Make it More Animal Disease-ey !!

Watch this thread
the bear
Badges: 20
Rep:
? You'll earn badges for being active around the site. Rep gems come when your posts are rated by other community members.
#1
Report Thread starter 1 month ago
#1
So in the US& A the 6th of July is World Zoonoses Day :moo:

Let us make some puns in sympathy with our animal friends :console:

Name:  nkotb.png
Views: 14
Size:  303.9 KB

Spoiler:
Show
Keds are an unpleasant tick which affect sheep
https://www.msdvetmanual.com/integum...ies/sheep-keds


Spoiler:
Show
Toki the Dumdum harrysbar The_Lonely_Goatherd Good bloke Muttley79 nulli tertius chazwomaqAndrew97 Plantagenet Crown Fullofsurprises LiberOfLondon ecolierlondonmyst Sammylou40GlazJoinedup uberteknikPhoenixfeather99AngryJellyfish laurawattwinterscomingBlue_Cow RedTwisttoonervoustotalk Deggs_14 HRobson_BMCSinnoh SaDe7RogerOxonAnonymous1502 DrewskiQuasaParacosm The Usherette™ lyer in hellfyreMidge Bang Udder OrderProducktiveOndeKarelinaGreyWolfTooDr CoxPhantom 1517Dan0101026Soapusername5264250FV75mqb2766cambioTobelstienCoolBroStereoKjekjeSkittishNappLaserquestAleshabecausethenightOberonflyLovelyFoxProxyBuckHowlsHalfeti RoseWoooordabsolutelysproutMoonboChoc fanGhostladyCoolestMacyAmeliaLyndseyROTLRsxgewSameeraClaudiaDaveoNeviBlackCatFlobroLaurenceAnonymous1502Guru JasonLego Men OnJoyfulGeekMarkovHardy_BtgHannaRufusSynergy~Medic WilVanessaCnightingalegendVersionsBecca216Mr WillyjellyRetreadicossummerberrychopinnocMesopotGolderzshortieTashFionaandDonkeymnotzetamfctinygirlBlueIndigoVioletTJ1997DaryaJoyAstraPhoenixRoseWannaCambioAsaYunoouser11235813cleanseBexKorrasmorrasajilemonadeteatreblebeefox houndbbyooserJolesJustaboutmeddadCute KawaiiImperatorFatinespinningtopjoey srpugglet HellllppppScarletMillionsSir Rutlandtimespentjackpotu_w_DSKEdacba_w_HALLOONMickeyM&SS&FProperladFFFMehvijRam RYeoAeshaMarkWise GTinyPizzahomecounterPStevensAmeliab2PRich PCkentReading MumKing LouiswaxerAzureWindChlaminmate4DopticsDentaldreamsjustvisitedSocraticNikkiBHM365nm12345Leafysealonestercote1ojhungrysalBraindraindjinnsterArtfultinyBenjiHedgeyJoshwoodsniamhblobfishRaptorJKA_Pcoco:)TriplexBarbedwirelessjessicaMnonIraDozyJosennthkoinoII1LMayhemTalkativeDQpenguingirlBookworm524kizarkitoAestheticIncomeinanotherSufysaliaaG QuinnImpervMeduseOJpaprikaCalliciousEVR
1
reply
iL1L
Badges: 20
Rep:
? You'll earn badges for being active around the site. Rep gems come when your posts are rated by other community members.
#2
Report 1 month ago
#2
Don't let this spread, please

You gotta be kedding me
Last edited by iL1L; 1 month ago
0
reply
Cote1
Badges: 20
Rep:
? You'll earn badges for being active around the site. Rep gems come when your posts are rated by other community members.
#3
Report 1 month ago
#3
Beauty And The Obesity
0
reply
ghostwalker
Badges: 17
? You'll earn badges for being active around the site. Rep gems come when your posts are rated by other community members.
#4
Report 1 month ago
#4
Foot(&Mouth)loose

One Bird Flu Over the Cuckoo's Nest.

The Goat Plague Dogs.
4
reply
penguingirl18
Badges: 22
Rep:
? You'll earn badges for being active around the site. Rep gems come when your posts are rated by other community members.
#5
Report 1 month ago
#5
(Original post by ghostwalker)
Foot(&Mouth)loose

One Bird Flu Over the Cuckoo's Nest.

