The Student Room Group

Feels impossible to get a girlfriend

Hi guys 27M I feel like it is taking me a long time to get a girlfriend. I do focus on myself and try and plan my life out on what the next chapter is and see where it will take me. I go to the gym groom myself well, but all I keep thinking to myself when am I going to kiss a girl or have relationship.

But it never seems to happen as people say it will happen when you least expect which I’m quite tired of hearing from as it never happens. But I try not to be too negative about I do enjoy being single for the time being but sometimes I like to be involved with a girl. I am just very awkward with girls but I’m working on my confidence.
Reply 1
So what are you actively doing to meet a woman?
Reply 2
Original post by Gazpacho.
So what are you actively doing to meet a woman?

I second this. 😭

Haha my brother is like mid 20s and he keeps complaining that there are no "good women" out there. However, his type looks like those white girls who go to the club. He says all girls are just ho3s nowadays. I tell him that if he wants a non-clubbing girl who doesn't get drunk and act promiscuous, he should go look in the library or idk a bible club.
He just refuses to listen. It's impossible to find an orca in a lake.
Reply 3
Original post by Anonymous
I second this. 😭
Haha my brother is like mid 20s and he keeps complaining that there are no "good women" out there. However, his type looks like those white girls who go to the club. He says all girls are just ho3s nowadays. I tell him that if he wants a non-clubbing girl who doesn't get drunk and act promiscuous, he should go look in the library or idk a bible club.
He just refuses to listen. It's impossible to find an orca in a lake.

I live in a remote area in the countryside not a lot of of women you’d meet unless you are living in the city which I will be living this September. But I have pretty much given up meeting girls as I go everywhere I go when I go do different countries and nothing doesn’t happen so in terms hoping to find a girlfriend I have given up as just doesn’t happen for me.
Reply 4
Original post by Anonymous
I live in a remote area in the countryside not a lot of of women you’d meet unless you are living in the city which I will be living this September. But I have pretty much given up meeting girls as I go everywhere I go when I go do different countries and nothing doesn’t happen so in terms hoping to find a girlfriend I have given up as just doesn’t happen for me.

Well, if you walk around with that attitude, finding a girl will most likely not happen. ☹️
Don't lose hope!

I'm going to tell you what I told my brother: always keep your heart and mind open, go about your life, improve yourself and get yourself ready for a potential relationship. But never close yourself to the possibility. When you become confident in yourself and your life, when you are approachable, it will come.

Anyways, you're going to the city next year! There are so many new opportunities and encounters waiting for you there! But ask yourself, are YOU ready for these potential encounters? Do you have what people are looking for? If not, there's still time to work on it. Furthermore, if you spend your time with your eyes glued to your phone, airpods in, head down, and mostly in your room...the chances of meeting someone--not even a girl--just anyone, is very low. Go out, have fun, talk with everyone, make friends, and you'll definitely find someone.

Lastly, the most important step to getting a significant other: ASK! Just ask. Without making a move, you'll never get into a relationship. It's ok to get rejected. It develops character and every no means a new opportunity. If you're a good person, you have a good personality and humour, you go out of your way to make friends and ask people out, I guarantee that you will find a relationship sooner or later. (Some) People are just desperate as you! You just have to find them.🙂
Reply 5
But OP, remember, it's ok to be single. There is so much more to life than getting a gf. Live for yourself, go experience new things. Friends can sometimes be even better than a gf. Marriage is not the end all be all. Not having a gf doesn't make you less of a person or man.

However OP, if you really crave it, I would recommend you to attempt to be less awkward. I can assure you that girls aren't that scary. Most of us just don't talk to guys unless they talk to us first. (At least that's me) Just develop your own confidence and make friends. You'll find a girl eventually if you do so. Remember, if you want it badly--you only live once so why not just shed your awkwardness and adopt a new person in the city? Who cares if you embarrass yourself one time? No one's going to remember that after a few years (probably). Don't let your awkwardness hinder your life.
Reply 6
Original post by Anonymous
But OP, remember, it's ok to be single. There is so much more to life than getting a gf. Live for yourself, go experience new things. Friends can sometimes be even better than a gf. Marriage is not the end all be all. Not having a gf doesn't make you less of a person or man.
However OP, if you really crave it, I would recommend you to attempt to be less awkward. I can assure you that girls aren't that scary. Most of us just don't talk to guys unless they talk to us first. (At least that's me) Just develop your own confidence and make friends. You'll find a girl eventually if you do so. Remember, if you want it badly--you only live once so why not just shed your awkwardness and adopt a new person in the city? Who cares if you embarrass yourself one time? No one's going to remember that after a few years (probably). Don't let your awkwardness hinder your life.

*Adopt a new persona 😭😭😭 please don't go adopting a person Bahahah sorry.
so im going to assume the OP has never had a GF
Reply 8
Original post by Anonymous
But OP, remember, it's ok to be single. There is so much more to life than getting a gf. Live for yourself, go experience new things. Friends can sometimes be even better than a gf. Marriage is not the end all be all. Not having a gf doesn't make you less of a person or man.
However OP, if you really crave it, I would recommend you to attempt to be less awkward. I can assure you that girls aren't that scary. Most of us just don't talk to guys unless they talk to us first. (At least that's me) Just develop your own confidence and make friends. You'll find a girl eventually if you do so. Remember, if you want it badly--you only live once so why not just shed your awkwardness and adopt a new person in the city? Who cares if you embarrass yourself one time? No one's going to remember that after a few years (probably). Don't let your awkwardness hinder your life.

I just need to stop thinking about getting one. I enjoy being alone most of the time but I do see friends now and then when I can it’s just sometimes when people talk about having girlfriends sort makes a bit depressed. I know it will happen eventually and when it. Does it would be scary for me as I’ve never had a GF before that’s what I'm afraid off.

I will be out and a living in the city and i want try and be more confident around people and increase my social skills a lot better and also try and get rid off porn as well as that doesn’t make it any better for me. But yeah mostly I just need it speak more clearly and confidently as that’s where I lack mostly and work on myself and focus on where I want to go in life.
Reply 9
Original post by Anonymous
I live in a remote area in the countryside not a lot of of women you’d meet unless you are living in the city which I will be living this September. But I have pretty much given up meeting girls as I go everywhere I go when I go do different countries and nothing doesn’t happen so in terms hoping to find a girlfriend I have given up as just doesn’t happen for me.

Yeah, living in a remote location is never great to meeting people.

Advice along the lines of it will happen when you least expect it is correct but it assumes you actively place yourself in circumstances where you can meet members of the opposite sex.

So once you move to the city, get out there as much as you can and you’ll likely meet someone.

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