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    (Original post by Alex L)
    There's nothing more precious than any child
    well quite - but on a personal level I mean...surely to any parent, their own child is the most precious thing in the world.

    So for his own mother......
    ...well it's just awful.
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    (Original post by PinkMobilePhone)
    well quite - but on a personal level I mean...surely to any parent, their own child is the most precious thing in the world.

    So for his own mother......
    ...well it's just awful.
    From your point of view yeh, your own two are obviously going to mean more to you than other children.

    But that's the thinking of a rational person. The mother must be mentally ill, there's no other comprehensible reason.
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    I don't think the mother or boyfriend harmed it "just because"

    A baby can be extremely frustrating sometimes when it is crying, and these **** probably took their anger out on it.

    I am not saying this makes them any less inhuman, they are still complete *****
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    The people who did that are ******* sick.
    They're not human.
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    (Original post by conormacklin)
    I don't think the mother or boyfriend harmed it "just because"

    A baby can be extremely frustrating sometimes when it is crying, and these **** probably took their anger out on it.

    I am not saying this makes them any less inhuman, they are still complete *****
    He was 17 months old, not a newborn. They can usually walk and say a few words. When they are crying, you tend to know WHY they are crying at this age, it's not like when they are very small and they often seem to cry inconsolably for hours on end, especially if they have colic. If he was crying it would have had a logical explanation for it, which could be sorted out without resorting to violence. Perhaps he was hungry, thirsty, tired, wanting to be picked up....you know, very easily solvable problems.
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    (Original post by PinkMobilePhone)
    He was 17 months old, not a newborn. They can usually walk and say a few words. When they are crying, you tend to know WHY they are crying at this age, it's not like when they are very small and they often seem to cry inconsolably for hours on end, especially if they have colic. If he was crying it would have had a logical explanation for it, which could be sorted out without resorting to violence. Perhaps he was hungry, thirsty, tired, wanting to be picked up....you know, very easily solvable problems.
    Some "older" children go through periods where they cry for no real reason, and the only way to deal with this is controlled crying. Still doesn't even come close to a reason/excuse though
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    I read through the whole thing, and I'm devastated by it. Struggled to get past reading about the various injuries...poor child.
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    (Original post by Alex L)
    Some "older" children go through periods where they cry for no real reason, and the only way to deal with this is controlled crying. Still doesn't even come close to a reason/excuse though
    Or you could deal with it by comforting the child.
    Controlled crying is not the 'only way to deal with it'.

    Besides I don't think that's true, that they cry for 'no real reason'. There is always a reason for crying. Even when they are very little, there is always a reason for crying. It's just that it's harder to determine the reason.

    A contented child does not cry. If they are crying, there is a reason. It may not be anything you can do much about (colic, teething pains, etc.), or it may be something where you do choose to do controlled crying (getting them to sleep without being held for example), but I really feel there's always some reason for crying.
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    (Original post by PinkMobilePhone)
    Or you could deal with it by comforting the child.
    Controlled crying is not the 'only way to deal with it'.

    Besides I don't think that's true, that they cry for 'no real reason'. There is always a reason for crying. Even when they are very little, there is always a reason for crying. It's just that it's harder to determine the reason.

    A contented child does not cry. If they are crying, there is a reason. It may not be anything you can do much about (colic, teething pains, etc.), or it may be something where you do choose to do controlled crying (getting them to sleep without being held for example), but I really feel there's always some reason for crying.
    Sometimes controlled crying is the only option left to the parents. We had a child at work whose parents had almost burned their house down because they both fell asleep whilst cooking, and slept through subsequent smoke alarms, all because they hadn't slept at all for about a week. Having tried everything else, controlled crying was the only way left for them to deal with it. Leaving it any longer would have been detrimental to the health of both them and their child.
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    (Original post by Alex L)
    Sometimes controlled crying is the only option left to the parents. We had a child at work whose parents had almost burned their house down because they both fell asleep whilst cooking, and slept through subsequent smoke alarms, all because they hadn't slept at all for about a week. Having tried everything else, controlled crying was the only way left for them to deal with it. Leaving it any longer would have been detrimental to the health of both them and their child.
    Yes, sometimes controlled crying can work and is probably recommended, I'm not denying that.

    But in your last post, you implied that controlled crying is the only solution for ALL situations, and it's not.

