I'm in love with my same sex best friend

This will be a long post, but bare with me. I am trying to work this out in my own head as much as I am asking for advice.

About a year ago, I started a new friendship that quickly began to feel like it was moving towards something more. We maintained constant communication and hung out outside of school nearly everyday. I have a long commute to campus and often stayed at her house -- even sleeping in her bed while there is a guest room available. Our conversations were deeply vulnerable discussions about our pasts, and we continue to be very supportive of each other -- no one knows each other like we know each other. She often gave me personal complements about my kindness, humor, and intelligence. During a discussion about past relationships and love, she told me she wants love because it makes her feel centered. A few days later, after telling me I was the kindness and most genuine person she knows, she added that she greatly admires how I make her feel centered.

We were very touchy and flirty: rubbing my leg under the table, holding hands, sitting in my lap, very long close hugs (she even nestled her face in my neck), some sexual talk, a lot of flirty smiles and teasing. We went out to dinner often after class and a few of those times felt like dates. There were a few instances when I was certain she wanted to kiss me, but I was nervous and scared that she was leading me on, and I couldn't kiss her.

Things died down after a few weeks, and my curiosity got the best of me. I shamefully and regretfully read her journal. She recognized the period we were both interested in each other and confirmed a few of the times she wanted to kiss me. Though it doesn't make it right, I will say that she had read my journal too and has multiple times since. We have never spoken openly about reading each other journals, but she knows that I know about her going through my personal things -- I wrote it in my journal after all.

About two months passed before I addressed the situation. At first she acted surprised and told me she is the same way with everyone. She is not and that initial conversation irritated me enough to have a second one with her a couple days later. She admitted to feeling a connection with me in the beginning but realized it was deep friendship, not romantic. She took accountability for leading me on, apologized, and the touchy-ness and flirty talk has stopped. We don't even hug anymore.

Fast forward a year and we are still very close friends. We often stay at each others houses (though I still sleep in her bed, she doesn't sleep in mine), and we are basically raising a dog together. She hasn't given me any real reason to think there is actually a chance for romance -- I believed her when she told me no. But, I know there has been times that she has wanted to kiss me again, and I think she sometimes buys into a fantasy that we are a couple. I have noticed that she gets uncomfortable now when I mention ex-girlfriends or when other girls hug me. I'm having a hard time understanding this. Is this a possessiveness thing?

We had another conversation about things recently to address the feeling I have that she is going to bail on me. She assured me that I was her best friend. However, she has lied to me on at least two occasions about going on dates, and I have a feeling that she will bail on me once she gets serious with one of the guys she is dating.

Within the last couple months I've realized that I am in love with her despite the fact that I know it will never happen. I reassured her that even though I can't help but be affected by things sometimes, I will never make my feelings her problem. I also told her that I haven't been harboring any sense of hope.

Do I just ride it out and hope my feelings go away once I (painfully) see her with someone else? (If I see her with someone else, I should specify). Has anyone else had a similar experience?