very unhappy in uni town
Hi everyone - Im new to this site so i apologise in advance if this ends up in the wrong place. I think i just need to get everything off my chest
and if i happen to get any advice or ideas from any of you guys i would absolutely cherish that
Basically, Im a first year student in Uni of Glouctershire which means im living in Gloucester but im from Wales
. My course is pretty good so far, a lot of group work
which isnt as enjoyable for me as i learn best by myself but my class is friendly and its not making me dislike the course whatsoever.
I pretty much came to this uni because my partner of 3 years goes to a uni in gloucester and we wanted to be with each other more this year and it honestly
seemed perfect, we work so so well together and ive truly loved being with him more and pretty much living together since ive moved here. The first few weeks living
in Gloucester was incredible, i felt like my life was making an amazing change and i was becoming less anxious and depressed because i moved away from my city
and was about to start my journey of independence. i was excited and just loving life - until reality hit. Around the middle 1st month of being here, Ive became so shut off
and unhappy, im not myself whatsoever and i feel negative and hopeless. I tried figuring out what could be causing me to feel this way like is it the course? is it
how quiet my accomodation is? but no, its none of that, Its Gloucester. Honestly, each time i have left my accomodation and went into the town, I have had nothing
but negative experiences. Whether its people being extremely rude and arrogant towards me, speaking to me like im stupid, people making fun of me, people giving
me dirty looks and scowls, laughing at me, shop workers being rude. I seriously have had nothing but bad experiences when it comes to the people here. Im usually
a happy, bubbly person and i dont let things get to me often.
I LOVE wearing trendy outfits and doing my makeup etc, but i literally cannot do that here. Each time i do, i get taken the **** out
of and it just destroys my confidence and self esteem. Everyone always tells me to not take any notice and ignore it, and i did the first few times, but now
its becoming impossible to ignore - I never do my makeup and i never dress up now out of fear someones gonna say something that hurts me. I suffer from body dysmorphia
and my self esteem isnt the best as it is before coming here, ive struggled with my confidence all my life and finding who i am, and i feel like this place has
taken me back to square one with my problems. The breaking point for me was walking back to my accomodation with my partner and a group of about 9 guys decided
to push and barge into me on the pavement and 'pretend' to jump infront of my partner and i. I was having a rough day as it was, so i snapped and cursed them out
and of course they did back, i regret doing that because thats probably what they wanted but ive just had enough. Prior to this I had a problem with a train lady
who was speaking to me like i was 10 years old and being extremely patronizing all because i asked for help with a ticket problem. Its just been horrible. Im
typically a quiet person, i love making friends but im quite anxious so i dont go out of my way most of the time to socialise, so reacting back to people being
this way towards me is rare but the more i sit back and let it happen, the more depressed and pathetic im feeling. Im just not sure what to do anymore, Like i said
I do enjoy my course, and i love love love living with my partner, but i dont feel like 'me' anymore. Its like this place has sucked the life out of me. I thought
about maybe asking to see if i could transfer to a uni closer to home for my 2nd year as in 2nd year i have placements and i am truly so so scared to go out
on placement here in gloucester because of my experience with the people in my normal day to day life.
I think it would really break me entirely which is disappointing because placement was the thing i was most excited about. My uni work and life in general
is suffering because of this, i just keep telling myself if im unhappy here and scared to leave my room, whats the point in being here? me and my partner cant
exactly enjoy our experience here together if im constantly crying whenever we go out. I dont know what to do anymore. Has anyone had experiences similiar to this?
Im sorry if this all sounds really silly to be upset over, i worked really hard to get into uni as a homeschooled student and my whole experience has been
really torn apart because my confidence has been shattered. I would drop out but im not sure how paying back my maintenance loan works as i have spent a good
chunk of it lol. If anyone has any advice or thoughts whatsoever, please let me know! Anything helps at the moment, im just really lost and looking for
some sort of hope i suppose. Thank you sooo much for taking the time to read this long ass post lol
and if i happen to get any advice or ideas from any of you guys i would absolutely cherish that
Basically, Im a first year student in Uni of Glouctershire which means im living in Gloucester but im from Wales
. My course is pretty good so far, a lot of group work
which isnt as enjoyable for me as i learn best by myself but my class is friendly and its not making me dislike the course whatsoever.
