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question

i'm 18 and have never been to a party before (never been invited)
how can i change this when i'm at uni i don't want to be alone like i am nnow i'm really introverted and meeting new people/going out really doesn't appeal to me

Reply 1

DataVenia

Volunteer Team, Clearing and Applications Advisor

Original post by Anonymous

Would a party not count as "going out", something which "really doesn't appeal" to you? If so, then why do you want to go to one?

Reply 2

YSJstudents

Official Rep

Original post by Anonymous

Hi,

There’s quite a lot of people who don’t go out drinking at uni. Please don’t feel like you need to pressure yourself into going out if you don’t want to. As there’s some many ways to meet new people, without having to go out drinking and going to party’s.

I would recommend you join a society. Society’s are great way to meet new people, with similar interests as you. There’s socities for pretty much everything such as board games, esports, hiking, food based ones, fashion, music. You can find a list of the society’s that your uni has to offer on the Student Union website. In September you’ll be able to go to the freshers fair and sign up for some taster sessions so you can see if you would like the society’, before joining it.

Part time jobs, such as being a student ambassador, is also a great way to meet new people! As well as becoming more comfortable and confident whilst being at uni!

Yes, a lot of students do go out and drink, especially on Wednesdays, but there’s equally a lot of students who prefer not to go out and stay sober.

I hope this helps!

Suzan - Student Ambassador

Reply 3

Id2456

If you haven't been to a party before it could be true that it's not your thing, but you can't truly know that until you go to one. Luckily for you, invites to first year parties don't really exist and everyone in your halls will be invited. My advice would be to go for it, put yourself out of your comfort zone and let loose a little bit. Get to know your flatmates first, so that you can hang off of them a little bit within larger social groups if you feel you need to (no one minds that) and be honest with them about your introverted tendencies. In my experience, being vulnerable with people about having trouble socially makes them try to include you more in things because everyone wants to see you without your social inhibitions. For context, I moved home after the christmas holidays in first and second year because I thought that I was too introverted for uni but realised during my placement year that I just needed to push myself. During my placement year I managed to make a few friends and one friend that is now possibly the closest person to me (we're going to Japan together next year). TLDR: as absurd as it might sound, everyone wants to be friends with YOU as everyone wants friends, you just have to be honest with people and they'll make sure you're well looked after :smile: