The Student Room Group

Bath Spa or Durham for Psychology

Hello, my son has had all his offers in and is choosing between Durham and Bath Spa. He never thought he’d get Durham offered and it was an aspirational choice. I really think from all I’ve looked at and knowing my son he’ll thrive at Durham, academically and socially (he’s shy at first but loves socialising once he feels confident). And I feel this is such an opportunity you have to give it a shot. He is siding with Bath Spa because his gf (of 7 months) is going there and he’s worried about going off to university on his own and worries they will split up. He also feels Durham is too elitist and he won’t fit in. Please help, should I still encourage Durham or just let him follow his gf?
Original post by Anonymous
Hello, my son has had all his offers in and is choosing between Durham and Bath Spa. He never thought he’d get Durham offered and it was an aspirational choice. I really think from all I’ve looked at and knowing my son he’ll thrive at Durham, academically and socially (he’s shy at first but loves socialising once he feels confident). And I feel this is such an opportunity you have to give it a shot. He is siding with Bath Spa because his gf (of 7 months) is going there and he’s worried about going off to university on his own and worries they will split up. He also feels Durham is too elitist and he won’t fit in. Please help, should I still encourage Durham or just let him follow his gf?

Hiya,

Congratulations to your son on his offer! Has your son attended an open day? If not, then perhaps it may be a good idea to come visit Durham, see what its like and ask the students about their experience. Since he did get an offer, he does have the chance to come and visit Durham on Post Offer Day on April 27th 🙂
Post Offer Visit Day

As someone who was incredibly shy and not that confident academically, Durham gave me the opportunity to grow and thrive in a way I never thought was possible and I have met many people who feel the same way. The opportunities here at Durham and the collegiate system truly did create an amazing environment and experience for me, that being said, that isn't always the experience or case for everyone so it depends on every student and what they're wanting out of University. Durham unfortunately does have a certain reputation but its definitely a bit more exaggerated and there's a place for everyone here, and so many communities/societies and people from all background represented, so he will find his people! I initially had doubts about Durham but when I attended the post offer visit day, I felt much better about coming to Durham after seeing it for myself and speaking to students, so I would definitely recommend attending if you can 🙂

If you're unable to attend, that's completely fine, there are a lot of online resources that can provide a bit of insight into what life is like at Durham University:

1.

The Durham Student- Where you can find all student social media content, blogs, Youtube videos, etc on Durham University and life here. I would highly recommend having a look through as there is some amazing content and blogs that are incredibly informative.
The Durham Student

2.

UniBuddy- A platform for prospective or incoming students to speak directly to Durham students and ask questions about courses and learning, colleges, societies and more or less anything.
UniBuddy

3.

Durham Student Union- You can have a look through some of the student societies and groups at Durham and see what interests you 🙂
Societies at Durham


I hope this helps and if you have any other questions, I'm more than happy to help!

-Ghala
I went to Bath Spa in 2014 and did English and Creative Writing. Personally i would encourage him to go to Durham. Durham will provide him with exposure to job opportunities and a social network he can draw on in decades to come. Ofcourse, he can build aperfectly good life going to Bath Spa, but it is not the norm there to get exceptionally prestigious job offers after university there.That is my experience. Wherever he goes he should work very hard and have a good attitude. Durham could change the trajectoryof his life should he choose there. Good luck to him.
Original post by Anonymous
I went to Bath Spa in 2014 and did English and Creative Writing. Personally i would encourage him to go to Durham. Durham will provide him with exposure to job opportunities and a social network he can draw on in decades to come. Ofcourse, he can build aperfectly good life going to Bath Spa, but it is not the norm there to get exceptionally prestigious job offers after university there.That is my experience. Wherever he goes he should work very hard and have a good attitude. Durham could change the trajectoryof his life should he choose there. Good luck to him.

I forgot to add, re. elitism in Durham. Bath is also quite an elitist place. Bath Spa is very much the 'poor relation' of the University ofBath. Everyone at Bath Spa has an anecdote about this... Bath is also a very expensive city although it is beautiful and clean.Facilities at Durham are likely to be better than Bath Spa as well.
Hi, I posted the previous comments and your sons case has really resonated with me so i have come off anonymous. Please message me if you have any questions about Bath Spa. I am even happy to speak to you/your son. I am now 29 and wish someone had spoken some words of wisdom to me at 18. The choice of which university to go to has such important implications for the rest of his life, making an informed choice unclouded by emotion is crucial.
Original post by Anonymous
Hello, my son has had all his offers in and is choosing between Durham and Bath Spa. He never thought he’d get Durham offered and it was an aspirational choice. I really think from all I’ve looked at and knowing my son he’ll thrive at Durham, academically and socially (he’s shy at first but loves socialising once he feels confident). And I feel this is such an opportunity you have to give it a shot. He is siding with Bath Spa because his gf (of 7 months) is going there and he’s worried about going off to university on his own and worries they will split up. He also feels Durham is too elitist and he won’t fit in. Please help, should I still encourage Durham or just let him follow his gf?

Please try encourage him to go Durham. You should never follow a partner for things like this. My brother and his girlfriend went to different universities and now have been together 8 years. They met during second year of college. It’s possible to make it work, but I understand he probably feels that she is a security blanket.

The thing about going to university with a partner is that you will automatically spend more time with them, meaning you will meet less people during freshers and in general as people are less willing to socialise with groups of people who already know each other at university, this is because it makes them feel like an outsider who can’t connect on their levels of banta etc. It will cause more social issues than it is worth.

It is such a great opportunity he should not be throwing this away for the sake of his girlfriend. If they truly love each other it will still work out.

Durham will open up so many doors. I know this was posted two months ago but I truly hope he has come to his senses.

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