Failed a levels and and now I feel like my whole life is over - M3dicine offer

I got my results in August and my whole world came crashing down. I got CDD, needed BBC for gateway medicine, had my offer for leeds. Leeds was my dream university. I thought I could get the grades. I really did. Now everyone I know is in university having fun and I'm here. I didn't revise a lot because I was battling depression and other stuff, I could barely get out of bed, talk to anyone in the weeks before exams. The exam pressure made it worse but I still tried my best and it didn't work out.

I then applied to uni of sofia and did the exam on saturday, I thought it went great and I did well. Turns out it wasn't good enough. But all I want to do is medicine. I dont know what to do. I think it's too late to retake the year because I'm applying so late. I also missed the UCAT exam so what do I do?

I'm so lost, I could do pharmacy with a foundation year but I'm just not interested in it at all. Should I retake and reapply - I'd get into uni at around 20/21? I'm scared I don't have it in me to retake and get a good score? What if I go through an episode again and fail?

I feel so lost right now. I don't know what to do. My mental health is going to suffer. I can't stop thinking about turning back time and revising more but I know I did all I could.

Ive never hated myself so much. Why can't I just be normal. Why could I not just have studied harder?? I wish depression didn't exist.

I know it's easier said than done but please try not to blame or hate yourself for everything, especially the depression. You are not to blame and you did everything you could and anyone reasonable will understand that. You can still study medicine, it might just take you a bit longer, and that's ok. We all go through life at our own pace. Do what's best for you, not what society expects of you. You are good enough for medicine. So many good and great applicants get turned down or don't get in every year and that's fine. It's how you come back from that.

Is there any way you could speak to Leeds about what happened and see what they advise? If your depression was recorded by your doctor, you may be eligible for extenuating circumstances, which would help you with any future medical applications and help explain to Leeds why you didn't get the grades you needed. Maybe the university could work something out with you or let you reapply with next year's (2024) cohort of students. For your depression, please speak to a professional. They could really help you especially if you decide to resit.

If medicine is really what you want to do, resit and reapply. A lot of people will do this for medicine as well as taking gap years. 20/21 is not old at all and I can tell you now, there will absolutely be people on the course that will be older than you. It will be a bit harder as some medical schools won't accept resits (unless you have extenuating circumstances) but it is doable and worth it if it really is what you want to do. I wouldn't do the pharmacy if I were you. Doing a course which you have absolutely no interest in will not help your mental health at all. Use the year to improve your application (Get more work experience - Online if in-person is too much for you right now as you can go at your own pace) and resit.

Alternatively, you could look into other career paths that are linked to medicine that aren't as well known if you decide it is not for you. Maybe a Physician Associate degree after a different healthcare degree. Even though it's not ideal, you could also look into Graduate Entry Medicine (GEM), even though it's more competitive and you shouldn't really go into a degree with GEM in mind.

Please don't give up. You will beat the depression and if you really want it, you will get into medical school at some point. Best of luck with whatever you decide to do and feel free to message me at any time

Thank you so much 😭😭😭 I’ve been calling colleges and sixth forms but they’re not replying, one said they’ve stopped taking people in for this year :/. I could go back to my old sixth form but it’s going to be with all the people in the year below and I didn’t like anyone in that year, I really don’t want to go back because it will be so embarrassing when they see me 😭. I want to go to a completely different place. If nobody takes me in I’ll have to self study which I don’t fancy doing 😭. Ugh I wish I didn’t do the Sofia exam because then I would’ve been able to enroll for this year and do UCAT but I really thought I’d get in.

Thank you for being so supportive and understanding 😭 I really appreciate it so much. I think somehow I’ll have to find a way to retake this year and then take the UCAT for the following year, hopefully while keeping a job for a few days on the side and going to the gym.

I go to church and everyone there always was asking me when I’m going to uni and I told them bc I thought I’d go and now they’re all like oh why aren’t you at uni yet - they’re all like Middle Aged and old. And I say I’m on a gap year but I’m embarrassed to say I’m retaking now and their looks are so condescending.


I just wish I had like one other person I knew who was retaking

I got my results in August and my whole world came crashing down. I got CDD, needed BBC for gateway medicine, had my offer for leeds. Leeds was my dream university. I thought I could get the grades. I really did. Now everyone I know is in university having fun and I'm here. I didn't revise a lot because I was battling depression and other stuff, I could barely get out of bed, talk to anyone in the weeks before exams. The exam pressure made it worse but I still tried my best and it didn't work out.

I then applied to uni of sofia and did the exam on saturday, I thought it went great and I did well. Turns out it wasn't good enough. But all I want to do is medicine. I dont know what to do. I think it's too late to retake the year because I'm applying so late. I also missed the UCAT exam so what do I do?

I'm so lost, I could do pharmacy with a foundation year but I'm just not interested in it at all. Should I retake and reapply - I'd get into uni at around 20/21? I'm scared I don't have it in me to retake and get a good score? What if I go through an episode again and fail?

I feel so lost right now. I don't know what to do. My mental health is going to suffer. I can't stop thinking about turning back time and revising more but I know I did all I could.

Ive never hated myself so much. Why can't I just be normal. Why could I not just have studied harder?? I wish depression didn't exist.

Don't overreact mate

I got my results in August and my whole world came crashing down. I got CDD, needed BBC for gateway medicine, had my offer for leeds. Leeds was my dream university. I thought I could get the grades. I really did. Now everyone I know is in university having fun and I'm here. I didn't revise a lot because I was battling depression and other stuff, I could barely get out of bed, talk to anyone in the weeks before exams. The exam pressure made it worse but I still tried my best and it didn't work out.

I then applied to uni of sofia and did the exam on saturday, I thought it went great and I did well. Turns out it wasn't good enough. But all I want to do is medicine. I dont know what to do. I think it's too late to retake the year because I'm applying so late. I also missed the UCAT exam so what do I do?

I'm so lost, I could do pharmacy with a foundation year but I'm just not interested in it at all. Should I retake and reapply - I'd get into uni at around 20/21? I'm scared I don't have it in me to retake and get a good score? What if I go through an episode again and fail?

I feel so lost right now. I don't know what to do. My mental health is going to suffer. I can't stop thinking about turning back time and revising more but I know I did all I could.

Ive never hated myself so much. Why can't I just be normal. Why could I not just have studied harder?? I wish depression didn't exist.

I got my results in August and my whole world came crashing down. I got CDD, needed BBC for gateway medicine, had my offer for leeds. Leeds was my dream university. I thought I could get the grades. I really did. Now everyone I know is in university having fun and I'm here. I didn't revise a lot because I was battling depression and other stuff, I could barely get out of bed, talk to anyone in the weeks before exams. The exam pressure made it worse but I still tried my best and it didn't work out.
I then applied to uni of sofia and did the exam on saturday, I thought it went great and I did well. Turns out it wasn't good enough. But all I want to do is medicine. I dont know what to do. I think it's too late to retake the year because I'm applying so late. I also missed the UCAT exam so what do I do?
I'm so lost, I could do pharmacy with a foundation year but I'm just not interested in it at all. Should I retake and reapply - I'd get into uni at around 20/21? I'm scared I don't have it in me to retake and get a good score? What if I go through an episode again and fail?
I feel so lost right now. I don't know what to do. My mental health is going to suffer. I can't stop thinking about turning back time and revising more but I know I did all I could.
Ive never hated myself so much. Why can't I just be normal. Why could I not just have studied harder?? I wish depression didn't exist.