Educational neglect, any advice?

In Year 4, when I was 9, my parents started home educating me, however they never actually did any of it. My local authority failed their duty to ensure I was being educated and left me to be neglected by my parents. Now I'm 17, and completely uneducated since leaving primary school. I am lacking in any qualifications due to never having attended secondary school before, and I don't understand any of the material to be able to achieve any.

I have spoken to the Department of Education, my local college and my local authority to explain my situation, and ask for guidance. The consensus seems to be that my only option is to take a Level 1 course in a FE college (I had to google what this meant at first, due to not understanding any schooling terminology). None of the courses they offered interested me at all. I can't unlock any better courses to take because it's apparently impossible for me to go to college to acquire GCSEs as my local college doesn't do them or something. No training centre near me does them either.

So as for my question, is there anything else I can do, or should I just take a course that I don't care about, and work towards getting a crappy job in brick layering or carpentry? Are all colleges supposed to offer GCSEs courses? If so, then why didn't my college offer them? My life is pretty much ruined unless I can enter education again but I'm not sure it's a good idea to take a course that I have no interest in either. There seems to be no system in place for recovering from educational neglect in the UK, so my local authority are giving me the same options as someone who's failed their GCSEs, despite the fact I've never even had the chance to attempt them before.

Any advice would be appreciated, thank you.

If your local college don't offer GCSEs, the you may have to look at other colleges, slightly less local.
The government have a tool here to search for colleges. Just enter your town or postcode and the keyword "GCSE" and it'll list nearby colleges offering GCSEs. You can also search by subject if you prefer, but then you'll likely get shown a lot of A level courses rather than GCSE courses.
If travelling to a different college isn't feasible, then you might consider a distance learning provider (effectively an on-line college).

There's nothing "slightly" less local. The closest college to me that does GCSE courses is 75 miles away.

I failed to mention in my original post that I have also been socially isolated for the entire duration of me being "homeschooled". I think it would be best for me to attend a place of education in person as oppose to online learning because of that. Just don't think there's any way of me doing that without taking a course that I don't want to do.
Thank you for the advice, anyway.

Wow. 75 miles?!
OK. You say that you've been told that your "only option is to take a Level 1 course in a FE college". What is the name of this course? (By the way, a GCSE at grades 1 through 3 would be a Level 1 qualification.)
You also mention that you "can't unlock any better courses". Will the Level 1 course unlock those courses? And, if so, what courses will it unlock?

My local college offers Level 1 courses in various different trade jobs like brick layering or carpentry for example. I would much prefer to not do these, but my college doesn't have GCSE courses. A training centre near me does do GCSEs but since they count as resits, GCSEs at grade 1 or above are a prerequisite for starting (which obviously I don't have).

I don't know how all this works due to never having attended school, but I assume completing a Level 1 course would unlock Level 2 courses, correct? I don't know what Level 2 courses it would unlock specifically. I guess it just depends on what courses they have at that particular college. They didn't mention that in their email even after I asked.

My issue is that I don't want to waste my time studying a trade I don't care about for the sole reason of unlocking Level 2 courses. Travelling halfway across the country to attend a college isn't really an option for me and I don't think staying completely isolated and studying from home is a good idea either.

In Year 4, when I was 9, my parents started home educating me, however they never actually did any of it. My local authority failed their duty to ensure I was being educated and left me to be neglected by my parents. Now I'm 17, and completely uneducated since leaving primary school. I am lacking in any qualifications due to never having attended secondary school before, and I don't understand any of the material to be able to achieve any.
I have spoken to the Department of Education, my local college and my local authority to explain my situation, and ask for guidance. The consensus seems to be that my only option is to take a Level 1 course in a FE college (I had to google what this meant at first, due to not understanding any schooling terminology). None of the courses they offered interested me at all. I can't unlock any better courses to take because it's apparently impossible for me to go to college to acquire GCSEs as my local college doesn't do them or something. No training centre near me does them either.
So as for my question, is there anything else I can do, or should I just take a course that I don't care about, and work towards getting a crappy job in brick layering or carpentry? Are all colleges supposed to offer GCSEs courses? If so, then why didn't my college offer them? My life is pretty much ruined unless I can enter education again but I'm not sure it's a good idea to take a course that I have no interest in either. There seems to be no system in place for recovering from educational neglect in the UK, so my local authority are giving me the same options as someone who's failed their GCSEs, despite the fact I've never even had the chance to attempt them before.
Any advice would be appreciated, thank you.