The Student Room Group

1 year of Uni rugby, and I have had enough!

Hey Everyone!

Just wanted to share with you a little about my experience (last academic year) playing rugby for my then (I transferred) Uni and how it put me off rugby forever.

So, to give you a brief bit of background, I did not start Uni with the intention of playing rugby at all. My sporting background is in wrestling. But whilst walking around the uni sports freshers event, I was approached by the president of the uni rugby team. He was clearly taken by my size (6'3 250lbs) and asked me if I wanted to play rugby. As someone who is often shy and struggles to make friends, I agreed to give it a go. After all, everyone seemed friendly enough and really keen for me to get involved. I walked away feeling really excited, thinking this would be a great way for me to make some serious friendships (something I'd been worried about when starting uni).

I won't bore you with the build up, but long and short of it, majority of the team turned out to be absolute w*nkers. Extremely narcissistic, cocky and vulgar individuals:

-Didn't care that I'd never played rugby before and constantly made me feel bad for fumbling the ball or being on the wrong side during rucks etc (no one bothered to actually help me get better, or explain the rules to me, even the coach lol).

-Before/during matches the senior players would often tell me to try and injury members of the other team. Ie: try and pop someone's knee, stamp on them, crocodile roll them etc. I never did obviously. But so much for "rugby values," coz I never saw them.

-Was socially ostracised because I preferred going home to rest after training/matches rather than going out on the ****. Certain individuals became cold around me, and started to berate me during training.

-First and last time I went out with them, they tried to get me to do some extremely vulgar and frankly illegal initiation challenges. I flatly refused, and was shocked that these individuals would find something so vile and inhumane to be worthy of humour. (I'd rather not go into details tbh)

-The committee was made up of extremely entitled and 'well connected' lads, who were only doing it for their CVs, and didn't give less of a **** about being 'community minded' and 'open to all.'

-Could write a bloody thesis on why their attitudes towards women were utterly reprehensible and still makes me feel sick to think about it.

All in all, I stuck it out for the entire year. Mainly, because there was always a small part of me that believed things would improve and that they would grow to accept me. They didn't, and I kick myself for not quitting early on.

Now at my new university, I am doing Brazilian Jiu Jitsu, which is turning out to be absolutely amazing. So many beautiful, kind and passionate people all trying to get better at a very difficult discipline. Im so glad I found BJJ and the people involved in it.

If you're thinking about playing Uni rugby, I strongly suggest you give it a go and see how it goes. But if you ever feel uncomfortable or unwelcome, LEAVE! AND DON'T LOOK BACK!!!
Original post by Socialintrovert2
Hey Everyone!

Just wanted to share with you a little about my experience (last academic year) playing rugby for my then (I transferred) Uni and how it put me off rugby forever.

So, to give you a brief bit of background, I did not start Uni with the intention of playing rugby at all. My sporting background is in wrestling. But whilst walking around the uni sports freshers event, I was approached by the president of the uni rugby team. He was clearly taken by my size (6'3 250lbs) and asked me if I wanted to play rugby. As someone who is often shy and struggles to make friends, I agreed to give it a go. After all, everyone seemed friendly enough and really keen for me to get involved. I walked away feeling really excited, thinking this would be a great way for me to make some serious friendships (something I'd been worried about when starting uni).

I won't bore you with the build up, but long and short of it, majority of the team turned out to be absolute w*nkers. Extremely narcissistic, cocky and vulgar individuals:

-Didn't care that I'd never played rugby before and constantly made me feel bad for fumbling the ball or being on the wrong side during rucks etc (no one bothered to actually help me get better, or explain the rules to me, even the coach lol).

-Before/during matches the senior players would often tell me to try and injury members of the other team. Ie: try and pop someone's knee, stamp on them, crocodile roll them etc. I never did obviously. But so much for "rugby values," coz I never saw them.

-Was socially ostracised because I preferred going home to rest after training/matches rather than going out on the ****. Certain individuals became cold around me, and started to berate me during training.

-First and last time I went out with them, they tried to get me to do some extremely vulgar and frankly illegal initiation challenges. I flatly refused, and was shocked that these individuals would find something so vile and inhumane to be worthy of humour. (I'd rather not go into details tbh)

-The committee was made up of extremely entitled and 'well connected' lads, who were only doing it for their CVs, and didn't give less of a **** about being 'community minded' and 'open to all.'

-Could write a bloody thesis on why their attitudes towards women were utterly reprehensible and still makes me feel sick to think about it.

All in all, I stuck it out for the entire year. Mainly, because there was always a small part of me that believed things would improve and that they would grow to accept me. They didn't, and I kick myself for not quitting early on.

Now at my new university, I am doing Brazilian Jiu Jitsu, which is turning out to be absolutely amazing. So many beautiful, kind and passionate people all trying to get better at a very difficult discipline. Im so glad I found BJJ and the people involved in it.

If you're thinking about playing Uni rugby, I strongly suggest you give it a go and see how it goes. But if you ever feel uncomfortable or unwelcome, LEAVE! AND DON'T LOOK BACK!!!


It's surprising to see someone who was never forced to do rugby in school. I have never considered doing rugby at uni as I absolutely loathed and dreaded rugby in school because I was shorter and skinnier than everyone else in my year. Dispite not doing rugby at uni, your experience with rugby sounds very similar to mine except for the social part. Anecdotally, a lot of people who like rugby lack empathy when it comes to preventing injuries and helping teammates.
Original post by hungrysalamander
It's surprising to see someone who was never forced to do rugby in school. I have never considered doing rugby at uni as I absolutely loathed and dreaded rugby in school because I was shorter and skinnier than everyone else in my year. Dispite not doing rugby at uni, your experience with rugby sounds very similar to mine except for the social part. Anecdotally, a lot of people who like rugby lack empathy when it comes to preventing injuries and helping teammates.

I attended an international school, at which the main sports for boys were football (soccer) and wrestling. It was not a conventional British school education.
Original post by Socialintrovert2
I attended an international school, at which the main sports for boys were football (soccer) and wrestling. It was not a conventional British school education.


Fair enough. At least you tried something new even if you didn't end up liking it.
I mean TBF I don't like rugby full stop so yeah
Original post by hungrysalamander
Fair enough. At least you tried something new even if you didn't end up liking it.

See, I didn't mind the actual rugby part. In fact, I got to a reasonable standard by the new year. Mainly from just watching a lot of yt vids and practising alone. But I feel that this kind of culture is far too ingrained in rugby and you will always find it in some form. This is what puts me off. I grew to genuinely like the sport itself.
Why am I not surprised. Especially about the committee stuff. Students only do it for their CVs and are so lazy when it comes to doing actual work.
Also, I am sorry you had to go through that. Glad you found a better environment for yourself.
Original post by Serene Dreams
Also, I am sorry you had to go through that. Glad you found a better environment for yourself.

Hey, thank you! I think weirdly, I couldn't comprehend how bad it was until I stepped away from it. At the time, I was way too caught up in tying to make friends, navigate being at uni etc...
Original post by Socialintrovert2
Hey, thank you! I think weirdly, I couldn't comprehend how bad it was until I stepped away from it. At the time, I was way too caught up in tying to make friends, navigate being at uni etc...


To be fair, this is really common. Everyone wants to fit in and the desire for social acceptance can at times make our judgement a little...skewed? What matters is that you have learnt from this experience what to look out for when you meet new people and your own values/boundaries are a little firmer

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