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    O and Gary10k casualty means when something is harmed or eradicated ps Autistic spectrum disorders often appear subtle.
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    Argh! I don't talk or socialist with 99.9% of the people on my course. I just find it awkward, and to be honest, I've nothing in common with them. As rude as it seems, I'd sooner end all conversations quickly then try and pad them out with 'How was your weekend?' and 'Doing anything nice tonight?'. Why should I bother, do they know me? Do they care? No. As far as I'm concerned, total silence on my part is better than those awkward little silences between meaningless chitter-chatter.

    I don't actually care how wasted they were last weekend, and it most certainly doesn't impress me. I don't want to hear about how tired they are because you were up all night playing video games. Student Union? What about it? I've not set foot in it! Yes, I will refuse every invitation I recieve because I just won't be comfortable being with them.

    If I want to be anti-social, I see no reason why not. Is my not speaking the end of the world? Nope. Will it ruin anyones life? Nope. People constantly trying to 'get to know me' just makes me want to bore eyes out with a spoon. I sit as far away from them as possible, avoid eye contact, and still they find some reason to talk. I'm not a mystery to be solved, I'm just a person that sees no need to talk.

    /rant
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    antisocial can be disruptive behaviour or someone who avoids other company. we're talking about the latter.
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    I like them, actually. Really like them.

    Perhaps they are autistic? But all the very, very reclusive people I've ever known become very intriguing to me, and seem to be interesting people on the inside. Unfortunately, I'm also cursed with new-acquaintance shyness, so find it hard to ever talk to them anyway.
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    (Original post by maxi321)
    Now we're mixing the two different types of anti-social up. lol
    There aren't two different types. There's unsocial and antisocial.
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    i hate group events or activities that involve "getting to know each other" why musyt i do that?

    i couldnt give a **** what wierd things people can do with their body.. i dont care if they have slept with 100 people, and i sure as hell dont care if they are tlking about being wasted at anytime.. great good for you, go and die early then, just let me get on with it
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    you can use unsocial and antisocial interchangably, providing you're not talking about disruptive behaviour.
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    (Original post by maxi321)
    antisocial can be disruptive behaviour or someone who avoids other company. we're talking about the latter.
    Wrong. There is only one 'type' of antisocial behaviour, and what we're talking about isn't it.
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    seriously there are 2 types, google it if you will.
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    (Original post by AnonyMatt)
    Wrong. There is only one 'type' of antisocial behaviour, and what we're talking about isn't it.
    No -- I'm afraid you're wrong. Antisocial behaviour can refer to both behaviour that goes against the customs/laws of a society and not being social.
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    (Original post by Clubber Lang)
    They are, but they are at least being friendly and offering them a chance to socialise
    And if they decide they don't want to you look on them negatively?
    Some people just don't want to. They like their own company for the most part, or have had bad experiences and just can't be bothered to deal with other people for a while (or ever, it's up to them really).

    I was like that once. Fed up with horrible people, knowing that there were nice ones out there, but couldn't be bothered. And not once did I need people to help me socialise, i.e. it wouldn't have helped if people were friendly and offered me a chance to socalise; I just didn't want to for a while. I liked my own company and the limited company of a few others (namely my family) and just needed time with my thoughts. If I had gone to uni straight from college the first time, I would have been like the people the OP described. I knew that I didn't want uni to be like that for me, so I waited until I was ready.
    When I was ready, I opened myself up to people mainly on my own (initially through the use of the internet) but, yes, also by being receptive when people spoke to me. So yeah, it's good and nice that people keep talking to the silent ones because you don't know when they'll be ready, but don't get affronted if they're not ready and don't respond well.
    There are still times when I really really need to be alone and I always make sure I have enough food in my room at Uni so I don't have to leave and face people if I don't want to. There have been at least 5 full weekends at Uni (I'm in 2nd Year) where I didn't leave my room at all and I don't feel worse off for it.
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    thank you jismith
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    Eskimojoe i think that sums the discussion up beautifully
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    (Original post by Gary10k)
    So you're saying its okay just to sit in your house or not do anything when everyone else in your course is out getting to know each other? It can't be all work and no play
    Of course it's ok. What's it to you what they do? If that's what they do it's up to them.
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    lol, I'm just stuck. I'm hardly in the mood to talk when in Uni. Combination of tiredness and I rather be getting work done than listening to how ammazing someone's life is.

    But when i want to chat to people, they refuse just because they think I don't talk. something werid. Never in the right time to chat I am.
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    (Original post by Gary10k)
    As i said above, not as if I am (or anyone else) is in their face all day trying to get them to talk. But I don't see the harm in trying to strike up a conversation with someone you're sitting beside when there is a break or between lecturers.
    And there's no harm in them giving monotonous answers. It's not as if they're telling you to **** off in response, is it?

