Should I Get Back Together with My Ex?

I could really use some advice on a situation I'm facing, and I'd appreciate your insights.

Background: I (male) dated a girl for three years, from ages 17 to 19. We recently decided to take a break because we felt like our differing views were causing tension in the relationship. During this break, we agreed that if either of us were to have sex with someone else, we probably wouldn't get back together.

The Dilemma: My ex-girlfriend recently told me that she had sex with someone else just three weeks into our break. I'm feeling a mix of anger and hurt, but she's expressed interest in potentially getting back together in the future.

We're planning to meet in two days to exchange belongings, and she's suggested the possibility of having sex one last time. Part of me feels like doing so would be disrespectful to myself, but another part worries about ending things with her feeling like the other guy was better.

What I Need Help With: Should I consider getting back together with my ex-girlfriend, considering her actions during the break? And should I have sex with her for the final time during our meeting?

I'd appreciate any thoughts or advice you could offer. Thank you in advance for your help.

Reply 1

ExponentBen

Original post by Anonymous

I could really use some advice on a situation I'm facing, and I'd appreciate your insights.
Background: I (male) dated a girl for three years, from ages 17 to 19. We recently decided to take a break because we felt like our differing views were causing tension in the relationship. During this break, we agreed that if either of us were to have sex with someone else, we probably wouldn't get back together.
The Dilemma: My ex-girlfriend recently told me that she had sex with someone else just three weeks into our break. I'm feeling a mix of anger and hurt, but she's expressed interest in potentially getting back together in the future.
We're planning to meet in two days to exchange belongings, and she's suggested the possibility of having sex one last time. Part of me feels like doing so would be disrespectful to myself, but another part worries about ending things with her feeling like the other guy was better.
What I Need Help With: Should I consider getting back together with my ex-girlfriend, considering her actions during the break? And should I have sex with her for the final time during our meeting?
I'd appreciate any thoughts or advice you could offer. Thank you in advance for your help.

Navigating relationships can be challenging, especially when faced with complex emotions and decisions like the one you're currently grappling with. Here are some considerations to help you make a decision:

1. Evaluate Your Feelings: Take some time to reflect on your emotions regarding your ex-girlfriend's actions during the break. Are you able to move past the hurt and anger, or do you think it will continue to affect your relationship if you were to get back together?

2. Trust and Communication: Trust is a foundational aspect of any relationship. Consider whether you can trust your ex-girlfriend moving forward, especially considering the breach of the agreement during the break. Open and honest communication will be essential in rebuilding trust if you decide to reconcile.

3. Self-Respect and Boundaries: Consider whether engaging in sex one last time aligns with your values and self-respect. While it may seem like closure, it's important to prioritize your emotional well-being and not engage in activities that may leave you feeling used or disrespected.

4. Future Compatibility: Reflect on whether your differing views and values are still significant barriers to a successful relationship. Are you both willing to compromise and work through these differences, or are they likely to cause ongoing tension?

5. Take Your Time: You don't have to rush into a decision. It's okay to take time to process your feelings and evaluate what's best for you. Consider discussing your concerns with trusted friends or family members who can offer support and perspective.

Ultimately, the decision to get back together with your ex-girlfriend and whether to engage in sex one last time is a personal one that only you can make. Trust your instincts and prioritize your emotional well-being above all else

Reply 2

Surnia

Life & Style Forum Helper

That's a break-up, not a break. Neither of you have addressed the reasons for the split, and you can't do that when you're apart as you can't talk through it. Plus she's slept with someone else.

Don't do anything than tell her it's over and move on.