Never made friends at uni and I'm going into 3rd year

I'm just finishing my second year of university and in all that time I haven't made a group of friends. I allways feel so alone here.

I joined clubs and societies, even became president of one but yet I still don't have any friends here. Nobody messages, I have no-one to chat to on my course, I have no group of friends here.

I've tried so many times to be chatty and outgoing. I even ended up going out every night for a while to try and make friends.

I've got to a point where I'm not sure what else there is to do. I feel like I tried everything and just still alone

Reply 1

Anonymous #2

hey if you’d like to talk on socials i’m here!

i’m starting uni this year i won’t know anyone, i’m f 20 yo

Reply 2

Billycatnorbert

Original post by Anonymous

I'm just finishing my second year of university and in all that time I haven't made a group of friends. I allways feel so alone here.
I joined clubs and societies, even became president of one but yet I still don't have any friends here. Nobody messages, I have no-one to chat to on my course, I have no group of friends here.
I've tried so many times to be chatty and outgoing. I even ended up going out every night for a while to try and make friends.
I've got to a point where I'm not sure what else there is to do. I feel like I tried everything and just still alone

Made a similar post a few weeks ago. Idk how to make it better but if u want someone to talk to I’ll message you whenever :smile:

Reply 3

Billycatnorbert

Original post by Anonymous

hey if you’d like to talk on socials i’m here!
i’m starting uni this year i won’t know anyone, i’m f 20 yo

I’m in a similar position to OP, if u want and totally get it if not, u can message me if u want

Reply 4

hobba

It was the exact opposite for me. I am not a person who likes a lot of friends, but boy, did everyone want to be my friend at uni. I was a straight honours student, and they all wanted help. I would help, but when they found out it required them to, horror of horrors, work, they were not so chummy. I did become good friends with two other honours students, and we had fantastic discussions. Maybe just concentrate on doing well and others may gravitate to you.

Reply 5

De Montfort University

Official Rep

Original post by Anonymous

I'm just finishing my second year of university and in all that time I haven't made a group of friends. I allways feel so alone here.
I joined clubs and societies, even became president of one but yet I still don't have any friends here. Nobody messages, I have no-one to chat to on my course, I have no group of friends here.
I've tried so many times to be chatty and outgoing. I even ended up going out every night for a while to try and make friends.
I've got to a point where I'm not sure what else there is to do. I feel like I tried everything and just still alone

Hi there,

I'm really sorry to hear that you're feeling this way, but please know that you're not alone. Many of us struggle with making connections in university. It's great to hear that you've been proactive in joining clubs and societies, as these are usually great places to meet like-minded people. Sometimes, friendships take time to develop, and that's completely okay. It's important to remember that it's the quality of friendships that truly matters, not the quantity. Stay true to yourself, keep engaging in activities that you love, and in time, you may find people who truly appreciate you for who you are. Don't be too hard on yourself, these things take time.

Let me know if you have any questions,
Ilya :smile:

Reply 6

University of Huddersfield

Official Rep

Original post by Anonymous

I'm just finishing my second year of university and in all that time I haven't made a group of friends. I allways feel so alone here.
I joined clubs and societies, even became president of one but yet I still don't have any friends here. Nobody messages, I have no-one to chat to on my course, I have no group of friends here.
I've tried so many times to be chatty and outgoing. I even ended up going out every night for a while to try and make friends.
I've got to a point where I'm not sure what else there is to do. I feel like I tried everything and just still alone

Anon,

It's possible that things might turn around in third year, but if not, it might be about focusing on friendships outside of university. This might look like a community/volunteering group, a workplace, if you are religious ( a place of worship), friends from back home or even friends you might make this summer : )

Friendships aren’t predictable. You don’t always know who will become your good friends. You may initially think that you will get on with people from your course or accommodation, but you might end up making friends with the person you randomly get talking to at the library! Friendships can also change. People may feel close with some people one year and closer with others the following year, so you never know what might happen next year, as your year group spend more time stressing, revising and encouraging one another!

Whatever does happen, remember third year is a year when you need to focus on your studies and future plans.(Who knows if your next step post uni will be where you make great friends???)

Try not to stress about it all.

All the best,

Oluwatosin – 3rd year student – University of Huddersfield

Reply 7

Anonymous #3

I feel the same except I'm graduating soon. I made like 3 friends but we're all quite distant to each other and they've all got their own close friends. So it feels like I've got no one. It's weird because the loneliness is only hitting me hard now. I used to find going on walks alone and studying alone enjoyable, but now it feels so lonely. I'm honestly scared for the future because I'm worried I will struggle making friends when I start working full-time as lots of people will have their own families and own lives to deal with.

Reply 8

Chester Student

Official Rep

Original post by Anonymous

I'm just finishing my second year of university and in all that time I haven't made a group of friends. I allways feel so alone here.
I joined clubs and societies, even became president of one but yet I still don't have any friends here. Nobody messages, I have no-one to chat to on my course, I have no group of friends here.
I've tried so many times to be chatty and outgoing. I even ended up going out every night for a while to try and make friends.
I've got to a point where I'm not sure what else there is to do. I feel like I tried everything and just still alone

Hi there,

I'm really sorry to hear that you are struggling to make friends. It can be really difficult to do this, especially if you feel like you've tried everything. Sometimes the friendships we want and imagine to happen at university don't quite work out, and that is okay. Just know that you're not alone in feeling this way.

