The Student Room Group

Harrassment.

I've noticed something pretty strange: women HATE being ignored, REALLY hate it. Which to some degree is understandable. But what makes it odd is that they even hate being ignored by men. They dont like.
There are many instances online {and in person) I've heard women complain about this but I almost never hear men complain about it. And to make matters worse, if a guy ignores them they will harrass him until he "gives in" (This happened to me but I didn't budge). Women open take joy in harrassing men and find it funny. But something about that doesnt sit right with me, mainly because if a man reacted that way and harrassed a women like that (for any reason not just because a woman ignores him) he will get fired, arrested, or beat up by other dudes. But men just have to hope she leaves him alone or get a new job. Anyone else notice this? Why do they do this?
No, ALL women dont do this but a significantly higher number of women complain about being ignored than men.

Reply 1

What are you asking ?? 😭

Reply 2

Nonsense, men also complain about this constantly and carry out by far the greater amount of harassment.

Reply 3

Original post
by jazz2k15
I've noticed something pretty strange: women HATE being ignored, REALLY hate it. Which to some degree is understandable. But what makes it odd is that they even hate being ignored by men. They dont like.
There are many instances online {and in person) I've heard women complain about this but I almost never hear men complain about it. And to make matters worse, if a guy ignores them they will harrass him until he "gives in" (This happened to me but I didn't budge). Women open take joy in harrassing men and find it funny. But something about that doesnt sit right with me, mainly because if a man reacted that way and harrassed a women like that (for any reason not just because a woman ignores him) he will get fired, arrested, or beat up by other dudes. But men just have to hope she leaves him alone or get a new job. Anyone else notice this?
No, ALL women dont do this but a significantly higher number of women complain about being ignored than men.
First of all, I would like to apologise for hearing that you have been harassed in the past. Nobody deserves to experience that.

Now, I hate to be the one to break this to you but this is a problem that stems from beliefs that have been upheld by the patriarchy.

In fear of being seen as weak, many men won’t report the harassment they experience (so it is often not seen being punished), which is why you have come to the conclusion that there is a double standard for harassment committed by men or by women. Again, with you saying you never hear men complain about being ignored, chances are they’re in fear of how others may perceive them as ‘clingy’.

Personally, I’ve experienced my fair share of men complaining about being ignored, so news flash! It’s not just women, as you have led people to believe.

As a whole, this is just a generalisation of behaviours that you have made from the experiences of yourself and those around you. It’s fairly naive to think that men and women act a certain way from a handful of experiences. Despite having a different experience to you, I did not come to the conclusion that all men love to complain that women take too long to reply.

Making statements like this that generalise any form of harassment is damaging; it can further perpetuate the stereotypes that men must ‘man up’ in situations like this as they are unlikely to be taken seriously (not true), and that women complain about the smallest things and ‘take joy in harassing men’ (do I really need to specify this is also not true???). This would put anybody off seeking help for the harassment they have faced.

Anyways, my overall point is that women do not complain more than men, men are just less likely to report the harassment they face due to stereotypes. I honestly cannot even begin to think of where you go the idea that women enjoy harassing men.

Helpful articles:
https://marquettewire.org/3988006/news/underreporting-among-males-likely-due-to-gender-based-stigma/
https://serc.carleton.edu/advancegeo/resources/reporting.html#:~:text=Multiple%20factors%20contribute%20to%20lack,of%20consequences%20for%20speaking%20out.

Reply 4

Original post
by StriderHort
Nonsense, men also complain about this constantly and carry out by far the greater amount of harassment.

Objectively no, men dont care and you especially wont see them get mad at a woman that THEY reject for ignoring them.

Reply 5

Original post
by lemonsx
First of all, I would like to apologise for hearing that you have been harassed in the past. Nobody deserves to experience that.
Now, I hate to be the one to break this to you but this is a problem that stems from beliefs that have been upheld by the patriarchy.
In fear of being seen as weak, many men won’t report the harassment they experience (so it is often not seen being punished), which is why you have come to the conclusion that there is a double standard for harassment committed by men or by women. Again, with you saying you never hear men complain about being ignored, chances are they’re in fear of how others may perceive them as ‘clingy’.
Personally, I’ve experienced my fair share of men complaining about being ignored, so news flash! It’s not just women, as you have led people to believe.
As a whole, this is just a generalisation of behaviours that you have made from the experiences of yourself and those around you. It’s fairly naive to think that men and women act a certain way from a handful of experiences. Despite having a different experience to you, I did not come to the conclusion that all men love to complain that women take too long to reply.
Making statements like this that generalise any form of harassment is damaging; it can further perpetuate the stereotypes that men must ‘man up’ in situations like this as they are unlikely to be taken seriously (not true), and that women complain about the smallest things and ‘take joy in harassing men’ (do I really need to specify this is also not true???). This would put anybody off seeking help for the harassment they have faced.
Anyways, my overall point is that women do not complain more than men, men are just less likely to report the harassment they face due to stereotypes. I honestly cannot even begin to think of where you go the idea that women enjoy harassing men.
Helpful articles:
https://marquettewire.org/3988006/news/underreporting-among-males-likely-due-to-gender-based-stigma/
https://serc.carleton.edu/advancegeo/resources/reporting.html#:~:text=Multiple%20factors%20contribute%20to%20lack,of%20consequences%20for%20speaking%20out.

Thanks for your reply but no, men dont under report harrassment because of patriarchy (that horrible thing that ironically you benefit from). Its because in the workplace women have a lot of leverage in their accusations. Especially if its a corporate job they will do whats best for the company and protect their image and because women are the fairer sex they will be given the benefit of the doubt even inspite of evidence that doesnt line up. Also boys general get significantly less attention then girls and are told "no" and "you cant" far more. Also the whole "Your our little princess" syndrome doesnt help. Then as teenagers they start getting attention from boys/men. So when a guy decides to not pay them anymind they lose their minds and cant fathom why he doesnt want to talk or engage her. Men dont complain about being ignored because we go being ignored and told toughen up our whole lives. Its not a bad thing tho as it builds character and makes us understand we arent special and the world doesnt revolve around us. A lot of women arent told no, rejected, or ignored enough to brush it off.

Reply 6

Original post
by jazz2k15
Objectively no, men dont care and you especially wont see them get mad at a woman that THEY reject for ignoring them.

Aye you will absolutely see that 😅 you need to get out more, and possibly associate with more whiney men for reference purposes 😅

Reply 7

Original post
by jazz2k15
Thanks for your reply but no, men dont under report harrassment because of patriarchy (that horrible thing that ironically you benefit from). Its because in the workplace women have a lot of leverage in their accusations. Especially if its a corporate job they will do whats best for the company and protect their image and because women are the fairer sex they will be given the benefit of the doubt even inspite of evidence that doesnt line up. Also boys general get significantly less attention then girls and are told "no" and "you cant" far more. Also the whole "Your our little princess" syndrome doesnt help. Then as teenagers they start getting attention from boys/men. So when a guy decides to not pay them anymind they lose their minds and cant fathom why he doesnt want to talk or engage her. Men dont complain about being ignored because we go being ignored and told toughen up our whole lives. Its not a bad thing tho as it builds character and makes us understand we arent special and the world doesnt revolve around us. A lot of women arent told no, rejected, or ignored enough to brush it off.
If we’re going with this route, there are multiple reports that explain how many women do not report the harassment they face especially in the workplace, through fear of losing their job and reputation. Genuine research published on government websites that detail this.

I agree with the other response on this thread, you just need to get out more.

I didn’t know you personally have done research on how the different genders are raised ? But from the research I have studied it actually shows young boys are often left to do as they please whilst young girls have a lot more restrictions. (McRobbie, Sharpe, Oakley and those are just the basics studied in sociology ?)

Sounds like you had a sister you were a bit jealous of 😕
(edited 1 year ago)

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