    In the above situation it sounds like they had exhausted all other possibilities, but for other children, comforting them is better. All children are different.

    Anyway we're getting off track lol
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    (Original post by PinkMobilePhone)
    Yes, sometimes controlled crying can work and is probably recommended, I'm not denying that.

    But in your last post, you implied that controlled crying is the only solution for ALL situations, and it's not.

    In the above situation it sounds like they had exhausted all other possibilities, but for other children, comforting them is better. All children are different.

    Anyway we're getting off track lol
    Yeh, just re-read that, my bad :o:. Was meant to say that it gets to the point where [...]. Obviously comforting is the first thing to try.
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    Sorry, but why are the doctors' and social workers' etc names revealed but the mother and the man she was living with are allowed to remain hidden? This could potentially ruin these people's careers and there's still a possibility they're not directly to blame, but the mother and this dude who are almost certainly to blame get to keep their identity secret?

    I'm reluctant to heap a lot of blame on the mother. It seems weird that she willingly took him to doctors/hospital etc. if she was abusing him. I'm guessing she might have been under a lot of pressure from the guy to keep the abuse quiet, but still wanted her son to be seen by someone. I dunno. This whole situation is horrible.
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    (Original post by PinkMobilePhone)
    Or you could deal with it by comforting the child.
    Controlled crying is not the 'only way to deal with it'.

    Besides I don't think that's true, that they cry for 'no real reason'. There is always a reason for crying. Even when they are very little, there is always a reason for crying. It's just that it's harder to determine the reason.

    A contented child does not cry. If they are crying, there is a reason. It may not be anything you can do much about (colic, teething pains, etc.), or it may be something where you do choose to do controlled crying (getting them to sleep without being held for example), but I really feel there's always some reason for crying.
    Very good post, I'd rep you if I hadn't given it out today already.

    I simply cannot stand people who say "kids cry all the time for no reason". That is not true and I think you can tell by comparing the children of good parents and bad parents. Saying that kids are just inconsolable is a horrid excuse that no parent should use. I don't think any parent ever needs to give up and start ignoring their own child.
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    i think they abused him cuz they got a kick out of it. they are evil.
    i do worry about usually unintelligent chavs who have kids tho.


    i see chav parents being mean to their kids all the time, like obv not to this extent, but you seem constantly stressin out n shoutin at their kids and smackin them and thats in public so u wonder what its like at home. i just feel sorry for them cuz they arent treated like a human being. parents use their anger n take it out on them.
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    The mum was said to be of sub-normal intelligence and didn't live in reality. Like she gave a crap about that poor kid, she allegedly just devoted all her time to her boyfriend. I think you should have to pass an exam to have a child these days.
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    I think the problem lies in this terrible loophole of an age interval (after health-visitor and before starting school) where any child can be potentially unseen for weeks or years and therefore nothing is detected.

    This is where I think action needs to be taken. There is something very dodgy about any parent being able to have a child who then isn't seen for many months during the most vulnerable period of its life.
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    (Original post by Adhsur)
    I think the problem lies in this terrible loophole of an age interval (after health-visitor and before starting school) where any child can be potentially unseen for weeks or years and therefore nothing is detected.
    I don't even think it's that. The child wasn't missed because of this loophole, he was seen 60 times. 60 times and yet the relevant workers still didn't think he was in enough danger to be taken out of that environment. The paediatricians saw the child's bruises several times a medical report suggesting they were non-accidental. Why was the child still with the parents after that? On one visit, the paediatrician somehow failed to notice that the child's back was broken. He should be sacked for Heaven's such, for such incompetence.

    Incompetence & negligence of individuals, and not the system, is what caused this.
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    (Original post by Adhsur)
    I think the problem lies in this terrible loophole of an age interval (after health-visitor and before starting school) where any child can be potentially unseen for weeks or years and therefore nothing is detected.

    This is where I think action needs to be taken. There is something very dodgy about any parent being able to have a child who then isn't seen for many months during the most vulnerable period of its life.
    yeah maybe if we put cameras in every house incase everyone is a rapist/murderer
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    (Original post by Adhsur)
    You're so obsessed with diagnosing yourself all the time. No one cares.
    no im not, and also shut up.
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    I can never understand why people like that even want children in the first place.
 
 
 
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