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    Hey, I would like this to be anonymus since it's a private matter and I don't want people I know to see it.
    So last night I was really drunk and kissed this guy. He was not a stranger but a friend of a friend whom I had seen several times before. I ended up going home with him, no sex but we slept in the same bed and made out quite a lot. This morning, he was holding my hand a little more and so on and all in all seemed to be pretty attached, told me he likes and fancies me... I don't know what to do. I mean he is a very nice guy I guess, but I don't really know him very well. And him being so attached scares me a little bit. I don't want to hurt him but I am not sure I like him that way. And I don't know if I want a relationship right now. An other problem is the age difference, I am quite a bit older than he is (though both first years') and that is holding me back.
    I honestly don't really know what I want from you guys, the whole situation is just really messed up in my opinion, I am usually not the girl who goes home with someone and thinks about the consequences afterwards, but I think about my actions beforehand. So what do you think should I do? How should I behave around him? Was it a huge mistake to go home with him in the first place?
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    I think you should give him a chance - is he a nice guy?

    But slowly move away if you're really not interested. I don't think the age here is the problem... if he comes on a bit strong, I guess that can be annoying, but it might be nice to be with a guy who really likes you.

    Give it some more time.
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    Can I ask how big the age difference is?

    Also why do you see it as a problem, surely age doesnt matter if you've got good chemistry?
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    It is more than two years. I don't really know why I see it as a problem, I am probably just not used to the idea. Sounds very shallow, I know.
    I don't think he is coming on way too strong, he seems shy. Therefore I worry even more about hurting him and doing the wrong thing.
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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    It is more than two years. I don't really know why I see it as a problem, I am probably just not used to the idea. Sounds very shallow, I know.
    I don't think he is coming on way too strong, he seems shy. Therefore I worry even more about hurting him and doing the wrong thing.
    If you like him then why not just go with it...see where it leads?
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    You sound a lot like me. There was this customer at my work who I fancied, we chatted for a month before he asked me out. He's sweet, and lovely, and sounds quite like the guy you describe. Now, six months later we are still together and he was my first, and I feel that we'll be together for a good while yet. He's 4 and a half years older than me.

    I think you should go for it. You say that you're sensible, let go for once, I think it'll be worth it
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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    You sound a lot like me. There was this customer at my work who I fancied, we chatted for a month before he asked me out. He's sweet, and lovely, and sounds quite like the guy you describe. Now, six months later we are still together and he was my first, and I feel that we'll be together for a good while yet. He's 4 and a half years older than me.

    I think you should go for it. You say that you're sensible, let go for once, I think it'll be worth it
    It feels so hard to let go somehow. I don't know. I am always overthinking these things. But it is really nice to hear that it worked out for you Does the age difference bother you somehow?

    Thanks to everyone!! I maybe just needed to hear that I am not competely crazy for having all these mixed feelings and that the age difference isn't seen as such big deal. I am feeling way better now about last night
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    i think you might regret it if you just ignore it, its refreshing to hear he didnt try and come on to you, when he got u alone..he seems like a nice guy maybe you should give him a chance? and the age gap i wouldnt really see it as a big issue
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    Hes a nice guy. Give him a chance. And the age thing. Anything below 5 years is usually non existant. Because you dont notice that much difference. Also.. if your really not into him...then break it to him easily. But yeah..what ever you decide...hes a nice guy, treat him nice.
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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    Hey, I would like this to be anonymus since it's a private matter and I don't want people I know to see it.
    So last night I was really drunk and kissed this guy. He was not a stranger but a friend of a friend whom I had seen several times before. I ended up going home with him, no sex but we slept in the same bed and made out quite a lot. This morning, he was holding my hand a little more and so on and all in all seemed to be pretty attached, told me he likes and fancies me... I don't know what to do. I mean he is a very nice guy I guess, but I don't really know him very well. And him being so attached scares me a little bit. I don't want to hurt him but I am not sure I like him that way. And I don't know if I want a relationship right now. An other problem is the age difference, I am quite a bit older than he is (though both first years') and that is holding me back.
    I honestly don't really know what I want from you guys, the whole situation is just really messed up in my opinion, I am usually not the girl who goes home with someone and thinks about the consequences afterwards, but I think about my actions beforehand. So what do you think should I do? How should I behave around him? Was it a huge mistake to go home with him in the first place?
    There's always the chance he's not really that attached and he was just angling for sex. Not sure if that would be good or not from your point of view
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    I dont think he just wanted sex. He didn't make a move into that direction at all. We were on his bed and were fooling around quite a lot, so it would have been easy for him to go there. Not that I would have done it, but you know, he could have tried...
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    (Original post by Zamolxes)
    Hes a nice guy. Give him a chance. And the age thing. Anything below 5 years is usually non existant. Because you dont notice that much difference. Also.. if your really not into him...then break it to him easily. But yeah..what ever you decide...hes a nice guy, treat him nice.
    And yes, I am trying to be as nice as possible. I talked to him today for a while and told him that I think we moved things too far too quickly last night, and that I am not sure about my feelings but that I guess we should get to know each other a little better. I hope that was nice enough, but he seemed ok with it and told me to take my time. Which I am not used to from guys at all
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    And some girls wonder why guys think they give out mixed signals...
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    I know I am giving out mixed signals right now. That's the problem. I don't really know what I want. But I told him so I hope he will be ok with that
 
 
 
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