Hey there! Sign in to join this conversationNew here? Join for free

My boyfriend feels like my Dad Watch

    Offline

    15
    ReputationRep:
    (Original post by EskimoJo)
    The Electra complex. :yep:
    I shall remember that, thankyou. :top2:
    Offline

    15
    ReputationRep:
    Hmm if he thinks you're not mature enough then maybe you don't see it but you're really not?
    I'm 19 and my boyfriend is 27 but there's no problems like them between us.
    Offline

    0
    ReputationRep:
    "Oh daddy, I've been a very naughty girl..."

    You need to be spanked for not appreciating a good thing. :p:
    Offline

    2
    ReputationRep:
    Point. Ask him why he's attracted to a girl who he thinks is too young to look after herself...
    Offline

    0
    ReputationRep:
    (Original post by Anonymous)
    He fusses and worries about me all the time.....
    It'll be: "Are you warm enough?" or " You didn't eat before you came out, you need to eat something hot." "Remember to wear your woolen coat."
    Bless. :p:
    Offline

    15
    ReputationRep:
    Well I don't know... the age gap isn't a problem but the way he treats her is surely a point. Weird guy!
    Offline

    17
    ReputationRep:
    sorry, do 18 year olds automatically act differently from other adults?

    DR:"so you have basically a bad liver, do you drink"
    patient:"yeah, it's called being 18 GAWD!"
    DR:"so? what's so special about being 18?"

    is getting pissed a big thing for you?
    Offline

    11
    ReputationRep:
    Get out while you can, before he suffocates you with his 'kindness'. I think people are confusing caring with controlling.
    Offline

    1
    Well it could be worse; he could have raped you.
    Offline

    17
    ReputationRep:
    (Original post by Rei)
    Well it could be worse; he could have raped you.
    is it about it being worse though? or is it about how bad or not bad it is. I think that something needs to be changed in the relationship, but that has nothing to do with her being 18.

    If you're being smothered, firstly tell him, secondly get some hobbies not involving him so that you get some of your personal space.
    Offline

    2
    ReputationRep:
    we are only getting one side of story remember.
    it just sounds like he care's to me. show him you can look after yourself and conduct yourself in a manner that he won't feel the need to fuss.
    • #1
    • Thread Starter
    #1

    (Original post by LH123)
    You obviously have the female version of the Oedipus complex.

    Unlucky.

    Urm, no- it seems like you've misunderstood. Because I'm not enjoying it. Surely people who want to **** someone who is similar to their own father would actively seek it out?
    I actually find it a turn off to the detriment of our relationship.
    • #1
    • Thread Starter
    #1

    (Original post by Rutter knows best!)
    we are only getting one side of story remember.
    it just sounds like he care's to me. show him you can look after yourself and conduct yourself in a manner that he won't feel the need to fuss.

    There's caring, and there's suffocating. I find this too much. Even my parents agree , and when they're around ours they tells him to 'lay off a bit'.

    I kind of know why he is like he is though. His Dad was a really bad parent- and it was left to my boyfriend to look after his younger siblings a lot of the time. I think the age gap brings out a lot of that paternal side.
    I have told him I understand this. He does get better sometimes, but then it worsens again, and he gets overbearing again.
    Offline

    15
    ReputationRep:
    (Original post by Anonymous)
    Urm, no- it seems like you've misunderstood. Because I'm not enjoying it. Surely people who want to **** someone who is similar to their own father would actively seek it out?
    I actually find it a turn off to the detriment of our relationship.
    But something must have attracted you to him in the first place. :zomg:
    Offline

    17
    ReputationRep:
    I would just tell him, honesty gets you far...
    • #1
    • Thread Starter
    #1

    (Original post by LH123)
    But something must have attracted you to him in the first place. :zomg:

    He wasn't like that initially. We met nearly 7 months ago on a night out and we hit it off immediately, I fancied him a lot. However since I moved in with him 2 months ago it's just gone a bit crap really.
    • #1
    • Thread Starter
    #1

    (Original post by Rei)
    Well it could be worse; he could have raped you.

    Yes, or he could have put arsenic in my breakfast cereal, or burned my parents' home down. I guess I should be grateful for that.
    Offline

    2
    (Original post by LH123)
    You obviously have the female version of the Oedipus complex.

    Unlucky.
    The female version of the Oedipus complex is the Elecktra complex and is also known as penis envy because girls blame their mums as being the reason they don't have a penis. The girl becomes attracted to the father and wants to be pregnant by the father while becoming more hostile to the mother and this occurs in the phallic stage of psychosexual student.

    Sorry for hijacking the thread and sounding like a know-it-all but as a psychology student I couldn't let that by.

    The OPs situation is nothing like the female version of the Oedipus complex
    Offline

    15
    ReputationRep:
    (Original post by sleekchic)
    The female version of the Oedipus complex is the Elecktra complex and is also known as penis envy because girls blame their mums as being the reason they don't have a penis. The girl becomes attracted to the father and wants to be pregnant by the father while becoming more hostile to the mother and this occurs in the phallic stage of psychosexual student.

    Sorry for hijacking the thread and sounding like a know-it-all but as a psychology student I couldn't let that by.

    The OPs situation is nothing like the female version of the Oedipus complex
    Someone already told me that, so you are too late - sorry.

    And calm down, it wasn't even a serious comment.
    Offline

    0
    ReputationRep:
    (Original post by No Future)
    Better than having a bf like a child with no clue who can't do anything himself...

    that is so true, if u mature then u ll be able to talk about it and put ur point across which im sure u are:yep:
 
 
 
Reply
Submit reply
TSR Support Team

We have a brilliant team of more than 60 Support Team members looking after discussions on The Student Room, helping to make it a fun, safe and useful place to hang out.

Updated: November 13, 2008
  • See more of what you like on The Student Room

    You can personalise what you see on TSR. Tell us a little about yourself to get started.

  • Poll
    Would you like to hibernate through the winter months?
  • See more of what you like on The Student Room

    You can personalise what you see on TSR. Tell us a little about yourself to get started.

  • The Student Room, Get Revising and Marked by Teachers are trading names of The Student Room Group Ltd.

    Register Number: 04666380 (England and Wales), VAT No. 806 8067 22 Registered Office: International House, Queens Road, Brighton, BN1 3XE

    Quick reply
    Reputation gems: You get these gems as you gain rep from other members for making good contributions and giving helpful advice.