    (Original post by Gary10k)
    Likewise, there is no point in being persistant with someone who doesn't want to get to know people. That's their choice. But is that how you should live your whole university life?
    I'm of the opinion that people should be able to live their lives how they want if it causes no harm to others directly or indirectly.

    (Original post by Gary10k)
    Also, say you were standing on your own. You may be a sociable, likable person, and Im sure you are. It would be a bit ****** if a group of people just assumed you were shy and thought to just "leave you too it"
    Talk to them then. If they don't reply, then leave them to it and don't 'hate' them. Give them another chance later (perhaps not the next immediate occasion where you see them) and repeat ad nauseam. You act as if striking up a conversation is the easiest, most normal thing in the world - if that's the case, it really shouldn't bother you having to start one time and time again with the same people. It should be a breeze. And if it isn't, if you recognise that in certain circumstances it can be hard, uncomfortable, unsatisfactory or even hurtful, you may understand why some people, due to their nature or due to their experiences are reluctant to ever get involved at all.
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    (Original post by fleur_de_haine)
    Argh! I don't talk or socialist with 99.9% of the people on my course. I just find it awkward, and to be honest, I've nothing in common with them. As rude as it seems, I'd sooner end all conversations quickly then try and pad them out with 'How was your weekend?' and 'Doing anything nice tonight?'. Why should I bother, do they know me? Do they care? No. As far as I'm concerned, total silence on my part is better than those awkward little silences between meaningless chitter-chatter.

    I don't actually care how wasted they were last weekend, and it most certainly doesn't impress me. I don't want to hear about how tired they are because you were up all night playing video games. Student Union? What about it? I've not set foot in it! Yes, I will refuse every invitation I recieve because I just won't be comfortable being with them.

    If I want to be anti-social, I see no reason why not. Is my not speaking the end of the world? Nope. Will it ruin anyones life? Nope. People constantly trying to 'get to know me' just makes me want to bore eyes out with a spoon. I sit as far away from them as possible, avoid eye contact, and still they find some reason to talk. I'm not a mystery to be solved, I'm just a person that sees no need to talk.

    /rant
    :hugs: 2,200+ posts though! There are people out there you probably can talk to then; it's just a lot harder to find them and control the conversations offline, right?
    I dunno, when there are so many places like TSR that you can talk about anything you want online and have more control with it, and you can keep your mind working and learn things and find out about people and open your heart out when you need to (anonymously even!) and have private conversations and even build up relationships, it sometimes seems there really is no point in making such effort to verbally talk to people.
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    just chat about the actual course rather than the peripheral nonsense. no way it can seem contrived then
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    (Original post by jismith1989)
    No -- I'm afraid you're wrong. Antisocial behaviour can refer to both behaviour that goes against the customs/laws of a society and not being social.
    When we're talking about the psychological aspect of either, it's wrong to say that an unsocial person is antisocial.
    I thought it was fair to assume that the OP was talking about a person who was psychologically unsocial, because it seemed that they had trouble being social, rather than just not wanting to.

    I didn't want to start this, but I saw the word mentioned in almost every post throughout the thread and I guess I just don't like being called antisocial, when I try my hardest to be social. :rolleyes:
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    (Original post by EskimoJo)
    :hugs: 2,200+ posts though! There are people out there you probably can talk to then; it's just a lot harder to find them and control the conversations offline, right?
    I dunno, when there are so many places like TSR that you can talk about anything you want online and have more control with it, and you can keep your mind working and learn things and find out about people and open your heart out when you need to (anonymously even!) and have private conversations and even build up relationships, it sometimes seems there really is no point in making such effort to verbally talk to people.
    Lol, it's easier to speak on the internet; I'm less conscious of myslelf and if I feel uncomfortable I can make people disapear with a few clicks.:yep: I guess my main problem is that I know how easily I can offend people. It's not that I mean to, but at times I come out with some of the most outrageous things before I think and it's just horrid. At least here I can read, re-read, edit etc. In real life I've far too many 'quirks' that'd just drive people mad. I can't get in an elevator with more than two other people, I don't to physical contact unless I've known you for a good long while and even then I'm hesitent, I change carriage every few stations on the tube etc. which would probably just lead people to thinking I'm crazy.

    I mean, I do speak to some people at uni. When I say speak to, I mean more that an awkward hello and perhaps I how are you. One guy I went to secondary school and sixth for with, and the other just seemed easy to talk to; a little crazy, but very easy to talk to. I used to speak to another guy at uni., I'll still say hellot o him in passing at all, but he's adopted the opinion that I'm 'beyond evil', which kind of ties in with what I said above.:cool:
 
 
 
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