The Goat Plague Dogs.
:rofl:
0
reply
Joinedup
Badges: 20
Rep:
? You'll earn badges for being active around the site. Rep gems come when your posts are rated by other community members.
#6
Report 1 month ago
#6
Pox the monkey - Peter Gabriel
1
reply
Joinedup
Badges: 20
Rep:
? You'll earn badges for being active around the site. Rep gems come when your posts are rated by other community members.
#7
Report 1 month ago
#7
Scrapie, scrapie give me your answer do...

World foot and mouth - Julian Cope
0
reply
penguingirl18
Badges: 22
Rep:
? You'll earn badges for being active around the site. Rep gems come when your posts are rated by other community members.
#8
Report 1 month ago
#8
Peter Rabid

Parsley, Sage, Rosemary and Lyme Disease

Catch Twenty-Flu

Revolution Swine-Flu - the Beatles

Had to consult Wikipedia for zoonoses. :yes:
1
reply
marchag
Badges: 13
Rep:
? You'll earn badges for being active around the site. Rep gems come when your posts are rated by other community members.
#9
Report 1 month ago
#9
Jimmy Hendra-x
Fat Botulism Girls
Tetanus-ee Titans (American Football Team)

And a wee ditty..
Supercalafragilistic Leptospiriosis,
Even though the sound of it is really Psittacosis,
If you say it loud enough you may get Brucellosis,
Supercalafragilistic Leptospiriosis
3
reply
the bear
Badges: 20
Rep:
? You'll earn badges for being active around the site. Rep gems come when your posts are rated by other community members.
#10
Report Thread starter 1 month ago
#10
(Original post by iL1L)
Don't let this spread, please

You gotta be kedding me
:rave: thank you so much iL1L :girl:

Name:  bike2.png
Views: 11
Size:  315.7 KB
0
reply
the bear
Badges: 20
Rep:
? You'll earn badges for being active around the site. Rep gems come when your posts are rated by other community members.
#11
Report Thread starter 1 month ago
#11
(Original post by Cote1)
Beauty And The Obesity
:rave: thank you Ma'am :girl:

Name:  bike.png
Views: 11
Size:  319.4 KB
0
reply
iL1L
Badges: 20
Rep:
? You'll earn badges for being active around the site. Rep gems come when your posts are rated by other community members.
#12
Report 1 month ago
#12
(Original post by the bear)
:rave: thank you so much iL1L :girl:

Name:  bike2.png
Views: 11
Size:  315.7 KB
prsom :lol:
0
reply
iL1L
Badges: 20
Rep:
? You'll earn badges for being active around the site. Rep gems come when your posts are rated by other community members.
#13
Report 1 month ago
#13
(Original post by the bear)
:rave: thank you Ma'am :girl:

Name:  bike.png
Views: 11
Size:  319.4 KB
You really need to watch out :rofl:
0
reply
penguingirl18
Badges: 22
Rep:
? You'll earn badges for being active around the site. Rep gems come when your posts are rated by other community members.
#14
Report 1 month ago
#14
(Original post by marchag)
And a wee ditty..
Supercalafragilistic Leptospiriosis,
Even though the sound of it is really Psittacosis,
If you say it loud enough you may get Brucellosis,
Supercalafragilistic Leptospiriosis
:adore:
0
reply
the bear
Badges: 20
Rep:
? You'll earn badges for being active around the site. Rep gems come when your posts are rated by other community members.
#15
Report Thread starter 1 month ago
#15
(Original post by Joinedup)
Pox the monkey - Peter Gabriel

Scrapie, scrapie give me your answer do...

World foot and mouth - Julian Cope
:woo: very contagious Sir J ! :ahee:

the people of Rabius are lovin' it

Spoiler:
Show
This place is situated in Graubunden, Ostschweiz, Switzerland, its geographical coordinates are 46° 42' 0" North, 8° 57' 0" East


Name:  br.png
Views: 9
Size:  225.9 KB

Herren,
morgen abend veranstalten wir unseren alljährlichen kuchenwettbewerb
im Freizeitzentrum Immanuel Kant.
Bitte bringen Sie nicht mehr als zwei Torten in voller Größe mit
oder ein halbes Dutzend Feenkuchen und so.
Der erste Preis ist eine Woche Urlaub in Luxemburg.
Der zweite Preis wird zwei Wochen dort sein.
Wenn Sie teilnehmen möchten, kommen Sie einfach an der Rezeption vorbei
und mit der großen Svenja plaudern.
Das Startgeld beträgt 3000000 Reichsmark und beinhaltet einen originellen Hut
mit Ihrem Namen und einer kleinen Tüte Gurken.
Alle Kuchen werden vom Organisationskomitee einbehalten
und zu gegebener Zeit an Bedürftige verteilt.