I pretty much came to this uni because my partner of 3 years goes to a uni in gloucester and we wanted to be with each other more this year and it honestly
seemed perfect, we work so so well together and ive truly loved being with him more and pretty much living together since ive moved here. The first few weeks living
in Gloucester was incredible, i felt like my life was making an amazing change and i was becoming less anxious and depressed because i moved away from my city
and was about to start my journey of independence. i was excited and just loving life - until reality hit. Around the middle 1st month of being here, Ive became so shut off
and unhappy, im not myself whatsoever and i feel negative and hopeless. I tried figuring out what could be causing me to feel this way like is it the course? is it
how quiet my accomodation is? but no, its none of that, Its Gloucester. Honestly, each time i have left my accomodation and went into the town, I have had nothing
but negative experiences. Whether its people being extremely rude and arrogant towards me, speaking to me like im stupid, people making fun of me, people giving
me dirty looks and scowls, laughing at me, shop workers being rude. I seriously have had nothing but bad experiences when it comes to the people here. Im usually
a happy, bubbly person and i dont let things get to me often.
I LOVE wearing trendy outfits and doing my makeup etc, but i literally cannot do that here. Each time i do, i get taken the **** out
of and it just destroys my confidence and self esteem. Everyone always tells me to not take any notice and ignore it, and i did the first few times, but now
its becoming impossible to ignore - I never do my makeup and i never dress up now out of fear someones gonna say something that hurts me. I suffer from body dysmorphia
and my self esteem isnt the best as it is before coming here, ive struggled with my confidence all my life and finding who i am, and i feel like this place has
taken me back to square one with my problems. The breaking point for me was walking back to my accomodation with my partner and a group of about 9 guys decided
to push and barge into me on the pavement and 'pretend' to jump infront of my partner and i. I was having a rough day as it was, so i snapped and cursed them out
and of course they did back, i regret doing that because thats probably what they wanted but ive just had enough. Prior to this I had a problem with a train lady
who was speaking to me like i was 10 years old and being extremely patronizing all because i asked for help with a ticket problem. Its just been horrible. Im
typically a quiet person, i love making friends but im quite anxious so i dont go out of my way most of the time to socialise, so reacting back to people being
this way towards me is rare but the more i sit back and let it happen, the more depressed and pathetic im feeling. Im just not sure what to do anymore, Like i said
I do enjoy my course, and i love love love living with my partner, but i dont feel like 'me' anymore. Its like this place has sucked the life out of me. I thought
about maybe asking to see if i could transfer to a uni closer to home for my 2nd year as in 2nd year i have placements and i am truly so so scared to go out
on placement here in gloucester because of my experience with the people in my normal day to day life.
I think it would really break me entirely which is disappointing because placement was the thing i was most excited about. My uni work and life in general
is suffering because of this, i just keep telling myself if im unhappy here and scared to leave my room, whats the point in being here? me and my partner cant
exactly enjoy our experience here together if im constantly crying whenever we go out. I dont know what to do anymore. Has anyone had experiences similiar to this?
Im sorry if this all sounds really silly to be upset over, i worked really hard to get into uni as a homeschooled student and my whole experience has been
really torn apart because my confidence has been shattered. I would drop out but im not sure how paying back my maintenance loan works as i have spent a good
chunk of it lol. If anyone has any advice or thoughts whatsoever, please let me know! Anything helps at the moment, im just really lost and looking for
some sort of hope i suppose. Thank you sooo much for taking the time to read this long ass post lol
Reply 1
I'd suggest spending more time in and around University, should be plenty of things to do and enough places to relax outdoors. Don't let a few negative experiences put you down.
Original post by funnyinnit
Hi everyone - Im new to this site so i apologise in advance if this ends up in the wrong place. I think i just need to get everything off my chest
and if i happen to get any advice or ideas from any of you guys i would absolutely cherish that
Basically, Im a first year student in Uni of Glouctershire which means im living in Gloucester but im from Wales
. My course is pretty good so far, a lot of group work
which isnt as enjoyable for me as i learn best by myself but my class is friendly and its not making me dislike the course whatsoever.
