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Girlfriend doesnt like me watching porn (or ******* at all for that matter) watch

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    Why not tell her that whenever you w**k you think about her?
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    (Original post by Rainbows24)
    i kind of understand where she is coming from because it is like you are saying she is not enough for you

    :suith:
    :rofl: nice logic :rolleyes:
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    (Original post by kklol)
    on the contrary, i'd say any man who doesn't break up with a girl who has asked him to stop behaving like a man is stupid.

    no man can survive without *******. i know women dont understand this but it is true. and she either accepts that or OP is being deceived by a feminist lesbian with no interest in men
    but i dont see why he feels the need to tell her that he watches all this porn, (fair play, guys do) and then tell her he has a good **** over it, he could just say that every now and again he does it to porn and most of the time its over her. sorted, everyones happy, hes not lying, just twisting. Which is okay if she doesnt get hurt x
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    (Original post by Fjarskafinn)
    I have my Prince Charming. And we watch porn together when we're bored. Plus, if he tells me "I'm bored" on MSN, I'll suggest porn and he'll say "Aha, good idea".

    It's perfect.
    great stuff i was begininning to think only my gf was like this. good for you and i wish more women were as secure in themselves as you. the insecurity of the majority of women is precisely why men often leave them. cheers for bucking the trend and you bf will be with you a long time. i can assure you
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    (Original post by lolage)
    but i dont see why he feels the need to tell her that he watches all this porn, (fair play, guys do) and then tell her he has a good **** over it, he could just say that every now and again he does it to porn and most of the time its over her. sorted, everyones happy, hes not lying, just twisting. Which is okay if she doesnt get hurt x
    NOTE TO MEN: It is okay for you to lie to your woman and/or twist the truth behind her back as long as she never finds out.

    or you could just tell her the truth. it hurts sometimes but that's her problem for beiing an insecure cow, not yours. if you were lying you'd be shot down by the same women defending her anyway.

    birds, cant live with em, cant live without em
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    i feel like a bloke or im like sex mad... i cant remember the last time my bloke masturbated. he cant keep up with me lol!!... he didnt used to watch porn.. nor did i. but recently ive watched it a lot! its great! and we watch it together all the time! and make your own lol
    i feel for you OP really i do.. onlt coz its the other way round for me... hes a normal bloke i just think i have a high sex drive... so i watch it a lot
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    (Original post by Advanced Subsidiary)
    lol.. all the girls are in defence of his girlfriend.
    we arent all in defence of his girlfriend, I dont see the problem with him looking at porn it could be alot worse he could be cheating
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    Wonder how many of the girls who are against porn/masturbating never do one or the other themselves in a relationship?
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    (Original post by kklol)
    NOTE TO MEN: It is okay for you to lie to your woman and/or twist the truth behind her back as long as she never finds out.

    or you could just tell her the truth. it hurts sometimes but that's her problem for beiing an insecure cow, not yours. if you were lying you'd be shot down by the same women defending her anyway.

    birds, cant live with em, cant live without em
    i never meant that! im just saying that basically rubbing it in her face that he watchs some swedish chick get anal and has a **** over it, probs isnt the best way to get anything off her so he's probs be ******* for a long time without her....
    guys dont understand that the girl isnt insecure it's just not nice at all to tell her and why does she need to know ur ******* habbits anyways? girls assume u do it, all guys do, end of, why do u need to tell her the deatils?
    xx
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    (Original post by kklol)
    hardly instills a faith in birds does it mate?

    domineering creatures
    :confused: I didn't agree with her!
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    (Original post by lolage)
    i never meant that! im just saying that basically rubbing it in her face that he watchs some swedish chick get anal and has a **** over it, probs isnt the best way to get anything off her so he's probs be ******* for a long time without her....
    guys dont understand that the girl isnt insecure it's just not nice at all to tell her and why does she need to know ur ******* habbits anyways? girls assume u do it, all guys do, end of, why do u need to tell her the deatils?
    xx
    although, as i made clear, my gf is very cool with all this, when we first got together i didnt know because i didnt know her as well. Anyway, when i first told her i watched porn it was because i loved her and couldnt face doing anything behind her back. My intentions were not at all sinister. And unlike you i am male so i think my input here is pretty accurate.

    not all blokes are evil cheats waiting to happen you know. we dont set out to hurt you. but so,etimes with u girls it feels like us lads cant do right for doing wrong. treading on eggshells springs to mind.

    advice to you is to, if u have a bf, not be hurt if he watches much porn. ull last much longer that way as well
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    (Original post by lolage)
    i never meant that! im just saying that basically rubbing it in her face that he watchs some swedish chick get anal and has a **** over it, probs isnt the best way to get anything off her so he's probs be ******* for a long time without her....
    guys dont understand that the girl isnt insecure it's just not nice at all to tell her and why does she need to know ur ******* habbits anyways? girls assume u do it, all guys do, end of, why do u need to tell her the deatils?
    xx
    If that is directed at me, how about stop being so presumptious?