Gottfried Alexander Maximilian Walter Kurt Freiherr von Cramm

Deputy Assistant Commissioner für Kuchen und so

Spoiler:
Show
Gentlemen,
tomorrow evening we shall be holding our annual cake competition
at the Immanuel Kant leisure center .
Please bring along no more than two full size cakes
or half a dozen fairy cakes and that.
The first prize will be a week's holiday in Luxembourg.
The second prize will be two weeks there.
If you would like to take part just pop along to reception
and have a chat with big Svenja.
The entry fee is reichsmarks 3000000 which includes a novelty hat
with your name on and a small bag of pickles.
All cakes shall be retained by the organising committee
and distributed to the needy in due course.

Gottfried Alexander Maximilian Walter Kurt Freiherr von Cramm

Deputy Assistant Commissioner for cakes and that
0
reply
the bear
Badges: 20
Rep:
? You'll earn badges for being active around the site. Rep gems come when your posts are rated by other community members.
#16
Report Thread starter 1 month ago
#16
(Original post by ghostwalker)
Foot(&Mouth)loose

One Bird Flu Over the Cuckoo's Nest.

The Goat Plague Dogs.
:woo: nice to see you again Sir Goatie ! :ahee:

Name:  jacuzze.jpg
Views: 6
Size:  56.1 KB


the people of Rabius are spilling their Glühwein :afraid:

Name:  br.png
Views: 7
Size:  225.9 KB

Herren,
bitte erwärmen Sie Ihr Schnüsch nicht an den Umkleidekabinenheizkörpern.
Dieser leckere Gemüseeintopf ist unwiderstehlich für Fliegen und so.
Bald fliegen die Vögel ins Haus, um sich an den Insekten zu erfreuen.
Es dauert nicht lange, bis es ein komplettes Chaos wie bei den Vögeln gibt
raufen sich und attackieren mit ihren spitzen Füßen die Vorhänge.
Erst letzte Woche hat es mir die Putzfrau Big Inga erzählt
dass eine Bartmeise ihren Trinkhalm stahl, als sie auf dem Belvedere döste.
Warum geben Sie Ihr Schnüsch nicht gleich bei Ihrer Ankunft an der Rezeption ab?
Big Angelika hat einen speziellen Schrank zum Aufwärmen aller möglichen Gemüsegerichte.

Walther Heinrich Alfred Hermann von Brauchitsch

Stellvertretender stellvertretender Leiter des Aufwärmens von Fleischgerichten und so weiter

Spoiler:
Show
Gentlemen,
please do not warm your Schnüsch on the changing room radiators.
this delicious vegetable stew is irresistible to flies and that.
Soon the birds fly indoors to feast on the insects.
Before long it is complete pandemonium as the birds
tussle with each other and attack the curtains with their pointy feet.
Only last week big Inga the cleaning lady told me
that a bearded reedling stole her drinking straw as she dozed on the belvedere.
Why not leave your Schnüsch at reception when you arrive ?
Big Angelika has a special cupboard for warming all manner of vegetable dishes.

Walther Heinrich Alfred Hermann von Brauchitsch

Deputy Assistant Manager of meat dish warming and that
0
reply
Joinedup
Badges: 20
Rep:
? You'll earn badges for being active around the site. Rep gems come when your posts are rated by other community members.
#17
Report 1 month ago
#17
Tyzzer's - Wonderstuff + Vic Reeves
0
reply
CoolCavy
Badges: 20
Rep:
? You'll earn badges for being active around the site. Rep gems come when your posts are rated by other community members.
#18
Report 1 month ago
#18
SARs in their eyes
0
reply
the bear
Badges: 20
Rep:
? You'll earn badges for being active around the site. Rep gems come when your posts are rated by other community members.
#19
Report Thread starter 1 month ago
#19
(Original post by penguingirl18)
Peter Rabid

Parsley, Sage, Rosemary and Lyme Disease

Catch Twenty-Flu

Revolution Swine-Flu - the Beatles

Had to consult Wikipedia for zoonoses. :yes:
:rave: these will go viral Your Ladyship :rofl: :girl:

