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My friends mum forces her to wear a mask at home and in school

So this girl I'm friends with she is forced to wear a mask by her mum the whole day in school and when she is at home, her mum actually got fined more than once for keeping her off school over the paranoia of the Coronavirus, surely this is unhealthy and borderline child abuse?
Reply 1
The law is the law. If she got fined more than once for keeping her off school, she shouldn't be doing that. There's a point when children need to be educated.

As for masks? That's personal preference. If you don't know why her mum forces her to wear a mask, don't assume bad reasons. Maybe her mum (or someone else in their family) is immunocompromised, or will otherwise get hit harder by COVID. If your school is mostly indoors and not well-ventilated, wearing a mask is reasonable.
Hard one to answer tbh. She does have the best intentions for her daughter, but it's rooted in media scaremongering. Covid isn't nearly is deadly as the government & media said it was, the ratio of recovered cases & deaths proves that. And that's before even mentioning the fact that deaths with Covid were counted as the official Covid death statistic (you can see this on the BBC, in small text under the "death count"), when in actual fact the number of people who died from Covid is much lower. There's people who are going to call me a conspiracy theorist for this, I can assure you that I've been called that many times before.

Best thing to do is for you friend to simply refuse to wear the mask. That's it really.
I am a bit shocked that people are still paranoid about a glorified flu, man :bird:
Masks are personal preference. My daughter wears one to college.
No it's not child abuse, don't be so dramatic.
Original post by PinkMobilePhone
Masks are personal preference. My daughter wears one to college.
No it's not child abuse, don't be so dramatic.


Forcing a child to wear a mask all day at school as well as at home in the UK in December 2022 IS child abuse.

Child abuse comes in many forms. And many levels of severity.
This child abuse isn't as bad as torture leading to death. But it's still child abuse.

If the parent has been doing this and keeping the child off school for insufficiently good reason, what else is going on behind closed doors? Icebergs and tips of.

What punishment is given or is being threatened to be given by the parent to make the child conform to this mask rule?

This is a tricky one for the original poster. Because what can he or she do to combat this abuse?
About the best I can think of is to support the friend. Try to build up the friend's self esteem. Be there to listen to and discuss in a mature manner anything the friend wants to talk about.
Original post by Dunnig Kruger
Forcing a child to wear a mask all day at school as well as at home in the UK in December 2022 IS child abuse.

Child abuse comes in many forms. And many levels of severity.
This child abuse isn't as bad as torture leading to death. But it's still child abuse.

If the parent has been doing this and keeping the child off school for insufficiently good reason, what else is going on behind closed doors? Icebergs and tips of.

What punishment is given or is being threatened to be given by the parent to make the child conform to this mask rule?

This is a tricky one for the original poster. Because what can he or she do to combat this abuse?
About the best I can think of is to support the friend. Try to build up the friend's self esteem. Be there to listen to and discuss in a mature manner anything the friend wants to talk about.

Maybe the mum is concerned about the child catching Strep-A or Covid.
Maybe there is a vulnerable relative living in the house.

You can't just throw around "it's child abuse" without knowing the full story. Trying to keep a child safe is not child abuse.

I agree it's overkill having them wear one in the house as well as at school - if they're wearing one at school there shouldn't really be any need to wear one at home...
but if the mother is trying to look after her family's health, it's a far cry from the mindset of a child abuser, even if she's going somewhat overboard.
How is she supposed to enforce mask wearing in school? Your friend could just take it off when she's in school.
Original post by PinkMobilePhone
Maybe the mum is concerned about the child catching Strep-A or Covid.
Maybe there is a vulnerable relative living in the house.

You can't just throw around "it's child abuse" without knowing the full story. Trying to keep a child safe is not child abuse.

I agree it's overkill having them wear one in the house as well as at school - if they're wearing one at school there shouldn't really be any need to wear one at home...
but if the mother is trying to look after her family's health, it's a far cry from the mindset of a child abuser, even if she's going somewhat overboard.


The reasons behind the abuse are immaterial as to whether it's abuse or not.

Abuse is abuse. And making a child wear a mask all day at school as well as at home, under threat of some sort of punishment is child abuse.

