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    Posting as anon. for various reasons

    I was just wondering what advice people could give. I feel absolutely pathetic. Its been a few months since my girlfriend broke up with me but I still find myself totally hung up on her.
    We were going out for around about a year when, one day at school things just felt 'odd' and she seemed a bit uninterested. She had been a bit like this once before (when it turned out she was just a bit down) so I pulled her on this and she just said things were fine and continued with the whole 'I love you' kissing n hugging. All the same I felt a bit 'WTF' and spent ages chatting with one of my best mates bout it. However once the weekend had passed I just got the dreaded text (yes text, I hate that ) that she'd dumped me. About five days later (after boasting to all her mates n wanting to tell me first) she sent me another text saying she was in a "new relationship" which i managed to drag out of her to come to mean she was with my best mate and had been since "Wednesday", she having sent the text dumping me at 2330 on Wednesday.
    Needless to say I felt rubbish and rather humiliated. I'd love nothing more but to completely forget her, but I can't. I see her EVERYWHERE (us still going to the same school), and tbh she's rather hot. But its not just a physical attraction, I still find myself yearning to be with her and torturing myself with memories of the 'good old days' when i was with her. What doesnt help is the thoughts "what if I'd fought for her?", "what if I hadnt just rolled over n let her go?". Something at the back of my mind just keeps urging me to go for it, put myself on the line and have another go, but i know thats not the best thing for me. But she was just 'the one' - ive had a few opportunities with some absolutely amazing girls, but i dont want them, "they're not her"

    I've not a clue what to do tbh and what I'm like just smacks of Patheticism...

    Sorry for the rambling, but its a somethin to read! Any advice at all?
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    Eh, I don't know what 'hotheaded mentalist's problem is. No need for the bull he just sprouted.

    To be honest, if after a long and loving relationship she was willing to do that, it's prob not worth it. And if you had fought for her, she might have stayed, but ended cheating on you?

    Who knows. It'll take time, and yes it will hurt, but, c'est la vie.

    Good luck.
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    You need to get a grip.
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    She dumped you for your best mate? That's harsh. Can I ask how old you are?

    The only solution is time. It's hard to let go off someone esp with the 'what if' thoughts but you just have to keep your mind off it, stay busy and move on. Easier said than done though. And your 'mate', kick the crap.....
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    2nd poster is a wan....er, so don't listen to him, he'll be banned before long.

    It's not pathetic OP, I'm sure you're not the first ever person in the history of the world to be in this scenario. I'm sure it'll work out for you, I don't have much advice, but I will suggest is if there's anyone else out there who takes your fancy? That'll probably help, take your mind off this previous relationship.
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    (Original post by flown_muse)
    Eh, I don't know what 'hotheaded mentalist's problem is. No need for the bull he just sprouted.
    This.
    OP: I know it sounds obvious but I think you should just try to forget about her, she obviously isn't worth it if you where together a year and she broke up with you by text, and then went off with your best friend. You'll find someone soon, don't worry
    Good luck!
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    I think everyone's being harsh on the OP. Surely, you would feel miserable if a girl you really like unceremoniously dumped you by text message, and turned out to prefer your best friend.
    In my opinion, it's understandable that you feel depressed about it all.
    The only thing you can do- tough as it may sound- is move on from these people. Your best friend did an unforgivable thing in my book, and I wouldn't really want to associate with them after that. The girl obviously isn't a very good person either. Perhaps you should spend time with different people away from that circle of friends, or concentrate on things/hobbies you like doing to try take your mind off it for a while. But you will move on- and it's understandable that it may take a bit of time. And please OP, don't let that episode tarnish your image of girls, we're not all like that, I assure you.
    • #2
    #2

    The best part about hitting rock bottom is that the healing process is ready to begin.
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    Man, I wonder about the ability of some of these people to criticise you, OP. In the same situation they'd feel MUCH worse.

    Hold on in there, I know how it is, I know how it feels getting dumped for somebody else after so long and having it end so so quickly. Thankfully my ex's ex/new bf lives in scotland so its okay for me to cope with. I can't imagine how painful it is, and I know its hard, but just stay in there, okay? Do whatever it takes to cope, make yourself as happy as you can, but dont let yourself be weak to her. Love is our biggest weakness as well as our biggest strength... she isn't worth it, mate. Make yourself happy because you don't need her, and it will be VERY hard, but it is possible... just route out the crud from your life and stay strong, and dont let the cow win in breaking you.
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    OP, you aren't pathetic, and I sympathise with you and the situation you're in - it must be horrible for you. I've never been in an equivilent situation myself but it's perfectly natural to be upset when the girl you love has cheated on you, and with your best mate too.

    Hang on in there and do your best to forget about her - you'll meet someone else who you deserve and who deserves you.
    • #1
    • Thread Starter
    #1

    Thanks to those who have replied 'properly'
    And yes, I did mean 'what the fudge'! lol
    I get what you're all saying, and I very much believe that she is far from worth it; it's just very hard accepting that the person you loved essentially doesn't exist anymore; she vanished and I can't help but wish that the right person would hurry up!
    For the person who asked, i'm in the upper sixth
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    Thats harsh man. Have sex with 10 other girls and she won't feel so special anymore.

    On a serious note, don't try and get back with her, it is VERY unlikely to suceed ad will jsut stir up bad emotions. The reason she broke up with you is almost certainly not your fault and is just the way the relationship panned out. After all for every beginning there must be an end... I say stop torturing yourself about it and move forward to enjoy your "amazing girls" ;-)

    Good luck man
    badboy6969
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    you ask if your pathetic yet you say so yourself 'i feel absolutely pathetic'

    stop being a self depricating attetion whore

    and yes, yes you are pathetic, for making this thread and for God only knows for many other reasons


    please makesure you sign your neg reps please, it just makes it that bit more special :awesome:
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    :hugs:
    No. But you gotta move on, hard as it is.
 
 
 
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