Meeting up? Intrested after 2 years? Has to ask? Normal

If you have to ask the question you know the answer!! Move on and get rid
This man is a selfish waste of space and you have already lost 2 years of your life. Life is too short to be a professional doormat. It should be fun, full of laughter and sharing. Get out there and find a man who will treat you like you deserve to be treated. Like a million dollars. You should both be falling over each other and breaking down doors to meet up and share life in the short time you can spare (By sounds of it even the weekends with this man is 2 days too much. This is you being used as a 'convenience' and - YES you are being 'used'

Can I ask how I’m a doormat.
He has said to me multiple times I can come to his house whenever I want to I don’t need to ask him

That's the thing if you don't realise it - You are doing all the work to 'serve' him in this relationship.
When do you ever say - 'you can come across anytime to me anytime' (and he does?)
When is he 'enthusiastic' about making the effort to come and see you?
When does he lift a finger to make the effort just for you?
If a 'no' - you are a convenience at his choosing
At the moment he sits in his 'castle' and expects everyone to come running so he doesn't have to lift a finger. You are the one making excuses on his behalf. That is why I use the term 'doormat'

Actually he drives 2 hours every weekend to pick me up a drop me back on Sunday. I’m definitely not a doormat darling plus he gives me money when I want it

Actually he drives 2 hours every weekend to pick me up a drop me back on Sunday. I’m definitely not a doormat darling plus he gives me money when I want it

I don't think you're a doormat and I think this person may be being a little harsh towards your boyfriend. However, from personal experience, sometimes in a long-term relationship you can get complacent with your partner's behaviour, and it takes a reality check to realise that things need to change.
The solution to most problems like this is just to communicate. Tell him that never instigating a meet-up makes you feel that he's not really interested in you (however, I agree with Muttly that if you're in a relationship with someone it should be clear that they are interested in you anyway.)
His response that you can just 'come over whenever' is a bit confusing considering that he always picks you up. I assume that you don't really have other forms of transport available to go over to his house? In that case, yes you do need to plan beforehand whether he is going to pick you up or not, and his lack of communication on this issue is very frustrating.
Does he ever take you out on dates or do you ever meet up outside the house? If you don't, that is a sure fire way to let the relationship get boring and stale pretty quickly. He should be suggesting other things that you can do together, not just expecting you to come over the whole time.
So overall, I don't think his behaviour is normal. It sounds like he is becoming a bit complacent and not putting much effort into your relationship. But at the same time, he can't read minds so you should be communicating about how you feel. The only way he'll know he needs to change is if you talk to him.

I’ve been with my bf for 2 years and we meet on the weekends but I feel like I’m the one who has to message and say ‘are you going to pick me up today’ or what time are you going to pick me up. He never ever plans anything ( maybe he just assumes we r meeting) he said before we’ve been together long I don’t need to ask him to meet and I can just come to his house whenever I want.
Is this normal? Surely people plan things. I mean he actually refuses at this point because he never does. I feel like if I don’t message we won’t meet up he’ll just talk to me as per normal.
Is this man actually bloody interested in me?! Or am I overthinking