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    Anon because if she/any of her mates read it they'll know its me.

    Anyway, I'm in my first (and hopefully only) relationship, but my gf is acting weirder than ever before. She keeps getting strange mood swings and I dunno if she's just acting that way or maybe it's the time of month? Eg..

    I'm going abroad for 3 days soon from uni. I told her we won't be able to text or phone each other as much as we usually do, and she's just like "ok then, have fun with your mates. Maybe we need time apart, we're too attached" Yet when I dont text her for over an hour, she misses me like mad. What's she trying to say? I'm thinking of not going, just because I'm going to miss her too much.

    Another example. She keeps saying things like "you're not special anymore" and "yeah this isnt working out." But when I ask her why, she's like "oh noooo, Im just messing I dont really mean it hehe. Obviously I love u"

    And whenever she asks me waht Im doing, I say something like "Just at uni with a weird girl next to me" She'll say something like "ooh maybe she likes you"

    :confused: :confused:

    She's playing with me she really is, but I dunno what's going through her mind. Anyone?
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    Kinda sounds like she's scared of losing you, so is using sarcasm and cruel statements that she can quickly retract to 'protect' herself.
    Is there anything you can do to prove that she's the only one for you. The fact that you said that this will hopefully be your only ever relationship sounds like you're taking it very seriously, but maybe that's not coming across to her?

    Actually, heck. Maybe it's the complete opposite and she's not ready for a serious relationship and/or wants to leave this one for some reason, but doesn't want to be the one to break up so she's putting ideas into your head 'maybe she likes you?', encouraging you to 'have fun with your mates' and basically trying to push you into doing the breaking up.

    I dunno. It could be one of the two, imo and since they are vastly different situations with such different solutions, I think the only real thing I can advise you to do is talk to her, ask her what's wrong and tell her how confused her actions/words are making you feel.

    Good luck mate.
    • #2
    #2

    i can be exactly the same with my boyfriend (yes i know its bad *ashamed*) and mostly i think it shows being a bit insecure. shes probably saying the stuff about other girls because she wants reassurance about you only wanting her, and not being interested in other girls. This is especially true if shes not at uni too. youre surrounded by all those girls and she might be feeling worried.
    the stuff about it not working out is also probably for reassurance, she wants you to tell her how much you value it all. tell her you only want her, and she needs to trust that you're committed to the relationship. talk to her and ask her what she really wants, communication is the key point.

    us women need to get over ourselves lol.
    • #3
    #3

    A very smart woman once told me the key to any relationship is reassurance.

    Wonder why a girl is freaking out on you or is suddenly suspicious/emotional/confusing? Usually it means she needs reassurance. To avoid any future problems, just reassure them every once in while (though don't be clingy of course, and not often enough to creep them out stalker-style.)

    P.S. The advice above only pretains to those who have at least semi-sane girlfriends, who haven't messed up their relationship in fundemental ways, or who are serious about their girlfriend. If she does want to break up with you, that's something else.
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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    i think it shows being a bit insecure. shes probably saying the stuff about other girls because she wants reassurance about you only wanting her, and not being interested in other girls. This is especially true if shes not at uni too. youre surrounded by all those girls and she might be feeling worried.
    As the previous girl just mentioned, she is being insecure in the sense of not knowing perhaps, where you are and what you want.
    It's all a matter of feeling important, that you want her and no one else. No one wants to feel worried that their boyfriend might be talking, flirting, (I’m not saying, you’re doing it..) to other girls. Your girlfriend, as you have explained to us, wants to feel that she’s in the center; she’s all yours and you’re hers.
    I think the most important thing is that you talk to her, ask her what you have just asked us, if not, it might just get worse. I also don’t think that you should miss out and not go to uni for her, even though you’ll miss her. If she loves you, she will be there, just explain to her how much you love her, so she knows, and will not feel insecure.

    It’s important, I know from what my friends have told me, I cannot say anything from my personal experiences, since I never really had a person that I could trust.
    Good luck!
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    (Original post by Anonymous)

    us women need to get over ourselves lol.
    Agreed lol.

    I can sometimes act wierd with my bf. I feel really bad about it.
    But thats mostly because there's something on my mind that I wanna talk but I can't.
    Mainly because nothing happens, so I keep it to myself, then he gets annoyed that I don't say whats wrong.

    Maybe subtly ask if there is anything wrong and if there is anything on her mind.
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    She's scared of you going away so she's trying to pretend like it doesn't bother her by being hurtful. She needs reassurance or to talk about something. I can be really awkward with my boyfriend when i'm worried about something.

    You need to make it clear to her that she's the only one you want and that won't change.
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    Trying to understand the workings of the female mind is near impossible.
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    She sounds extremely insecure about losing you! I think making sure she knows she's you're one and only is a good idea, but I have to agree girls are crazy! I speak for my species!
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    Girls are confusing creatures

    Anyways, I agree with everyone that said it sounds like she wants reassurance. With regards to the "we're probably too attached, blabla" when she knows you're not going to speak for a few days, and yet still missing you when you're gone, is something I've totally done myself. She probably really does miss you, but doesn't want to make it obvious all the time because she doesn't want to seem clingy/doesn't think you miss her as much/is a tiny bit annoyed at you for "abandoning" her.

    The rest of it though, sounds like something you need to talk her about, though. Reassure her that you love her, she means everything to you, etc.
    Hope it all works out
 
 
 
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