It is great that you are trying. It is incredibly important in university that you find what you enjoy, such as joining clubs and societies and going on nights out. All of these things you get involved in will be great for your wellbeing and look fantastic on your transcript!

If you're having no luck with anyone on campus, I'd recommend trying to make connections in your local area. Personally, I love volunteering. I've met so many great people through volunteering opportunities on campus, but I made even better connections with organizations outside of my university. Part time work, external clubs and groups, and becoming a local somewhere (e.g., a cafe) are all great ways to meet new people.

It can be difficult, so please don't be disheartened. It sounds like you've done a great job of being an active member of your university, have built up some great skills, and have tried really hard.

I hope this helps and best of luck,

Isabella
Third-year Geography with a Year Abroad Student

Reply 9

Chronoscope

Volunteer Section Leader

Original post by anonymous

I'm just finishing my second year of university and in all that time I haven't made a group of friends. I allways feel so alone here.
I joined clubs and societies, even became president of one but yet I still don't have any friends here. Nobody messages, I have no-one to chat to on my course, I have no group of friends here.
I've tried so many times to be chatty and outgoing. I even ended up going out every night for a while to try and make friends.
I've got to a point where I'm not sure what else there is to do. I feel like I tried everything and just still alone

I don't think it's too late :nah:

Lots of people on my course (basically everyone except a few people including me) had gone on placement, and the people who'd finished placement had come back. We gelled much better with them compared to the rest of our year group and it was much easier to make friends.
You could try new societies as well perhaps :smile:

(edited 1 year ago)

Reply 10

UCLan Student

Official Rep

Original post by Anonymous

I'm just finishing my second year of university and in all that time I haven't made a group of friends. I allways feel so alone here.
I joined clubs and societies, even became president of one but yet I still don't have any friends here. Nobody messages, I have no-one to chat to on my course, I have no group of friends here.
I've tried so many times to be chatty and outgoing. I even ended up going out every night for a while to try and make friends.
I've got to a point where I'm not sure what else there is to do. I feel like I tried everything and just still alone

Hey!

I'm really sorry to hear that you're having a tough time at the moment, it really seems like you've tried lots of different ways as well to meet new people.

From personal experience, a lot of the friends that I have now I've actually met through part time jobs that I have, you definitely meet friends in different places to what you would expect! Try to keep an open mind and you never know what is around the corner!

-Rebecca, UCLan

Reply 11

AnVeryBigIdiot

Original post by UCLan Student

Hey!
I'm really sorry to hear that you're having a tough time at the moment, it really seems like you've tried lots of different ways as well to meet new people.
From personal experience, a lot of the friends that I have now I've actually met through part time jobs that I have, you definitely meet friends in different places to what you would expect! Try to keep an open mind and you never know what is around the corner!
-Rebecca, UCLan

Do you know anyone that's like pretty geeky and likes games and pretty nerdy stuff in UCLan or Preston university or whatever, my brother goes there and is in his first year and I'm pretty sure he hasn't made any friends, he just plays stupid games like league of legends all day and doesn't meet anyone but I can tell from when he comes home every now and then hes getting more depressing. Do you know anyone thats like that, that would be friends with him because at the moment he's a total loner I'm pretty sure.
Sorry that this is unrelated to the original post aswell

Reply 12

UCLan Student

Official Rep

Original post by AnVeryBigIdiot

Hey there!

I would definitely encourage him to have a look at the societies we have, there really is one for everyone (including a video game society!). This is a great way for him to meet some people who have similar interests to him!

I hope this helps,
-Rebecca, UCLan

Reply 13

hallamstudents

Official Rep

Original post by Anonymous

I'm just finishing my second year of university and in all that time I haven't made a group of friends. I allways feel so alone here.
I joined clubs and societies, even became president of one but yet I still don't have any friends here. Nobody messages, I have no-one to chat to on my course, I have no group of friends here.
I've tried so many times to be chatty and outgoing. I even ended up going out every night for a while to try and make friends.
I've got to a point where I'm not sure what else there is to do. I feel like I tried everything and just still alone

Hi there,

I know you said you have tried societies and you didn't find friends this way, but I would encourage you to try and stick with one and see if you start to like it. Or, have a look if there is a different society you are interested in and start this when you start your final year! I know its of people who have done this and made friends this way so it is worth sticking it out and trying.

Or, you could have a look on social media and see if you can meet anyone who lives in your area and wants to make friends. I see people doing this quite often and you may meet some similar minded people this way!

You could also try joining a club that isn't associated with the uni and see if you meet people this way. It depends where you are living but clubs like 'these girls run' or other similar things get a group of people doing an activity together and people seem to make really good friends there.

I hope this helps,

Lucy -SHU student ambassador.