The Student Room Group

are uni friends rlly for life?

My family and school tell us that when you make friends in uni, they're most likely the friends you will have for life and have the strongest bond with. I have had the same friend group for 5 years in secondary, my best friend i've known for 14 years. I don't want this to go to waste and it hurts that it might all be for nothing. I don't want to be replaced and i dont want to replace them. Idk what to think of it

Reply 1

Umm not really. It depends

Reply 2

Original post by Anonymous
My family and school tell us that when you make friends in uni, they're most likely the friends you will have for life and have the strongest bond with. I have had the same friend group for 5 years in secondary, my best friend i've known for 14 years. I don't want this to go to waste and it hurts that it might all be for nothing. I don't want to be replaced and i dont want to replace them. Idk what to think of it

Although I am yet to attend uni myself, I have worked with many people who have been to uni and remain very close with their uni friends years and years later. It’s definitely one of those things that will be different for everyone though - some people may not make lasting friendships, but equally many will. There’s no black and white answer but it is definitely a strong possibility - especially if you put the effort in.

HOWEVER, just because you’re likely to make new friendship groups at uni doesn’t mean you have to give up on your friendships from school! It’s not about replacing people, but rather adding to your social circles and gaining new experiences. This is all a part of life and it will happen over and over again once you get into the workplace/if you start a family etc, but the true friends will always find a way to remain in your life. My school friends all went to uni years ago and I’m still close with most of them. Otherwise, although it may seem scary it’s also perfectly natural to grow apart from childhood friends as you go through different stages of life - this doesn’t mean you’ve ‘wasted’ your years of friendship! People will come and go - try and make choices that will be best for YOU.

Reply 3

Not for me, i am only in touch with one of my friend from uni and not so much with her since she moved to Japan. I thought i would be friends-for-life with the housemate i lived with for three years but she took offence to me getting to know a mutual friend and stopped speaking to both of us, that friend is now my best friend, was maid-of-honour at my wedding and will be the be the one i hope i will now keep for life, i don't think my husband is in touch with anyone from uni, his best friends are those from school and the freemasons that he has met here.
For most people no friends are for life. Invariably people will grow and their life expectations, interests, and plans will change and diverge. It's very unlikely two people who are friends will have similar life trajectories and interests across a life time.

Friends are as they suit the time - enjoy them while you have those people in your life, but accept that sooner or later they will be gone. But you will find new people to be friends with who may be even better friends at that later time.

Reply 5

I’m not friends with a single person from school anymore, nor college, people grow apart with time. University friends stay closer connected as you’re older, more mature, and have more in common from same uni to same course or similar job prospects etc. They’re people you’re basically living with and seeing regularly.

Reply 6

Original post by hippieglitter
Not for me, i am only in touch with one of my friend from uni and not so much with her since she moved to Japan. I thought i would be friends-for-life with the housemate i lived with for three years but she took offence to me getting to know a mutual friend and stopped speaking to both of us, that friend is now my best friend, was maid-of-honour at my wedding and will be the be the one i hope i will now keep for life, i don't think my husband is in touch with anyone from uni, his best friends are those from school and the freemasons that he has met here.

Sorry Dobby xx

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