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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    The thought of breaking up makes me really sad. It will break her heart, she's very sensitive and gets upset easily. This will make her cry for so long. Part of me wants to end it, part of me really doesn't.
    Don't make this all about her, what you want has got to be the priority. You knew when she first said no sex that it would bother you sometime down the line. now that time has come what are you going to do about it?
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    This girl is being incredibly cruel to you. Hard as it is, this is surely only going to keep getting worse unless you break up with her. It is difficult when you've been with someone for a long time to imagine being with someone else or even being without them, but if you leave her then in a year or so you'll be glad of it. To refuse even non-sexual affectionate physical contact is quite inhuman, and nobody should be expected to put up with that in a relationship. She may be upset, but fundamentally, it is her fault to choose to treat you like this - it may be for religious reasons, but that doesn't stop it being horrible. If someone loves a god you (presumably) don't believe in more than they love you, then there's not much hope for the relationship. It is an amazing testament to you that you've put up with it for this long.

    This probably won't seem like great consolation, but you'll meet plenty of other people in future and very likely you'll meet someone you're far better suited to than this girl.
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    (Original post by Ilora-Danon)
    Break up with her.
    Sex + love + friendship = adult relationship.
    No sex + love + friendship = childish friendship.


    I'm 22 and a virgin, but couldn't for one minute imagine being 16 months into a relationship with someone without having physical contact and/or sex.
    I think after 5-6 months of having sex/intimate contact that she's way way out of line to put the brakes on now. Are you sure there isn't something else going on? I just find it very strange how you can be okay with it for 5 months and then suddenly run in the opposite direction.
    I'd get rid tbh.
    Couldn't have sid it better myself.
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    Hahahahahahahaha
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    (Original post by Stu Laverty)
    Hahahahahahahaha
    very productive...
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    my dayys thts dark on u, i can see ur problem, nd like the guy above said without intimacy it ent a relationship

    personally, i wud break up wit her cus the relationship dusnt seem 2 b goin anywhere

    ur options are a) break up wit her, b) marry her or c) try 2 make a comprimise, bt u seem 2 rele like her.

    i wud say try talkin it out, nd make a comprimise cus marriage is a pretty big commitment.

    if shes still pretty sure on havin no intimacy, then i wud say tht u shud take a break 4 a bit, get all sexual frustation outta the way nd decide hw much u like her.

    Otherwise u can try waitin it out, bt tht wnt rele get u anywer. At the end of the day, a relationship goes 2 ways and if she feels like tht mayb u 2 ent right 4 eachother?

    i dno its pretty hard 2 say, otherwise u shud marry her, bt thts pretty big nd i reckon u shud think longgg and hard about the relationship before considerin tht.

    Remember, ther are plenty more fish in the sea, nd i wud advise tht u take a break if ur serious bout it nd then decide whether to break up wit her, wait it out or marry her
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    (Original post by Scribl_274)
    my dayys thts dark on u, i can see ur problem, nd like the guy above said without intimacy it ent a relationship

    personally, i wud break up wit her cus the relationship dusnt seem 2 b goin anywhere

    ur options are a) break up wit her, b) marry her or c) try 2 make a comprimise, bt u seem 2 rele like her.

    i wud say try talkin it out, nd make a comprimise cus marriage is a pretty big commitment.

    if shes still pretty sure on havin no intimacy, then i wud say tht u shud take a break 4 a bit, get all sexual frustation outta the way nd decide hw much u like her.

    Otherwise u can try waitin it out, bt tht wnt rele get u anywer. At the end of the day, a relationship goes 2 ways and if she feels like tht mayb u 2 ent right 4 eachother?

    i dno its pretty hard 2 say, otherwise u shud marry her, bt thts pretty big nd i reckon u shud think longgg and hard about the relationship before considerin tht.

    Remember, ther are plenty more fish in the sea, nd thts prolly wt i wud do
    that was painful to try and decipher.. on here.. we speak english.. not gibberish
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    Do you want to spend the rest of your life with her? Seriously, would you consider proposing? I don't mean today, tomorrow, next month or anything... just if you were to sit down and think about it, do you think you would?

    If the answer is yes you need to find a way to curb how you're feeling now... if the answer is a no or a probably not or anything, maybe you should think about finding someone you're more compatible with?

    I don't say this because I think you should propose so she'll sleep with you, but rather that she obviously only wants to do it with the guy who DOES propose. If that's not going to be you, maybe you're wasting both your time
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    She's getting it elsewhere.
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    (Original post by Dooze)
    She's getting it elsewhere.
    if she wanted it bad enough to be getting it from elsewhere, why not get it from your significant other too?
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    Ask if she would marry you.

    The problem is if shes young she may not want to.

    So if your sex drive is unbearable, u gotta leave her.
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    Get a bit on the side. :p:
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    (Original post by Ilora-Danon)
    Break up with her.
    Sex + love + friendship = adult relationship.
    No sex + love + friendship = childish friendship.
    So just because youre in a relationship and youre not having sex with eachother that makes it a "childish friendship"? You have no right to put such a label on someones relationship. Just because two people arent having sex it doesnt mean their relationship is any less adult than a relationship that is having sex. Its up to the individual couple and if I was personally in a relationship that you have described as "childish", I'd be highly pissed off and wonder where the hell you get off thinking you call tell people that their relationship is a mere "childish friendship".
    • #2
    #2

    My boyfriend and myself are in the same situation. Only, I just don't want to as opposed to not wanting to out of wedlock. I love him dearly but Have just gone off it, nothing to do with him- he was great.

    We have had the problem for over 6 months, and it has nearly ended us too. 2 suggestions;

    1.If you see each other all the time- don't, take some time a part to realise how much you love each other and hopefully re-ignite this passion. Living out of each others pockets so much so young (sorry to sound patronising) just doesn't give you a chance to grow as a person, and i feel subconsciously makes you resent each other.

    2. If you stay at each other's houses, turn off the DVD or playstation before bed time and give yourselves a chance to enjoy each other's company.

    I feel so horrible but can't change my body. I realise his frustration, and he too has put up with a lot but to quote 'can't live like a monk'. Hope you're okay.
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    (Original post by Ilora-Danon)
    Break up with her.
    Sex + love + friendship = adult relationship.
    No sex + love + friendship = childish friendship.
    As someone who has had several long term, meaningful but sex-less relationships, I find this really quite hurtful.
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    Christ died on the cross for this? :eek:
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    It's great that you respect her decision so much, but lets face it, it's not going to work if the two of you have such different views on sex and intimacy.
    Fair enough, if you love this girl enough to marry her, then go ahead with it, but if you feel you'd be happier breaking up with her and having a more equal relationship, then go for that.
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    (Original post by Spotty Dog)
    As someone who has had several long term, meaningful but sex-less relationships, I find this really quite hurtful.
    Read my above post.
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    ohhhh no, a hurtful comment by Violated Treason
    oh myyy bad for not writing clearly for you, maybe i just dont give a **** about what you think
    ..but let me put this as grammatically clear as possible....GET A LIFE, maybe you're just jealous of this breh cause at least he has one whilst you sat there analysing other people's posts..
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    (Original post by Spotty Dog)
    I find this really quite hurtful.
    Not helping yourself in making it look more than childish, unfortunately.
 
 
 
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