You stated "No it's not child abuse, don't be so dramatic." So you think it's OK for you to categorically state that it's not child abuse, and then you chastise me with "You can't just throw around "it's child abuse" without knowing the full story."?
How hypocritical is that?

Original post by hungrysalamander
How is she supposed to enforce mask wearing in school? Your friend could just take it off when she's in school.


Most likely explanation is that the child is under fear of severe punishment if she breaks the parental mask wearing rule.

As I've already mentioned, there could be a large iceberg of abuse going on here, and the mask rules are just the tip of it.

It's certainly worth the original poster gathering what evidence he or she reasonably can as to the extent of the abuse going on here and then to make a decision on what to do with that info. EG do nothing. Or take it to social services.
Original post by Dunnig Kruger
The reasons behind the abuse are immaterial as to whether it's abuse or not.

Abuse is abuse. And making a child wear a mask all day at school as well as at home, under threat of some sort of punishment is child abuse.

You stated "No it's not child abuse, don't be so dramatic." So you think it's OK for you to categorically state that it's not child abuse, and then you chastise me with "You can't just throw around "it's child abuse" without knowing the full story."?
How hypocritical is that?

You're literally putting words in the OP's mouth. Where does it say that it's "under threat of some sort of punishment"? You're making that up entirely yourself.

If it is done TO PUNISH the child, that's a different story, (and although you're insinuating to the contrary you have no proof of that at all, hence my comment about not knowing the full story), however nothing about the OP suggests that this is the case, but rather that it's the mother's concern for the health of her family, on which basis I stick to my assertation that it is not abuse.

Your ridiculous notion that "the reasons behind the abuse are immaterial as to whether it's abuse or not" is utter nonsense.
Sticking a needle in someone to make them cry is abuse. Sticking a needle in someone to prevent them from catching a disease is not abuse.
Stabbing a pen into someone's throat to harm them is abuse. Stabbing a pen into someone's throat to help them breathe is not abuse.
Spanking your wife because you're a kinky couple is not abuse. Spanking your wife because you came home drunk and felt like beating her up, is abuse.

If it's abuse to make someone wear a mask, then Boris Johnson abused the entire country. Nurses and doctors must be being abused all the time at work!
Original post by PinkMobilePhone
You're literally putting words in the OP's mouth. Where does it say that it's "under threat of some sort of punishment"? You're making that up entirely yourself.

If it is done TO PUNISH the child, that's a different story, (and although you're insinuating to the contrary you have no proof of that at all, hence my comment about not knowing the full story), however nothing about the OP suggests that this is the case, but rather that it's the mother's concern for the health of her family, on which basis I stick to my assertation that it is not abuse.

Your ridiculous notion that "the reasons behind the abuse are immaterial as to whether it's abuse or not" is utter nonsense.
Sticking a needle in someone to make them cry is abuse. Sticking a needle in someone to prevent them from catching a disease is not abuse.
Stabbing a pen into someone's throat to harm them is abuse. Stabbing a pen into someone's throat to help them breathe is not abuse.
Spanking your wife because you're a kinky couple is not abuse. Spanking your wife because you came home drunk and felt like beating her up, is abuse.

If it's abuse to make someone wear a mask, then Boris Johnson abused the entire country. Nurses and doctors must be being abused all the time at work!

"Where does it say that it's "under threat of some sort of punishment"?"
The first line of the opening post says "So this girl I'm friends with she is forced to wear a mask.." In the context of the situation described in the opening post, how do you think the child is forced to wear a mask? Do you think that the school in question is Hogwarts and the mother casts a mask clinging spell every morning? Do you think that the mother superglues the mask to the child every morning?

This appears to be a reading comprehension failure in 2 parts by you. I find that disappointing, given your status as a member of the Volunteer Team of this forum.
Failure 1. The original post saying that the child was forced to wear a mask at school.
Failure 2. I said "Most likely explanation is that the child is under fear of severe punishment if she breaks the parental mask wearing rule"
That's not me putting words into anyone's mouth. If anything it's me being understated. Because it's not a most likely explanation it's more of an almost definitely.

