Struggling to make friends at uni

First year at UOM and im struggling to make friends, I hate going out and clubbing which is one of the main ways people make friends, really struggling out here in Manny need help!!

Reply 1

DataVenia

Volunteer Team, Clearing and Applications Advisor

Original post by Anonymous

First year at UOM and im struggling to make friends, I hate going out and clubbing which is one of the main ways people make friends, really struggling out here in Manny need help!!

A great way to meet new people is via the various clubs and societies. It's sometimes worth joining even if your not particularly interested, just to mix with a new group of people.

Alternatively, see if the uni has any opportunities to work or volunteer in the library, or café, or as a student ambassador etc. - as that will get you mixing with a new group of people too.

You will find that there are actually a lot of people like you, who don't like going out clubbing all the time. The tricky thing is finding them because, well, they don't go out. :smile:

Reply 2

University of Bradford

Official Rep

Original post by Anonymous

First year at UOM and im struggling to make friends, I hate going out and clubbing which is one of the main ways people make friends, really struggling out here in Manny need help!!

Hey, how are you? :smile:

I also didn't enjoy going out and clubbing when I was a student, and found making friends extremely hard, so you're not the only one, there'll be so many other students who prefer to grab a coffee with friends, arrange to go to a nice restaurant, go for a countryside walk etc. It's just trying to find these people with similar interests to you. Could you join a club or society so you're around like minded people? You could also check out your student union events, are they organising any day trips, walks, fun events that you can get involved in?

I'd also agree with the advice below on seeing if there's any volunteering opportunities, part-time work on campus or become a student ambassador as ways of meeting new people!

Do you have any of your course mates on social media? Starting small like replying to one of their Stories could be a good way to start a conversation. Or if you can give them a compliment, or ask them about their work in a lecture? You could suggest forming a study group together then grabbing a coffee afterwards.

Good luck with the rest of your university journey, I hope you meet some wonderful people soon!

Becky

Reply 3

Chester Student

Official Rep

Original post by Anonymous

First year at UOM and im struggling to make friends, I hate going out and clubbing which is one of the main ways people make friends, really struggling out here in Manny need help!!

Hi there,

I'm sorry to hear you are struggling with this! It can be difficult when it seems like everyone enjoys different things to you, but there are loads of other ways to make friends.

For example, you can talk to the people in your classes; join sports and/or societies; find part-time work; volunteer; join activities in your city (that don't involve clubbing); and join activities on your campus. Once you start chatting with people, suggesting coffee/study dates and/or walks around the city/shopping would be a good way to get to know them better.

Creating bonds takes time, so be patient! It can be difficult, but is definitely worth it to find your people. There are plenty of people who don't go clubbing (me included!), so I hope you find them soon.

Best of luck,

Isabella
Third-year Geography with a Year Abroad Student

Reply 4

hallamstudents

Official Rep

Original post by Anonymous

First year at UOM and im struggling to make friends, I hate going out and clubbing which is one of the main ways people make friends, really struggling out here in Manny need help!!

Hi there,

Sorry to hear you have been feeling like this, it can be tough when you feel lonely at uni.

My best recommendation for making friends at uni would be joining a society. Societies can be great ways of making friends as you know you have a shared interest so the likelihood is they will be fairly similar to you in some ways. Most people who join societies want to make friends too so I would definitely suggest doing this. If you don't want to join now, I would go to the freshers fair when you start second year and have a look at what's on offer to see if any suit you! Societies also often put on socials and some of these will be non drinking so you may enjoy going to these!
You can also go to societies which are non drinking in general so I would have a look into these as this sounds like it would suit you!

I also found that with the people I met on my course, we would quite often do things which weren't drinking anyway. Ask if anyone wants to go for a coffee after uni, or go and study together in the library and people may be up for doing this with you.

Also, getting a job is a great way of making friends. Have a look to see if you uni has any campus jobs available as it is usually students who have these jobs so it is a great way of meeting other students while earning some money! They are usually flexible jobs too which is great.

Also, have a look to see if your student union puts any events on. At Hallam, the SU puts on 'give it a go' events which are usually non drinking events such as going to a theme park, the cinema or an ice hockey game! These are great ways of meeting people while not going out drinking so it would be worth having a look at these.

I hope some of this helps,

Lucy -SHU student ambassador.

Reply 5

Anonymous #2

Original post by Anonymous

First year at UOM and im struggling to make friends, I hate going out and clubbing which is one of the main ways people make friends, really struggling out here in Manny need help!!

Hey im at UOM too and i also don’t like clubbing and I was lonely for the first weeks but i ended up making friends in my course, maybe join societies (ik thats a basic answer, even i haven’t joined societies yet) but like if your ethnicity or a cultural society would be a good place to start?

Reply 6

Anonymous #3

Original post by Anonymous

First year at UOM and im struggling to make friends, I hate going out and clubbing which is one of the main ways people make friends, really struggling out here in Manny need help!!

I am in the same boat!! Ur not alone I’m considering dropping out because of it honestly - uni life is really overhyped for what it is and especially in a city like manny ;-;

Reply 7

Anonymous #1

Original post by Anonymous

Ive been to my ethnic groups society, they seem kinda stuck up so id rather not I've been to other societies but not really consistently as I'm currently involved heavily in one of the societies I attend, however not really concretely friend with anyone still despite nearly being in uni for 21 whole weeks

Reply 8

Anonymous #1

Original post by Anonymous

I am in the same boat!! Ur not alone I’m considering dropping out because of it honestly - uni life is really overhyped for what it is and especially in a city like manny ;-;