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poetry Competion watch

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    Right now, here is the premise, you post up some of your poetry, I judge it and the winner gets a grand total of 89 pos rep.

    Just as a little point, ppoetry does not have to rhyme, so anything in verse which is your own will be accepted.

    Also, only one poem per person, if you want to post more than one, put the extras here

    The thread will be closed at 9pm GMT for judging and the winner will be announced tomorrow at some point.

    The entries:

    Ladyshort4U
    Iluvatar
    Sublime envy
    lessthanthree
    shootingstar
    Trousers
    Eeyore
    Profesh
    Saiyamana
    Dreama
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    hmmm im crap at poetry....but ill try...later tho
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    Beauties thorn, a rose, a figure
    To often used and spoke with vigor,
    by cliche'd so called masters start
    to break traditions, break a heart
    but not in terms of sunshine story
    or illusion in a misplaced glory
    In ways of what we see and hear
    but words not meant to tell or fear
    but tell a tale the tears belong
    to those who've spend their whole lives wrong
    and focused on literal speach
    it matters of the life they preach
    across the boundaries we created
    a community of difference hated
    a hero with a standing call
    of hope, to wish, to see it fall
    but true heros are not known as so
    their life they live, from life they go
    but leave behind which unknown where
    the hope we feel and do not share


    Its not v good, but its different at least

    (so wiwarin doesn't have to change the link, this is the one i wanted people to judge me on)
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    Excellent, one poem in, that should be pretty easy to judge.
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    Ok this is a poem which I wrote a long time ago and no1 except my boyfriend has read it - I guess I am sometimes embarrassed by my writing and prefer to keep it to myself - but I guess I'll let it out in the open now and let's see what you guys think...Please don't comment if you don't like it because I'm really sensitive when it come's to my writing...Thanx guys

    here goes...

    A sad and twisted thought
    Came upon my mind
    Something so sadistic
    That should be left behind

    I thought about those
    Who have died so soon
    And what I was doing
    When they met their doom

    And I thought about myself
    About my blood and my tears
    Living with nothing but pain
    And my tormented fears

    And I noticed something
    That just didn't seem right
    Something to make you cry
    And shiver in the night

    Every time you smile
    Another child cries
    Every time you're happy
    Another person dies

    When every thing's going right
    And it's the best day of your life
    Someone out there has had enough
    And is picking up that knife

    Every time you have someone
    Another person is alone
    Every time you feel loved
    Another child is on their own

    When your parents are hugging you
    And showering you with kisses
    Some child out there is being beaten
    By parents who are making death wishes

    Every time you see the light
    Another child only sees the dark
    Every time you are healthy
    Another person is cutting a fresh mark

    So remember this next time
    You're have a good day
    Another someone out there
    Is dieing in some way
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    The morning rain is sweeping down, bringing around
    All of the sleepers from their dreams of things undone
    You walk across from me and sit down, stirring around
    The thoughts of things that you could never say out loud

    I tried in vain so hard to repair, hoping you'd care
    Hope dissipated leaving nothing but despair
    You tried in vain so hard to be fair, trying to share
    How could I overlook a precious love so rare

    Your thoughts reflect in a greeting gone stale
    Feelings project in the gray you exhale
    You haunt my mind like a memory betrayed
    And soon with the sun like the mist you will fade

    The spring will come and flowers will bloom, exit the gloom
    But still a shroud will always linger in your room
    Visions replay the night that you left, hollow and deaf
    Did you forgive me under the cover of your breath?
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    That was truely beautiful yet very haunting at the same time. I commend thee Ladyshort4U.
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    (Original post by wiwarin_mir)
    That was truely beautiful yet very haunting at the same time. I commend thee Ladyshort4U.
    Thank you!
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    wow, these poems are so good.
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    I have a lot more although I haven't written since I was 15. That particular poem I wrote when I was 14.
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    Good lord, why is everyone so miserable? Can't you write a poem about Jimbo The Happy Cod or something?
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    (Original post by Trousers)
    Good lord, why is everyone so miserable? Can't you write a poem about Jimbo The Happy Cod or something?
    Well make a peom about jimbo the happy cod and enter it then.
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    As i can't be bothered to find anything else better, i may as well copy this one from the articles section...


    The words they spread like fire, represent the sentence
    A sentence of a lifetime without love it gives to me
    Its me who has to build and express my false repentence
    Because repentence isn't given to those who cannot see
    I can't see extending lifetimes of missed chances i created
    In creation loss of hope and a spirit all but gone
    Gone from aching hearts, spent emotion still negated
    Which negated love spend cruelty, with no place that i belong

    Edit: Not the one i wanted to be judged on
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    Tears are something deeper than rain.
    They're sometimes used to hide a pain.
    A high, a low, who knows what's next?
    That's why tears erupt from the chest.
    Maybe your life is clustered with drama.
    Your tears are falling for the end of the saga.
    Or maybe you tears are for up above,
    Because you keep falling in and out of love.
    Maybe for the pleasure and shear delight,
    Of running through Autumn's trees the day after tonight.
    A sentimental message written in the sand.
    The sweet smell of wish, isn't it grand.
    Tears really are something deeper than rain.
    But they are not always used to hide the pain.
    Yesterday I cried eight tiny ivory teardrops, how could I forget.
    But this time I was crying over innocent regret.
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    how about a musing? I am much better at those
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    (Original post by sublime_envy)
    how about a musing? I am much better at those
    you can, but only one poem can be entered, so you would have to choose which one you were going to put forward.
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    Only one I could find at the mo... wrote it about 6 months ago...

    Dry your eyes
    The world hasn't ended yet
    It's not time
    For you to leave it behind
    It's so hard
    To pretend you're alright
    But fake it
    They can't tell anyway

    Maybe you'll try
    And convince them that you're fine
    Maybe they'll see
    That all of your smiles are lies
    But smile a lie
    And lie again just one more time
    Maybe one day
    Happiness won't be a lie
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    (Original post by wiwarin_mir)
    you can, but only one poem can be entered, so you would have to choose which one you were going to put forward.
    whoops I just reread your post
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    My first poem released on TSR

    How can i compare the uncomparable
    Who fixed a heart so unrepairable
    Made me believe in a new tomorrow.
    An angel that dispels my sorrow.
    For true description no words exist,
    they pale, and fade. I cant resist
    the spell you cast upon my heart.
    To feel your presence, fear departs,
    Because i ask "so what is fear?"
    The one reply "when your not here",
    But fear is why i cannot say
    To you just that i feel this way.
    My guardian angel, my shining light,
    you give me strength, the will to fight,
    to stand, and not to fear the fall.
    You own my heart, you are my all.
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    I can't decide which poem to submit
 
 
 
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