Feeling bad about a good choice
I’m turning 21 this year and have just finished my first year (i withdrew my application because of covid and reapplied for a different course) It was the right choice exept I can’t help feeling like a child as i should be going into 3rd year. It’s making me feel really insecure about my decision from a year ago. I’m unsure on what i can do to let it slide
Hi there!
I'm so sorry you're feeling this way, however, there are many ways to address this feeling, the first is to remember that you are doing the right thing for yourself. At university many people will take a year in industry/abroad or a year out of their course, causing them to already be a year behind in comparison to their peers. This is very common, the same way that a lot of people take a year out before starting uni in the first place as a Gap Year. It is very important to remember that we all go through life differently and some of us need more time than others. In some of my lectures last year we had a man in his late forties who was also completing his degree, he probably felt insecure to be surrounded by us for 19/20 years olds but he knew it was where he was supposed to be.
I would suggest joining some societies as a way to meet some more people who are your age or older for you to see that what you did is something that's very common and nothing to feel insecure about
As well as this meeting people of all ages will help you realise that just because you are turning 21 doesn't mean you have to be at a set point in your life, some people may just be starting their uni careers now, whilst others never go and may start families, it depends on what works for you
I hope this has helped!
-Bethany, UKC Rep
I'm so sorry you're feeling this way, however, there are many ways to address this feeling, the first is to remember that you are doing the right thing for yourself. At university many people will take a year in industry/abroad or a year out of their course, causing them to already be a year behind in comparison to their peers. This is very common, the same way that a lot of people take a year out before starting uni in the first place as a Gap Year. It is very important to remember that we all go through life differently and some of us need more time than others. In some of my lectures last year we had a man in his late forties who was also completing his degree, he probably felt insecure to be surrounded by us for 19/20 years olds but he knew it was where he was supposed to be.
I would suggest joining some societies as a way to meet some more people who are your age or older for you to see that what you did is something that's very common and nothing to feel insecure about
As well as this meeting people of all ages will help you realise that just because you are turning 21 doesn't mean you have to be at a set point in your life, some people may just be starting their uni careers now, whilst others never go and may start families, it depends on what works for you
I hope this has helped!
-Bethany, UKC Rep
Please don’t be ashamed of yourself. I got my 2:1 Bachelor degree when I was 28. My coursemate was even over 50. You are doing great. One day you will notice your company don’t really care about that much about it when they interview you as long as you are being honest. Just focus on graduating the course you chose and be proud of your achievement.
Hi,
Sorry you're feeling this way. You're never too old/late to study a degree. The most important thing is that you've found a course that is right for you!
I felt exactly the same as I just finished my first year just before turning 22. A lot of people on my course are 18 and it can make you feel a bit old, but there is also a plethora of people who have deferred, not passed certain years, haven't been able to join uni straight from college, or who haven't even began their higher education until quite late on. In university the age range is very varied, you just don't realise as there is so many people to keep track of lol
I think when you do make a big change it is normal to feel a bit of doubt and sometimes negative about your situation.
To reframe this and make you feel a bit more confident, would you turn round to someone else in your position and say they seem like a child for completing a whole bachelor's degree not from the age of 18? I imagine this wouldn't be the case at all, because it's not true. A degree is probably the most 'adult' thing you can do in your education, as it takes a lot of maturity to balance your time, handle your finances, and allow for study/assignment time. It's not as 'straight forward' as college and you have to be determined to get through a degree.
I hope this helps you feel better,
Lauren -Official Student Rep
Sorry you're feeling this way. You're never too old/late to study a degree. The most important thing is that you've found a course that is right for you!
I felt exactly the same as I just finished my first year just before turning 22. A lot of people on my course are 18 and it can make you feel a bit old, but there is also a plethora of people who have deferred, not passed certain years, haven't been able to join uni straight from college, or who haven't even began their higher education until quite late on. In university the age range is very varied, you just don't realise as there is so many people to keep track of lol
I think when you do make a big change it is normal to feel a bit of doubt and sometimes negative about your situation.
To reframe this and make you feel a bit more confident, would you turn round to someone else in your position and say they seem like a child for completing a whole bachelor's degree not from the age of 18? I imagine this wouldn't be the case at all, because it's not true. A degree is probably the most 'adult' thing you can do in your education, as it takes a lot of maturity to balance your time, handle your finances, and allow for study/assignment time. It's not as 'straight forward' as college and you have to be determined to get through a degree.
I hope this helps you feel better,
Lauren -Official Student Rep
(edited 1 year ago)
Original post by Efffffyyyyyyy
I’m turning 21 this year and have just finished my first year (i withdrew my application because of covid and reapplied for a different course) It was the right choice exept I can’t help feeling like a child as i should be going into 3rd year. It’s making me feel really insecure about my decision from a year ago. I’m unsure on what i can do to let it slide
Hello @Efffffyyyyyyy
Congratulations on completing your first year - that's amazing! It's wonderful that you made the right choice for yourself and ended up on a course that was right for you, at a time that was right for you. That's a really important thing. There is no one solidified path for us all to follow, I'm a mature student myself. I'm 23 and going into 2nd year in September and also know plenty of mature students! It doesn't make you like a child, or mean you're behind in any way to be where you're at now. If anything I'd say it makes you extremely insightful and mature to have made a choice that was right for you. You should be proud of yourself!
I hope your next years of study are enjoyable and you manage to move past this feeling!
All the best,
Danielle
Film and Television Studies
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