    I never just randomly said it to her. She ASKS me. Whenever I take longer than usual to come during sex she will ask what i've been up to recently.

    Why on earth would i just "rub it in her face"?

    Anyway i am her first proper boyfriend, maybe this affects it? How do i convince her i am not 'lusting' after these other women and that she shouldnt feel insecure?
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    (Original post by kklol)
    although, as i made clear, my gf is very cool with all this, when we first got together i didnt know because i didnt know her as well. Anyway, when i first told her i watched porn it was because i loved her and couldnt face doing anything behind her back. My intentions were not at all sinister. And unlike you i am male so i think my input here is pretty accurate.

    not all blokes are evil cheats waiting to happen you know. we dont set out to hurt you. but so,etimes with u girls it feels like us lads cant do right for doing wrong. treading on eggshells springs to mind.

    advice to you is to, if u have a bf, not be hurt if he watches much porn. ull last much longer that way as well
    i personally dont mind if he watches porn, it really doesnt bother me, as i said guys do. Im just saying what your gf might feel, as plently of my mates dont let there bf's watch it.
    Fair enough, you told her at first, but guys can be pretty un tactile when dealing with the whole sex issue with girls. (not you inperticular just in general) sorry about spelling im dyslexic. x
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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    If that is directed at me, how about stop being so presumptious?

    I never just randomly said it to her. She ASKS me. Whenever I take longer than usual to come during sex she will ask what i've been up to recently.

    Why on earth would i just "rub it in her face"?

    Anyway i am her first proper boyfriend, maybe this affects it? How do i convince her i am not 'lusting' after these other women and that she shouldnt feel insecure?
    just say something like you know it will never happen with the porn models nd there just there as a fantasy, at the end of the day it's her your doing it with so she shouldnt feel threatened... just explain to her.. she'll get it eventually.x
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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    My girlfriend is annoyed that i watch porn and masturbate quite alot, is she right to be annoyed? I've told her its none of her business but she says it upsets her that i'm 'lusting after other women', hm.

    Its something i've just done regularly while growing up, should i be stopping because she wants me to or is it a personal freedom she's restricting?

    Any advice appreciated
    exactly, she finds it difficult to understand how you can think about having sex with other women when it's something that should be exclusive to just the two of you. Because I imagine to her it feels like you want to have sex with these girls which is almost as bad as doing it, because of the grey area of seperating sex/love/lust etc.

    Rather than saying that it 'doesn't mean anything' and it's 'nothing' she should be remotely 'worried about' - which is true - its clearly more difficult to get her head round this approach so you need to instead tell her that it's not that you are thinking about these individual women over her, you're just turned on by watching two random people have sex. And tell her that if you're fantasising about anyone, its only ever her, you just use porn for ideas. I dunno, basically don't make her feel threatened by a hot naked woman.

    If that doesn't work then just carry on and make sure you don't get caught, you know that you don't have feelings for these pornstars, or want them over your girlfriend, its just she can't understand it doesn't mean anything.
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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    Ok, masturbating isn't THE issue. I think she'll cope with me masturbating.

    Porn is the problem. The phrases 'am i not enough' and 'lusting after other women' have come up quite often
    I'm sorry but i think thats stupid. For your gf to have a fit about you 'lusting after the girls' is ridiculous. Ask her if she really thinks its feasible for you to meet these girls you're supposedly lusting after.

    Ditch her or do it anyway. It's not up to her.
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    Well just tell her to put up with it, it sounds like her confidence/security more than anything. It's better not to 'not do it' just to please her because you'll start again anyway and there's no point in not doing it.
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    I think the porn thing, I can understand. But she has to also realise that it is fantasy, and it's not like *cheating*.. As long as she is made to feel secure and she trusts you, then I can't see why it would be a problem (unless she is insecure, in which case it might be a good thing to compromise with her). Why don't you agree to cut down?

    As for masturbating.. well, I'd say that it's none of her business......It's natural.

    How old is she?
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    If she's ok with you masturbating but doesn't like the porn, and you can't get off without the visuals, why don't you suggest videoing or taking pictures of yourselves together? That way she's happy that you're not 'lusting after other women', and you get to look at whatever it is that turns you on. That's what me and my boy do
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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    If that is directed at me, how about stop being so presumptious?

    I never just randomly said it to her. She ASKS me. Whenever I take longer than usual to come during sex she will ask what i've been up to recently.

    Why on earth would i just "rub it in her face"?

    Anyway i am her first proper boyfriend, maybe this affects it? How do i convince her i am not 'lusting' after these other women and that she shouldnt feel insecure?
    It might affect it, but pandering to it too much isn't the answer I don't think. Explain to her that it is fantasy, it is natural, and it's not about 'lusting after other girls'. Also made sure that she knows you think she is beautiful and noone can compare to her, and the fantasy of that isn't something which hinders your relationship or how you feel/think about her.
 
 
 
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