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Boyfriend & Drugs

Me and my boyfriend are long distance for context I F20 and him M19 I live in the Uk and he lives abroad where weed is legal but i don't know about others

He started being best friends with a girl from college who is 23 and their other friend is 17 the 23 year old lets call her P, was a recovered addict I think alcohol? Anyways last year she relapsed this time falling onto drugs instead in the past couple of months she invited my boyfriend to join in and knowing his addictive personality he didn't decline...

They've been hooked on a drug im assuming its coke but im not too familiar (a white powder thats snorted) they skip class to do it in the bathrooms, i really worry about his health I never thought his friend was a good person or influence but i didnt want to tell him i didnt approve of his friends... he knows how i feel about drugs i strongly dislike them, i could just about tolerate him smoking and his joints as long as they weren't around me because you know i didnt want to be all controlling of his life it is his after all.

i know that i need to talk to him about this... i just dont really know how to approach the situation, i accepted it will probably be our first argument but im worried he will overdose one day... or im scared that this is it hes hooked forever and he lives the rest of his days as an addict i cant put myself through a relationship like that especially not my first ever one :frown: i do love him but im losing trust that if he continued to be friends with P that they wouldn't stop taking drugs and i dont want to be like hey its either me or P

AITA for wanting him to stop being friends with P? If he cut her off he wouldnt have any other friends for his classes but her habits could seriously ruin him
Reply 1
Original post by Anonymous
Me and my boyfriend are long distance for context I F20 and him M19 I live in the Uk and he lives abroad where weed is legal but i don't know about others
He started being best friends with a girl from college who is 23 and their other friend is 17 the 23 year old lets call her P, was a recovered addict I think alcohol? Anyways last year she relapsed this time falling onto drugs instead in the past couple of months she invited my boyfriend to join in and knowing his addictive personality he didn't decline...
They've been hooked on a drug im assuming its coke but im not too familiar (a white powder thats snorted) they skip class to do it in the bathrooms, i really worry about his health I never thought his friend was a good person or influence but i didnt want to tell him i didnt approve of his friends... he knows how i feel about drugs i strongly dislike them, i could just about tolerate him smoking and his joints as long as they weren't around me because you know i didnt want to be all controlling of his life it is his after all.
i know that i need to talk to him about this... i just dont really know how to approach the situation, i accepted it will probably be our first argument but im worried he will overdose one day... or im scared that this is it hes hooked forever and he lives the rest of his days as an addict i cant put myself through a relationship like that especially not my first ever one :frown: i do love him but im losing trust that if he continued to be friends with P that they wouldn't stop taking drugs and i dont want to be like hey its either me or P
AITA for wanting him to stop being friends with P? If he cut her off he wouldnt have any other friends for his classes but her habits could seriously ruin him

I thought I should come back and add a couple more things that I remembered that I didn't add in the spur of the moment:

P usually is the one to buy the drugs and then ask my bf to join in so like some sorta dependency on this without her his supply or access to it would be limited

Also he never really explicitly told me about his use... I found out through social media where he would be tweeted non-chalantly saying 'I'm so high right now! i love substance abuse' in a sarcastic manner... but it never felt funny or jokey to me sigh i don't really know
Original post by Anonymous
Me and my boyfriend are long distance for context I F20 and him M19 I live in the Uk and he lives abroad where weed is legal but i don't know about others
He started being best friends with a girl from college who is 23 and their other friend is 17 the 23 year old lets call her P, was a recovered addict I think alcohol? Anyways last year she relapsed this time falling onto drugs instead in the past couple of months she invited my boyfriend to join in and knowing his addictive personality he didn't decline...
They've been hooked on a drug im assuming its coke but im not too familiar (a white powder thats snorted) they skip class to do it in the bathrooms, i really worry about his health I never thought his friend was a good person or influence but i didnt want to tell him i didnt approve of his friends... he knows how i feel about drugs i strongly dislike them, i could just about tolerate him smoking and his joints as long as they weren't around me because you know i didnt want to be all controlling of his life it is his after all.
i know that i need to talk to him about this... i just dont really know how to approach the situation, i accepted it will probably be our first argument but im worried he will overdose one day... or im scared that this is it hes hooked forever and he lives the rest of his days as an addict i cant put myself through a relationship like that especially not my first ever one :frown: i do love him but im losing trust that if he continued to be friends with P that they wouldn't stop taking drugs and i dont want to be like hey its either me or P
AITA for wanting him to stop being friends with P? If he cut her off he wouldnt have any other friends for his classes but her habits could seriously ruin him


You are NOT the A-Hole for wanting your boyfriend to not be friends with P. This is a completely reasonable and valid reaction to this and you’re caring about his health and well-being, which is far more important.

Try to have a discussion with your boyfriend about this, in terms of explaining your worry for him and the influence from his friends. You only want whats best for him clearly and you should show him this.

You shouldn’t have to put up with this addiction as well, if he doesn’t want to change. Please try and discuss your concerns and worries with him and see how he responds.

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