I pretty much came to this uni because my partner of 3 years goes to a uni in gloucester and we wanted to be with each other more this year and it honestly
seemed perfect, we work so so well together and ive truly loved being with him more and pretty much living together since ive moved here. The first few weeks living
in Gloucester was incredible, i felt like my life was making an amazing change and i was becoming less anxious and depressed because i moved away from my city
and was about to start my journey of independence. i was excited and just loving life - until reality hit. Around the middle 1st month of being here, Ive became so shut off
and unhappy, im not myself whatsoever and i feel negative and hopeless. I tried figuring out what could be causing me to feel this way like is it the course? is it
how quiet my accomodation is? but no, its none of that, Its Gloucester. Honestly, each time i have left my accomodation and went into the town, I have had nothing
but negative experiences. Whether its people being extremely rude and arrogant towards me, speaking to me like im stupid, people making fun of me, people giving
me dirty looks and scowls, laughing at me, shop workers being rude. I seriously have had nothing but bad experiences when it comes to the people here. Im usually
a happy, bubbly person and i dont let things get to me often.
I LOVE wearing trendy outfits and doing my makeup etc, but i literally cannot do that here. Each time i do, i get taken the **** out
of and it just destroys my confidence and self esteem. Everyone always tells me to not take any notice and ignore it, and i did the first few times, but now
its becoming impossible to ignore - I never do my makeup and i never dress up now out of fear someones gonna say something that hurts me. I suffer from body dysmorphia
and my self esteem isnt the best as it is before coming here, ive struggled with my confidence all my life and finding who i am, and i feel like this place has
taken me back to square one with my problems. The breaking point for me was walking back to my accomodation with my partner and a group of about 9 guys decided
to push and barge into me on the pavement and 'pretend' to jump infront of my partner and i. I was having a rough day as it was, so i snapped and cursed them out
and of course they did back, i regret doing that because thats probably what they wanted but ive just had enough. Prior to this I had a problem with a train lady
who was speaking to me like i was 10 years old and being extremely patronizing all because i asked for help with a ticket problem. Its just been horrible. Im
typically a quiet person, i love making friends but im quite anxious so i dont go out of my way most of the time to socialise, so reacting back to people being
this way towards me is rare but the more i sit back and let it happen, the more depressed and pathetic im feeling. Im just not sure what to do anymore, Like i said
I do enjoy my course, and i love love love living with my partner, but i dont feel like 'me' anymore. Its like this place has sucked the life out of me. I thought
about maybe asking to see if i could transfer to a uni closer to home for my 2nd year as in 2nd year i have placements and i am truly so so scared to go out
on placement here in gloucester because of my experience with the people in my normal day to day life.
I think it would really break me entirely which is disappointing because placement was the thing i was most excited about. My uni work and life in general
is suffering because of this, i just keep telling myself if im unhappy here and scared to leave my room, whats the point in being here? me and my partner cant
exactly enjoy our experience here together if im constantly crying whenever we go out. I dont know what to do anymore. Has anyone had experiences similiar to this?
Im sorry if this all sounds really silly to be upset over, i worked really hard to get into uni as a homeschooled student and my whole experience has been
really torn apart because my confidence has been shattered. I would drop out but im not sure how paying back my maintenance loan works as i have spent a good
chunk of it lol. If anyone has any advice or thoughts whatsoever, please let me know! Anything helps at the moment, im just really lost and looking for
some sort of hope i suppose. Thank you sooo much for taking the time to read this long ass post lol
and if i happen to get any advice or ideas from any of you guys i would absolutely cherish that
Basically, Im a first year student in Uni of Glouctershire which means im living in Gloucester but im from Wales
. My course is pretty good so far, a lot of group work
which isnt as enjoyable for me as i learn best by myself but my class is friendly and its not making me dislike the course whatsoever.
I pretty much came to this uni because my partner of 3 years goes to a uni in gloucester and we wanted to be with each other more this year and it honestly
seemed perfect, we work so so well together and ive truly loved being with him more and pretty much living together since ive moved here. The first few weeks living
in Gloucester was incredible, i felt like my life was making an amazing change and i was becoming less anxious and depressed because i moved away from my city
and was about to start my journey of independence. i was excited and just loving life - until reality hit. Around the middle 1st month of being here, Ive became so shut off
and unhappy, im not myself whatsoever and i feel negative and hopeless. I tried figuring out what could be causing me to feel this way like is it the course? is it
how quiet my accomodation is? but no, its none of that, Its Gloucester. Honestly, each time i have left my accomodation and went into the town, I have had nothing
but negative experiences. Whether its people being extremely rude and arrogant towards me, speaking to me like im stupid, people making fun of me, people giving
me dirty looks and scowls, laughing at me, shop workers being rude. I seriously have had nothing but bad experiences when it comes to the people here. Im usually
a happy, bubbly person and i dont let things get to me often.
