Yes, I'm Tee-Total. Deal With It. Watch

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King Hippo
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#1
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I don't drink alcohol. I don't have a problem with people drinking, I enjoy going on nights out, I even buy rounds sometimes. It just doesn't appeal to me. Yet some people seem to think this is a problem and take it upon themselves as their mission to "fix" me.

Today my new boss started and the "bigger" boss (who's in charge of him too) took the whole team (about 10 people) out for drinks. When we was getting a round I said I wanted a Coke and from that point on the "bigger" boss hassled me about it all night... despite the fact he's known for two and a half years that I've been tee-total.

At first it was just the odd joke... "go on, have a drink" and so on, but as the night went on he effectively kept hassling me and trying to convince me to do it... as if the fact I've managed to live 25 years without doing it suddenly didn't matter and that he could convince me to change my mind.

Here are some gems that I was treated to throughout the night (in front of my new boss, mind, who was laughing along):

"If I'd have known you didn't drink I wouldn't have hired you"

"Okay, so everyone wants another pint but not [me] because he's a complete homo"

"Why don't you drink? Is it because you're Scottish and it reminds you of when your dad used to beat up your mum?"

"Is your dad tee-total?"
"Yes"
"What, ever since "the incident"?" (there never was an incident)


The problem here is that someone higher up than me is leaving soon and I want to apply for his job, but the "bigger boss" and my new boss will probably be the ones doing the interviews. I don't want to feel that the fact I don't drink will hinder my progress in my career, but I can't help feeling that it will. And if I don't get the promotion then even though I won't be able to prove it, I'll always think that's why.

Incidentally:

1) Please don't say "get another job". This is my dream job and the one I went all the way through high school and uni doing.

2) Please don't tell me to just start drinking. This is a personal choice and I get enough friends trying to convince me to do it without (effective) strangers doing it too. Sorry if that sounds a bit dicky, I didn't mean it to. :o:

I suppose I don't really know what my point is... I just felt like telling it to someone because it really annoyed me and ruined my night. I feel like I've made a crap first impression on my new boss simply because I choose not to drink.

But I hate this unwritten social rule that if you don't drink there's something wrong with you. Who's the one with the real problem: the person who's having a perfectly good night not drinking, or the person who can't accept that?
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leum
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#2
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well sounds like you've already dealt with it, so why are you coming on here spoutin about it?
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ILILILILIL
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(Original post by King Hippo)
Who's the one with the real problem: the person who's having a perfectly good night not drinking, or the person who can't accept that?
That one!

It's a social thing to drink, you don't need to get drunk, just have a beer, vodka and coke, whatever.
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emilina
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i don't drink either OP!! :five:

my sister always had that problem where she use to work, everyone thought she was weird and boring coz she didn't drink. i wouldn't worry about it
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King Hippo
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(Original post by leum)
well sounds like you've already dealt with it, so why are you coming on here spoutin about it?
Well I clearly haven't dealt with it because it only just happened, it annoyed me, and it's affecting my feelings regarding the future of my career.
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ILILILILIL
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Also, you'll get the annoying
WHAT? HAVE A DRINK
GO ON
HAVE ONE

but eventually people just accept it and stop doing it. After about 5 or so nights out.
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scott8anthony
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(Original post by leum)
well sounds like you've already dealt with it, so why are you coming on here spoutin about it?
Er, yeah, what else can we say/suggest? We've already been told what not to suggest
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SuicideCommando
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Just get over the fact that they want to change you.
I'm tee-total, as well. And yeah, some people are like, "What on Earth?", but it makes me smug to explain I'm not like them.

Don't think you're better than people who do drink though. It's all about choice.
King Hippo
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(Original post by Rehehelly)
That one!

It's a social thing to drink, you don't need to get drunk, just have a beer, vodka and coke, whatever.
See, this is what I'm talking about.

What's wrong with me just having a coke? Why do I need to have vodka in it to suddenly become "social"? Last week we all went to a karaoke club in Soho and I ended up singing more than anyone else and making a complete arse of myself. But because I don't "have a beer" that makes me anti-social?
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Amanda
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I don't drink. It's never been that big of a deal to anyone..
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MichaelG
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You do the noble thing and ignore him and his comments. He is the work boss; fine. Only converse with him when you absolutely have to, otherwise pay no attention.
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King Hippo
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(Original post by SuicideCommando)
Don't think you're better than people who do drink though. It's all about choice.
I do agree with that. I never think I'm better than people who do drink: like I say, I buy rounds sometimes even though I don't drink. It's just something I don't fancy. Some people like cricket, I don't. Same thing.

But while I don't think I'm better than people who drink, the problem is people who don't think I'm as good as them because I don't.
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King Hippo
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(Original post by scott8anthony)
Er, yeah, what else can we say/suggest? We've already been told what not to suggest
I'm not asking for advice, otherwise I'd have posted this in H&R.

It's General Discussion, I just thought I'd tell people what happened to me today and see if they want to "discuss" it, in particular this viewpoint that people who don't drink are anti-social.
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3105
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(Original post by King Hippo)

"If I'd have known you didn't drink I wouldn't have hired you"

"Okay, so everyone wants another pint but not [me] because he's a complete homo"

"Why don't you drink? Is it because you're Scottish and it reminds you of when your dad used to beat up your mum?"

"Is your dad tee-total?"
"Yes"
"What, ever since "the incident"?" (there never was an incident)
I can't believe you let him say those things to you.
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mermania
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Most people are idiots when it comes to this issue.
I'm afraid that's all there is to it, and there's nothing you can do
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Prettyinpunk1
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You shouldn't start drinking if you don't want to just because you're boss makes a few jokes about you. He's only your boss afterall and what you do out of work is up to you and not him. Just let him think you're wierd, as long as you do your work fine then what does it matter. I'm pretty sure my managers think I'm strange but I just get on with my work lol. The fact that you don't drink should not affect whether you get the job or not. If it is brought up in the interview have a planned response . If you don't get the job then it may be due to other factors and not becasue you don't drink - there may be other people going for the job as well. Anyway lets hope you do get the job and good luck
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Clevergecko
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i don't drink. When im with friends they are just like, wtf and try and force me to drink too. It's soooooooo annoying, why cant people just deal with it? :P ergh. people
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leum
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(Original post by scott8anthony)
Er, yeah, what else can we say/suggest? We've already been told what not to suggest
what are you suggesting?
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King Hippo
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(Original post by 3105)
I can't believe you let him say those things to you.
Neither can I actually, I'm a bit annoyed at myself.

The problem is, if I complain about it to our HR department, that'll pretty much mess up any chances I have of promotion.
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there's too much love
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(Original post by emilina)
i don't drink either OP!! :five:

my sister always had that problem where she use to work, everyone thought she was weird and boring coz she didn't drink. i wouldn't worry about it
yet Dylan Moran is your display picture:p:
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