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I feel like I can't feel attachment for people (but not like a serial killer!) watch

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    I love my mum, and I have a couple of friends, one of whom I'd tell a lot of things (but she doesn't live here) and another some things (but she's in uni at the moment so I only see her in the holidays). I've never felt like I can tell the latter if I like a guy or anything. I can't share my feelings with them, or trust them, or anything like that. There are some guys that I go down the pub, or bowling, or cinema with, but I don't class them as friends because I wouldn't tell them things that are personal to me. Some of the guys at work tell me they love me (jokingly obvs) and give me nicknames, but although I like talking to them I can't trust them. And I'm fed up of not really fancying/feeling in love with a bloke.

    Every so often someone will come along and I'll develop strong feelings for, either a friend or a guy or whoever, but most of the time I just seem to exist among people. And it's not because I don't meet the people to grow attached to; I do go out and - when everyone from uni comes back - to parties, and I go out down the pub normally at least once a week, and so on..

    I just seem very cold and closed off, so that even when people care about me I don't feel like I care about them. I'm not sure this thread is going to help, but any suggestions?
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    I think you can only know whether to trust people if you take a chance. Try confiding in your second friend, over something small like the guy you're eyeing at the mo. She could be useful. She could confirm your doubts. You'd lose nothing either way.
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    (Original post by Juwel)
    I think you can only know whether to trust people if you take a chance. Try confiding in your second friend, over something small like the guy you're eyeing at the mo. She could be useful. She could confirm your doubts. You'd lose nothing either way.
    OMG! I was just wondering what your signature meant by "teleporting ninja" and it made me jump when it appeared! I would rep you but I got negged the other day on the thread about the 13 year old girl refusing a heart transplant.
    Thank you for the jollies!
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    (Original post by Juwel)
    I think you can only know whether to trust people if you take a chance. Try confiding in your second friend, over something small like the guy you're eyeing at the mo. She could be useful. She could confirm your doubts. You'd lose nothing either way.
    I know she would. She's almost completely trustworthy; I just don't want to tell her about the way I feel and so on. Besides, there aren't any guys I'm eyeing up at the moment. The 'trust' bit was more the minor issue. The rest of it is the way I don't want to confide in people, and the way that a lot of the people I talk to regularly/go out with seem to be more attached to me than I am to them.
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    I feel the same way most of the time, and for a long period before this year, Í was actually really worried if I could ever allow myself to fall in love. It felt like there was some sort of self-defence system that just started rejecting/stopping people as soon as they reached a certain point... It is frightening... Although most people can't seem to understand it.

    Don't worry though, OP. I've now met someone really amazing, and despite only knowing him for a few weeks, find myself really really caring for him So much so that it alarmed me at first. Sometimes it just requires time and the right person... and everything just falls into place

    But right now, do try confiding in your friend. I know it could be difficult and awkward at first but once you let it out, you'd feel so much better and your friendship would grow stronger too!
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    (Original post by falls_whisper)
    I feel the same way most of the time, and for a long period before this year, Í was actually really worried if I could ever allow myself to fall in love. It felt like there was some sort of self-defence system that just started rejecting/stopping people as soon as they reached a certain point... It is frightening... Although most people can't seem to understand it.

    Don't worry though, OP. I've now met someone really amazing, and despite only knowing him for a few weeks, find myself really really caring for him So much so that it alarmed me at first. Sometimes it just requires time and the right person... and everything just falls into place

    But right now, do try confiding in your friend. I know it could be difficult and awkward at first but once you let it out, you'd feel so much better and your friendship would grow stronger too!
    Ok, thank you. That's reassuring!
 
 
 
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