I LOVE wearing trendy outfits and doing my makeup etc, but i literally cannot do that here. Each time i do, i get taken the **** out
of and it just destroys my confidence and self esteem. Everyone always tells me to not take any notice and ignore it, and i did the first few times, but now
its becoming impossible to ignore - I never do my makeup and i never dress up now out of fear someones gonna say something that hurts me. I suffer from body dysmorphia
and my self esteem isnt the best as it is before coming here, ive struggled with my confidence all my life and finding who i am, and i feel like this place has
taken me back to square one with my problems. The breaking point for me was walking back to my accomodation with my partner and a group of about 9 guys decided
to push and barge into me on the pavement and 'pretend' to jump infront of my partner and i. I was having a rough day as it was, so i snapped and cursed them out
and of course they did back, i regret doing that because thats probably what they wanted but ive just had enough. Prior to this I had a problem with a train lady
who was speaking to me like i was 10 years old and being extremely patronizing all because i asked for help with a ticket problem. Its just been horrible. Im
typically a quiet person, i love making friends but im quite anxious so i dont go out of my way most of the time to socialise, so reacting back to people being
this way towards me is rare but the more i sit back and let it happen, the more depressed and pathetic im feeling. Im just not sure what to do anymore, Like i said
I do enjoy my course, and i love love love living with my partner, but i dont feel like 'me' anymore. Its like this place has sucked the life out of me. I thought
about maybe asking to see if i could transfer to a uni closer to home for my 2nd year as in 2nd year i have placements and i am truly so so scared to go out
on placement here in gloucester because of my experience with the people in my normal day to day life.
I think it would really break me entirely which is disappointing because placement was the thing i was most excited about. My uni work and life in general
is suffering because of this, i just keep telling myself if im unhappy here and scared to leave my room, whats the point in being here? me and my partner cant
exactly enjoy our experience here together if im constantly crying whenever we go out. I dont know what to do anymore. Has anyone had experiences similiar to this?
Im sorry if this all sounds really silly to be upset over, i worked really hard to get into uni as a homeschooled student and my whole experience has been
really torn apart because my confidence has been shattered. I would drop out but im not sure how paying back my maintenance loan works as i have spent a good
chunk of it lol. If anyone has any advice or thoughts whatsoever, please let me know! Anything helps at the moment, im just really lost and looking for
some sort of hope i suppose. Thank you sooo much for taking the time to read this long ass post lol
Hey. I’m sorry this has been your experience. You don’t deserve to be denied the basic respect of being a fellow human being which is something I honestly get because people also behave like that towards me in my uni town ( reading, an absolute s***hole btw NEVER come here) and it’s v disheartening. I also stopped dressing up and putting on makeup because of continual negative experiences when I was out. People are AWFUL okay, and they have zero regard for how they treat others - they will happily scapegoat and bully one person if it means that they can feel better about their miserable lives. Your fears are so valid and your concerns are real, at the same time you do not deserve to be forced to think you have to live on eggshells and sacrifice your happiness because of this. I know gloucester is the most dangerous and rough town in Gloucestershire if that helps, n might explain why people are so shite there. The shop workers are dire here, unbelievably rude and constantly trying to just look better than you and the town is an embarrassment full of dirty streets, pollution, depressed sods and of course, a lot of very very rude and unpleasant people who think it’s okay to bscly bully and chastise a random young girl who is often by herself. Not everyone is like this, and you will find a couple of people who agree with you and have had similar experiences if you look but just know that hoe you feel is real and common, and you aren’t alone! Maybe talk to your partner ? Can they help or go out with you a few times so they can witness how awful people are? Which btw I 100% believe without a doubt after coming to Reading. I did not see the true horrors of human nature before I came here. If it helps I’ve literally had to run home after a creepy crackhead lady tried to follow me at 3am, had some really weird men harass me, and constantly feel oversexualised and uncomfortable. Remember that your life is YOUR business and no one elses and if they try to get in the way or bother you or second guess that j get tf away from them because they’re just a **** not worth it. Good luck queen, and remember to do what is best for you!
Ps sorry i know this is like a year late
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