The Student Room Group

imposter syndrome for place at uni?

i recently got a place on a foundation year at my dream uni (it is a competitive uni) for a competitive subject. i was super proud of myself, especially considering the fact that in the last few years i have had a lot of difficult circumstances that led to me underachieving in my a levels.

the issue is, im starting to feel like i dont deserve it. i went to a private school for my a levels, i am not financially disadvantaged at all, and when i told my friend that i had got in and i was so excited (this friend is alr at uni, achieved all A*s and went to the same school) they were telling me that it’s unfair that im taking up a place for a ‘student who needs it and that i didn’t get the grades so i should be paying the price.

for context, i am a very hard working person. i would prefer not to share details, but i have had some ongoing experiences that genuinely have led to my education being disrupted (in addition to having a late diagnosis of adhd that had an impact on a lot of my learning) i should have been achieving A*s, and my teachers knew this, but i carried a lot of weight on my shoulders that was a constant distraction from my education, and unfortunately led to my attendance at school dropping (even though I completed as much work as possible, was known as a ‘smart’ student who other students would ask for help etc)

I applied for a foundation year as a transition, and as it seemed like a way to attend my dream university despite underachieving in my a levels. The university were very selective in how they chose the students for the course, and genuinely read through our situations etc.

I’m now feeling stuck: what my friend said to me has led to me feeling like I don’t deserve my spot at this university and that I should attend a less prestigious uni because my grades were what I achieved despite having a private education from a good school.

Is it unfair that I have a place?

Reply 1

Congratulations on your place!!

I've only one thing to say. You absolutely deserved it. Don't let your "friend" make you believe otherwise. I don't think they're a very good "friend" tbh. They should be celebrating with you. You worked hard, life happens, but the admissions still liked and chose you.

Don't think about it again and best of luck next year 😀

Reply 2

Why attach more weight to the view of one undergraduate than to the views of a group of academics at a well regarded university who have decided to offer you a Foundation course?

Ignore your friend's comments on this issue.

Reply 3

I have a feeling it’s the foundation year at Oxford 😂 congrats tho
Original post by creammaster
i recently got a place on a foundation year at my dream uni (it is a competitive uni) for a competitive subject. i was super proud of myself, especially considering the fact that in the last few years i have had a lot of difficult circumstances that led to me underachieving in my a levels.
the issue is, im starting to feel like i dont deserve it. i went to a private school for my a levels, i am not financially disadvantaged at all, and when i told my friend that i had got in and i was so excited (this friend is alr at uni, achieved all A*s and went to the same school) they were telling me that it’s unfair that im taking up a place for a ‘student who needs it and that i didn’t get the grades so i should be paying the price.
for context, i am a very hard working person. i would prefer not to share details, but i have had some ongoing experiences that genuinely have led to my education being disrupted (in addition to having a late diagnosis of adhd that had an impact on a lot of my learning) i should have been achieving A*s, and my teachers knew this, but i carried a lot of weight on my shoulders that was a constant distraction from my education, and unfortunately led to my attendance at school dropping (even though I completed as much work as possible, was known as a ‘smart’ student who other students would ask for help etc)
I applied for a foundation year as a transition, and as it seemed like a way to attend my dream university despite underachieving in my a levels. The university were very selective in how they chose the students for the course, and genuinely read through our situations etc.
I’m now feeling stuck: what my friend said to me has led to me feeling like I don’t deserve my spot at this university and that I should attend a less prestigious uni because my grades were what I achieved despite having a private education from a good school.
Is it unfair that I have a place?

@creammaster

Unfortunately, you will find people in life who are jealous and bitter when you succeed, but what makes this more painful is when these people are supposed to be your friends. It hurts! Whether it stems from their own insecurity or just because they feel like life has been tougher for them or they don't like it when others seem to have things easier (no one really knows the difficulties people have) you really should not be feel bad for achieving your goal!

It's so important to surround yourself with people who are a positive influence in your life!. It doesn't mean that they should give you feedback that you always agree with, but when someone is for you and wants the best for you, you will know that when they do have something negative to say they will speak from a place of love. It doesn't sound like your friend was doing that!

Congrats on your success 😀😀😀!

Oluwatosin 3rd year student University of Huddersfield

Reply 5

Original post by University of Huddersfield
@creammaster
Unfortunately, you will find people in life who are jealous and bitter when you succeed, but what makes this more painful is when these people are supposed to be your friends. It hurts! Whether it stems from their own insecurity or just because they feel like life has been tougher for them or they don't like it when others seem to have things easier (no one really knows the difficulties people have) you really should not be feel bad for achieving your goal!
It's so important to surround yourself with people who are a positive influence in your life!. It doesn't mean that they should give you feedback that you always agree with, but when someone is for you and wants the best for you, you will know that when they do have something negative to say they will speak from a place of love. It doesn't sound like your friend was doing that!
Congrats on your success 😀😀😀!
Oluwatosin 3rd year student University of Huddersfield

Hello Oluwatosin, you consistently post positive and sensible things. I'm sure that many students here find your observations very helpful. I wish you well in your studies. Have you decided on what you might do after you graduate?
(edited 1 year ago)
Original post by Stiffy Byng
Hello Oluwatosin, you consistently post positive and sensible things. I'm sure that many students here find your observations very helpful. I wish you well in your studies. Have you decided on what you might do after you graduate?

@Stiffy Byng

Thank you 😊 (!) that's really nice of you to say 🥰! I appreciate your kind words!!!

I plan to work as a podiatrist 🙃!

Hope you are doing okay,

Oluwatosin 3rd year student University of Huddersfield

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