#1 & #2 are especially hilarious :congrats:

the people of Rabius are experiencing a magnitude 7.6 mirthquake :afraid:

Name:  br.png
Views: 8
Size:  225.9 KB

Damen,
Vielleicht gibst du zu viel aus
auf Ihr tägliches Gesundheits- und Schönheitsprogramm ?
Kosmetik und das kann eine große Belastung für Ihren Geldbeutel sein.
Die Dame von heute braucht eine praktische Lösung!
Einfach an der Rezeption vorbeikommen und mit der großen Renate plaudern.
Ihre Familie stellt Schönheitsprodukte her
aus natürlichen Zutaten seit Generationen.
Eines ihrer beliebtesten Produkte ist das Weißbier Colonic.
Es kostet nur 5.555.000 Reichsmark für zwei.
Warum nicht einen Freund mitbringen?
Wenn Sie nicht begeistert sind, garantiert Big R eine Rückerstattung
der ganze Preis keine Fragen gestellt.

Carl Ulrich Ernst Paul Anders

Stellvertretender stellvertretender Manager für Schönheitsprodukte und so weiter

Spoiler:
Show
Ladies,
Perhaps you are spending too much
on your daily health &beauty regime ?
Cosmetics and that can be a huge drain on your purse.
Today's lady needs a practical solution !
Just pop along to reception and have a chat with big Renate .
Her family has been making beauty products
from natural ingredients for generations.
One of her most popular items is the wheat beer colonic.
It only costs reichsmarks 5 555 000 for two.
Why not bring a friend along ?
If you are not delighted big R guarantees to refund
the whole price no questions asked.

Carl Ulrich Ernst Paul Anders

Deputy Assistant Manager of beauty products and that
0
reply
the bear
Badges: 20
Rep:
? You'll earn badges for being active around the site. Rep gems come when your posts are rated by other community members.
#20
Report Thread starter 1 month ago
#20
(Original post by marchag)
Jimmy Hendra-x
Fat Botulism Girls
Tetanus-ee Titans (American Football Team)

And a wee ditty..
Supercalafragilistic Leptospiriosis,
Even though the sound of it is really Psittacosis,
If you say it loud enough you may get Brucellosis,
Supercalafragilistic Leptospiriosis
:woo: um diddle diddle diddle um diddle ah.... ermm well played Sir March ! :ahee:

the people of Rabius adore your poem

Name:  br.png
Views: 5
Size:  225.9 KB

Herren,
Vielleicht sind Ihre Locken nicht mehr so üppig wie in den Vorjahren?
Es ist ein häufiges Problem und nichts, wofür man sich schämen müsste.
Wahrscheinlich haben Sie schon verschiedene Lösungen ohne Erfolg ausprobiert.
Wir freuen uns, Ihnen die Dienstleistungen von Big Emmi Off-Empfang anbieten zu können.
Ihre Familie behandelt Kahlköpfigkeit und das seit Generationen
mit ihrer speziell formulierten Geheimzubereitung.
Die Zutaten sind komplett natürlich und beinhalten
Leberwurst, Wildschweinborsten und Pflaumensaft.
Big E verlangt nicht viel und garantiert jede Reichsmark zu erstatten
wenn Ihr Bonce nicht innerhalb von drei Monaten dicht mit Stroh gedeckt ist.

Erpo Freiherr von Bodenhausen

Deputy Assistant Manager of Hair und so

Spoiler:
Show
Gentlemen,
Perhaps your locks are not as luxuriant as in previous years ?
It is a common problem and nothing to be ashamed of.
You have probably tried various solutions without success.
We are delighted to offer you the services of big Emmi off reception.
Her family has been treating baldness and that for generations
with their specially formulated secret preparation.
The ingredients are completely natural and include liver sausage,
wild boar bristles and plum juice.
Big E does not charge very much, and guarantees to refund every reichsmark
if your bonce is not densely thatched within three months.

Erpo Freiherr von Bodenhausen

Deputy Assistant Manager of hair and that
0
reply
X

Quick Reply

Attached files
Write a reply...
Reply
new posts
Back
to top
Latest

Do you know what you'll do if you don't get the grades you're hoping for?

Find something else in clearing (42)
28.77%
Take a gap year (23)
15.75%
Resit my exams (40)
27.4%
Look for alternate pathways to the career I want (19)
13.01%
I don't know yet (16)
10.96%
Something else (tell us in the thread) (6)
4.11%

Watched Threads

View All