How long should a couple be going out before having sex?

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katiesado
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#261
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#261
yeah it definitely is dependent on if you feel ready. if you feel pressured you shouldn't do it.

otherwise i think it depends on how old you are and how much experience you have. for example a virgin having sex with a new boyfriend after a few weeks might seem too fast and a 25 year old woman whose had 7 boyfriends waiting 3 months might seem a bit slow. in the end it shouldn't matter how it seems its just important to remember that sex changes the dynamics of a relationship so you should be mature enough to expect it and know each other well enough to deal with it.
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amo1
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#262
i think some people rush it and that ur never 100% ready
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Powersymphonia
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(Original post by THE PROPHETOR!)
Hey guys

How long should a couple be going out before having sex?

Just interested...

Jason
I don't believe in sex before marriage. Sex is to be valued as special and should only be engaged in with the creation of children in mind. I don't mind what other ppl think about this issue as I respect the views of others and this is my personal view and this view I treasure deeply and I intend to stick to this rule within my life regardless of it's consequences.
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Alice2411
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there is no actual time. a lot of girls prefer to wait (i kinda do 4 this reason) because it makes us feel less like sluts! but u should only ever do it when u feel it is completly right.
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Alice2411
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#265
(Original post by technik)
not everyones a sorry little slut like you
thats a horrible thing to say. what a pr*k
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Flicker
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(Original post by THE PROPHETOR!)
Hey guys

How long should a couple be going out before having sex?

Just interested...

Jason
i used to say always at least 3 months. but then i decided you just know when it feels right. my boyfriend and i had sex after 3 weeks - we're still together now 19 months on. so i think as long as you feel secure and comfortable with it then it's ok. and you're using protection, of course.
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fasterpurple
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(Original post by Alice2411)
there is no actual time. a lot of girls prefer to wait (i kinda do 4 this reason) because it makes us feel less like sluts! but u should only ever do it when u feel it is completly right.
Why should having sex make you feel like a slut? Sex is a celebration of our bodies and should empower women - you are allowing a loved one into the most sacred part of your body and that is not something that should be taken lightly, therefore I cannot understand how you can think that sex makes you slutty, regardless of how quickly or slowly it occurs.
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SamTheMan
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(Original post by Alice2411)
there is no actual time. a lot of girls prefer to wait (i kinda do 4 this reason) because it makes us feel less like sluts! but u should only ever do it when u feel it is completly right.
It certainly shouldn't make you feel slutty. There's nothing dirty/slutty about sleeping with someone you care about. What you've got to be careful about if you want a serious, stable relationship with a guy, where sex isn't the only thing, is that he's not going to perceive you in a way you don't want to be: basically the guy might just end up seeing you as his means to have sex full stop and if you don't want that to be the only reason why he stays with you (or breaks up with you), you're right, you have to tread lightly.
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Helenia
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(Original post by Mad Caddie)
:rolleyes: The morning-after pill is the best thing since condoms.
The morning after pill should NOT be a regular form of contraception.
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Trousers
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Slightly off-topic, but it's a thing that interested me having read these posts:

A quick question for those who don't believe in sex before marriage, and those who think you should wait a long time (say, six months or so) before having sex: What do you think of people who have sex outside of marriage, or after a week of knowing each other?

Do you disapprove? Do you assume some kind of psychological trauma or defect and pity them? Are you jealous of their ability to separate sex and moral obligation? Or do you take no interest?
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visesh
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(Original post by Mad Caddie)
:rolleyes: The morning-after pill is the best thing since condoms.

Personally, I think people should only have sex in stable relationships, it counts for a lot more then, and the worry of STI's etc is reduced. Also, I think people should wait till they are at least 16+ before having sex, for the same reasons timeofyourlife has outlined.
SO would YOU, a GUY, take one if a condom split to protect yourself from an STI?
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Trousers
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(Original post by visesh)
SO would YOU, a GUY, take one if a condom split to protect yourself from an STI?
...or to prevent your girlfriend from getting pregnant? Oh no, you can't can you? That's obviously why you're so chuffed about them - you're not the one who has to take them and get sick.
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visesh
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#273
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#273
(Original post by Mad Caddie)
Take what?
Morning after pill
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puppy
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(Original post by Alice2411)
thats a horrible thing to say. what a pr*k
Says you, you just suggested youself that girls sleeping with guys too soon was "slutty". What do you actually think? If you think that it is slutty then don't expect people not to call girls who do it, sluts.
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Harv616
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#275
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#275
wow this thread is still going.......
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frost105
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#276
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Sex is totally dependant on the person. I think people should wait till they are old enough to appreciate the consequences. Plus 16 is the legal age and personally I think its a good benchmark. However what irritates me are people who dont use contraception, or just use the pill. Even if you get into a relationship with someone, get sti checks before you stop using condoms!!!
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Harv616
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(Original post by Mad Caddie)
Erm, there is no morning after pill for guys, but if there was, I'd take it.
Hmmmmmmmmmmm a morning after pill for guys...............theres a new idea :stupido2:
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caffecooki
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it depends on the couple and the situation i suppose, it's just when u both feel ready!! i'd probably say more than a day if u wanted a proper relationship :p:
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visesh
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(Original post by Mad Caddie)
Erm, there is no morning after pill for guys, but if there was, I'd take it.
That was the point of my post.
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Mrs_F
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(Original post by need_money)
You say that as if i'm the only person under 16 having sex. :confused: I can assure you i'm not. I know girls who have been having sex since they were 11!
OMG I don't think I knew what sex was when I was 11! It's an awful thought that children have sex, it's quite sick, 11 is far too young. I was still playing with dolls at 11. I was so innocent.
I agree with everyone else, it totally depends on the person, their beliefs, experience, their needs, the other person in the relationship, on how soon they have sex. Everyone is different, and I don't suppose it matters how soon or late you have sex, as long as the time is right for both people.
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