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growing affections for a friend

This one friend ive know for a few years broke up.

Im starting to have feelings growing for her.

How'd i go about asking her about this?

Ill be seeing her irl soon.

any advice would be appreciated
first thing i want to ask: how long exactly have you had these feelings for her? you need to bear in mind that she's just gone through a break up- so if you were to confess your feelings for her now, it's highly likely it's a bad time and she'll say no, or dismiss it.

i would say don't do anything yet. you said that you're beginning to have growing feelings for her right- so these feelings may not be as deep as you think they are. bringing it up now isn't a good idea because of her breakup, but also you may find that you might not actually want to pursue her in a romantic way say, 2/3 months from now. not all romantic feelings need to be addressed as soon as they appear, because that may make things a bit complicated in your friendship, and i'm assuming you don't want that 😭.

did you like her whilst she was in a relationship too, or is it just now that you're starting to like her? because if this is a spontaneous growing crush, then it may not need addressing. i hope that helped, sorry if i misunderstood anything : )
Reply 2
Original post by Anonymous
first thing i want to ask: how long exactly have you had these feelings for her? you need to bear in mind that she's just gone through a break up- so if you were to confess your feelings for her now, it's highly likely it's a bad time and she'll say no, or dismiss it.
i would say don't do anything yet. you said that you're beginning to have growing feelings for her right- so these feelings may not be as deep as you think they are. bringing it up now isn't a good idea because of her breakup, but also you may find that you might not actually want to pursue her in a romantic way say, 2/3 months from now. not all romantic feelings need to be addressed as soon as they appear, because that may make things a bit complicated in your friendship, and i'm assuming you don't want that 😭.
did you like her whilst she was in a relationship too, or is it just now that you're starting to like her? because if this is a spontaneous growing crush, then it may not need addressing. i hope that helped, sorry if i misunderstood anything : )

I've started having these feelings about a week ago.

Its hard to say, cos from what the vibes and the texts we've been having she's willing to sleep with her mates. Ngl im also stuck between a relationship or maybe fwb.

I did like her when we first started as friends but then that feeling kinda disappeared.

We are gonna meet up in about 4 to 5 months from now so i hope that's a while to process these things. Any advice would be great help and thank you for your advice.
Original post by Anonymous
I've started having these feelings about a week ago.
Its hard to say, cos from what the vibes and the texts we've been having she's willing to sleep with her mates. Ngl im also stuck between a relationship or maybe fwb.
I did like her when we first started as friends but then that feeling kinda disappeared.
We are gonna meet up in about 4 to 5 months from now so i hope that's a while to process these things. Any advice would be great help and thank you for your advice.

definitely use that 4-5 months to process your feelings. you don't know whether when you see her the feelings with flare up or die down, so it's best to just sit with them right now and see if they go away or grow over time. you said it's just been a week, so maybe its a case of you just finding her more attractive rather than actually liking her in a "more than friends" way.

with the fwb thing, as long as it's something u both are ok with and it doesn't affect your friendship then i don't really see why not. i've never had a fwb so i dont really know how they go from a personal experience, but if that is something that you both think would be fine then go for it. but i think you'd need to wait out your feelings first- to see if they are really genuine or just fleeting. because that will definitely sway you in a direction that will either make you want to pursue a relationship or not. i hope that helped ; )

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