get turned down that you still both remain friends - don't do a "me" and get awkward and bitter around them for a while before talking to them again...
- 10-11-2008 11:51
If I were you i'd take the risk and go for it, sooner rather than later.
And as the above poster said, if it does go wrong then what's the worse that could happen? Just ask to be friends and don't be too bitter.
- Thread Starter
- 10-11-2008 22:58
Alright then, I will ask her out and see if it pans out. Any other suggestions in the meanwhile?