If a possible abuse type situation is described in an inaccurate way or a misleading way, it may not actually be abuse. It's quite valid to decide that something wasn't abuse on the basis of a misleading or inaccurate description. It is not valid to say that abuse isn't abuse because of the reasons behind the abuse in the mind of the abuser. So that:
"Sticking a needle in someone to make them cry is abuse. Sticking a needle in someone to prevent them from catching a disease is not abuse."
It would be misleading to describe a valid vaccination as sticking a needle into someone to make them cry.
"Stabbing a pen into someone's throat to harm them is abuse. Stabbing a pen into someone's throat to help them breathe is not abuse."
It would be a lie to describe giving someone a much needed tracheostomy as stabbing a pen into their throat to harm them.

In other words, abuse or not abuse is down to exactly what is happening. It is not down to the reasons why it is happening in the mind of the person dishing out the abuse.
I am strongly against any form of abuse being excused as being OK because there's a (supposedly) good reason for it. Mainly because of all of the examples from history where severe abuse has been justified on the basis of it being in a "good" cause.

Boris Johnson? You want to bring political discussion into a thread in the Relationships section of this forum?
Original post by Dunnig Kruger
The reasons behind the abuse are immaterial as to whether it's abuse or not.

Abuse is abuse. And making a child wear a mask all day at school as well as at home, under threat of some sort of punishment is child abuse.

You stated "No it's not child abuse, don't be so dramatic." So you think it's OK for you to categorically state that it's not child abuse, and then you chastise me with "You can't just throw around "it's child abuse" without knowing the full story."?
How hypocritical is that?



Most likely explanation is that the child is under fear of severe punishment if she breaks the parental mask wearing rule.

As I've already mentioned, there could be a large iceberg of abuse going on here, and the mask rules are just the tip of it.

It's certainly worth the original poster gathering what evidence he or she reasonably can as to the extent of the abuse going on here and then to make a decision on what to do with that info. EG do nothing. Or take it to social services.


As it happens she is threatened with punishment if she doesn't comply
Original post by Dunnig Kruger
"Where does it say that it's "under threat of some sort of punishment"?"
The first line of the opening post says "So this girl I'm friends with she is forced to wear a mask.." In the context of the situation described in the opening post, how do you think the child is forced to wear a mask? Do you think that the school in question is Hogwarts and the mother casts a mask clinging spell every morning? Do you think that the mother superglues the mask to the child every morning?

This appears to be a reading comprehension failure in 2 parts by you. I find that disappointing, given your status as a member of the Volunteer Team of this forum.
Failure 1. The original post saying that the child was forced to wear a mask at school.
Failure 2. I said "Most likely explanation is that the child is under fear of severe punishment if she breaks the parental mask wearing rule"
That's not me putting words into anyone's mouth. If anything it's me being understated. Because it's not a most likely explanation it's more of an almost definitely.

If a possible abuse type situation is described in an inaccurate way or a misleading way, it may not actually be abuse. It's quite valid to decide that something wasn't abuse on the basis of a misleading or inaccurate description. It is not valid to say that abuse isn't abuse because of the reasons behind the abuse in the mind of the abuser. So that:
"Sticking a needle in someone to make them cry is abuse. Sticking a needle in someone to prevent them from catching a disease is not abuse."
It would be misleading to describe a valid vaccination as sticking a needle into someone to make them cry.
"Stabbing a pen into someone's throat to harm them is abuse. Stabbing a pen into someone's throat to help them breathe is not abuse."
It would be a lie to describe giving someone a much needed tracheostomy as stabbing a pen into their throat to harm them.

In other words, abuse or not abuse is down to exactly what is happening. It is not down to the reasons why it is happening in the mind of the person dishing out the abuse.
I am strongly against any form of abuse being excused as being OK because there's a (supposedly) good reason for it. Mainly because of all of the examples from history where severe abuse has been justified on the basis of it being in a "good" cause.

Boris Johnson? You want to bring political discussion into a thread in the Relationships section of this forum?

PRSOM
Original post by username5319484
How is she supposed to enforce mask wearing in school? Your friend could just take it off when she's in school.

my parents just recently found out i was not wearing a mask at school by emailing my parents and now they have taken me out of school and they took my phone so i mean they have their ways

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