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what to say to a partner with depression watch

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    ok so my bf comes on here a lot so i want to post anonymous first of all.


    i'd really appreciate some help here fellow SRers. my bf has recently been suffering from stress which has come from a condition he has. the doctor doesn't quite know whats up with him but he saw him 4 months ago and his state has got worse since. he is seeing him next week but he's really ancious(sp?) about the appointment. he gets pains in his joints and is really tired all the time though he doesn't like to admit it. now he's worried that he won't be able to look after me or himself and says he's useless, doesn't want me to leave him etc. he sometimes struggles to get out of bed and it really gets him down but i don't know what to say to him. he gets really upset over im and i don't know what to say to him. its started to get me down now as well but i can't leave him as i love him and it will only make him a lot worse.
    what can i say to him?

    thank you
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    I don't know, but I'd love to! It hurts so much to see someone you care about go through this, indeed, often so much that I start crying too. As of yet, the only thing I think I can actually do is be there for him, just to hold, and listen if he needs it. It seems impossibe to 'cajole' someone out of it.
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    Tell him you love him and you will be there for him no matter what. Listen to him, reasure him you are going nowhere and ask him how you can help him. Don't push him and try not to become frustrated with the situation because he probably feels pretty helpless at the moment.

    Perhaps suggest he sees a councillor too? You can get a referral through a GP. This might be too big a problem for you to deal with on your own, you mustn't forget your own well-being too, and if it does become too hard you might need to step back a bit...just be honest with him about that.

    You sound like you are a good girlfriend though, asking for advice and such, i wish you and him the best of luck and hope he gets better. It will take time but it is possible.
 
 
 
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