The Student Room Group

ex boyfriend advice

So im going to try and summarise this as best as possible. me and my now ex bf were in the most healthiest, happiest relationship you could think of. We met when we were 20 in the 2nd year of uni and were completely inseperable for a year.
He broke up with me in January and it came as a complete shock. To eb honest we had a rough couple weeks - we both do stressful uni degrees, he like to smoke a lot and Im not into that whatsoever and I think by the end if the year I though it was more burnout but I guess he felt it was kind of burnout of our realtionship.

we had like a month of not seeing each other as my family took a trip away and were reunited in February. we still talked pretty much everyday and called once a week to check in. When we saw eachother it was lovely, like old times. he said he wanted to see each other once a week as we still get on really well. Fast forward to the next week, we wen too the pub, drinks were flowing and we ended up back at each others houses. We kind of spoke about it as like its happened lets move on, but lets just say it just kept happening every time we saw each other.
It was a confusing time for me as I was healing but at the same time wanted to see where this may possibly go, as I possible thought a little break over feb is what we needed idk. Before the easter break he came to me saying he still had feelings and sleeping together was no linger a good idea, in which I respected and again another month break ( I went home from uni for a month lol).

ANYWAY, fast forward to April and the first time we met up ... we ended sleeping together. I stated that if we continue to do this I dont want to be sleeping with anyone else as it's disrespectful to which he agreed. So I guess im in a sort of friends with bens situation with my ex. When we sleep together tho its so much more like we go to the pub, go for food, spend the night its not just like friends with bens situations ibve had before where its lit just sex then leave.

It s confusing tho. Him saying there were still feelings there only a couple weeks ago and to be honest, with some work done I would get back with him in a heartbeat. But I dont know whether to bring this up or not.

its just very confusing. we leave for summer in a month and see each other around once a week, I dont know if I should try dn bring it up with him cause that could potentially ruin things or make things,

I just in need for some advice

Reply 1

First of all the fact ur feeling confused about where exactly this relationship lies and where it is headed isnt exactly a brilliant sign. And thats ok, I think youve already given it another shot with him so maybe its now just best to leave it? I dont want to be giving dodgy advice here but I think that now as you've been in a fairly longish term relationship with him there could be a possibility that you're both just keeping contact because its familiar and somewhat comforting and everything is just easier this way, which yeah as much as its enjoyable to keep things going but just be careful that this isnt turning into a tricky on and off whenever-its-convenient-for-him kind of thing. You are not disposable, its best to be upfront and tell him that you do want a relationship with him again because otherwise you're just leading urself on really. Best of luck girl and always prioritize your values and if he wanted to he would (without being too harsh) x

Reply 2

Original post by bigbadballs1233
First of all the fact ur feeling confused about where exactly this relationship lies and where it is headed isnt exactly a brilliant sign. And thats ok, I think youve already given it another shot with him so maybe its now just best to leave it? I dont want to be giving dodgy advice here but I think that now as you've been in a fairly longish term relationship with him there could be a possibility that you're both just keeping contact because its familiar and somewhat comforting and everything is just easier this way, which yeah as much as its enjoyable to keep things going but just be careful that this isnt turning into a tricky on and off whenever-its-convenient-for-him kind of thing. You are not disposable, its best to be upfront and tell him that you do want a relationship with him again because otherwise you're just leading urself on really. Best of luck girl and always prioritize your values and if he wanted to he would (without being too harsh) x

thank you so much honey x

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